Blink

Hey! =) I'm afraid to say that I don't like this is very much. You have some goods ideas in here and I like how you didn't rely on grammar ...

Hey, Train. For once, we have an innovative approach to an overused theme. I commend you on that - the amount of angsty and whiny poems about sadness or depression ...

Very pretty. =D Not bad, but I feel there's quite a bit lacking. I'm worried about the forced rhyming that seems to have come out a lot here. One some ...

Hey, Khan! I feel a bit lost with this poem. In general, there's no real concept to get under my belt, no real direction other than a long rant about ...

Hey! I don't often read fanfiction, but Assassin's Creed is too awesome. :wink: Grammar It's not bad, but it feels a little too messy. Read out what you say - ...

Hello! Just a quick comment before I start - it's not necessary to capitalise the first letter of every line in poetry. Treat poetry in the same way as prose. ...

*locked* Please only use the fiction forums for posting the actual works themselves. If you post them in the main literary forums, post them in chapters, and if you post ...

Hey, Mark! Let me just... do some reviewing for you. Purple Prose You might have heard about this before - at some parts, you have real trouble with bloating up ...

Hello. =D I thought that the repetition in this was rather effective in some parts, and the rhetorical questions gave an almost mystery, confusion into the piece. But overall, these ...

Hah, I always love reading your stories. They're just so funny. The comment about Scotland got a good laugh. :) So, yeah - agreeing with Pork in that if you're ...

I won't review each and every one, but I'll go through some general feedback. Haiku have a very limited space to be poetic, and as such, you need to think ...

Hello Thorned. =) “ Jack , can’t you just tell me what this is all about?” “ No, [comma] Jane ,” said the man driving the car, handsome and dark ...

Hehe, how did I miss this? Trust you, Sureal. =P Well, yes. It's pretty bad. My friend at school is absolutely obsessed with her, in a kind of creepy way, ...

Hey RedBird! Nice to meet you. =P You have some great imagery in this poem. I particularly like "wandering in a world of blank cold". On the other hand, it ...

Hey pearl! Welcome to YWS! Please sort out that horrendous chatspeak. In fact, no. Get rid of it and put in a title. YWS really, really doesn't like chatspeak. I ...