Caesar

Hey there Kachricof! This is an interesting chapter. I'm intrigued to find out what's going on with the I-Fyre Corp and so forth, and also who is Civen, but most ...

Okay, I liked this. Quite a lot, in point of fact. I liked how you portrayed his inhuman rage, and you definitely managed to convey his hatred for the mentor ...

Oh, this has a prologue too. Fail. The first few paragraphs are an enormous jumbled mess, in my opinion. You speak of gods that came after God, and a God ...

Alright so, I apologize for the comment below. I wanted to change tabs and ended up hitting the submit button. How silly. As I was about to say! I appreciate ...

Hey there. Rubric covered all of the grammar here, so I'll be skipping over that. I'll simply say you should really work on your grammar, capitalization, and punctuation. Plus, in ...

Hmmm, okay so, I assume this is the other Pokemon? Reshiram? And he's giving his name to... what? Who? One of the two characters in the story? This is confusing, ...

Alright, hey dark! I played Pokemon a while back, haven't in a while. I am, however, familiar with the myth of Reshiram/Zekrom creating the country Pokemon Black/White is set in. ...

Hey Kaylyn! Let's get right down to the review. I liked the description at the beginning, and the character's introduction. Very cinematic. I would, however, have mentioned something of the ...

Hey Lylas, here to review, as requested. Good job on the grammar, it's so much better than some of your other stuff I've read. I still think your language is ...

Okay, so you did manage to capture my attention. You give us information without revealing too much, I can appreciate that. However, it was too short. You didn't give us ...

decent beginning, bad development, horrible ending. Your character is lifeless, emotion less. You state the fact there was a war which he did not attend blandly, as if the knight ...

Hi mithrim! Cool username. You really need to show us more in this chapter. You tell us the apprentice is incapable, you tell us he can't cut himself, you tell ...

Now I am very curious in seeing who is narrating to us. You, the narrator, or you, the character? This is certainly a particular style. It seems to me you're ...

You could seriously just add this to the top of your first chapter -- this is ludicrously short. Or you could, better yet, get rid of this. This type of ...

I was happy when you mentioned facing Lucifer. I like novels where you face demons. Unfortunately, I wasn't so happy after having read about two sentences. You really, really need ...