Areida

Thanks Angel, thanks Misty. Glad you liked it. :D

Since I didn't read the first one, I had to go all the way back to read that one... geez Ari! :) (Seriously, though, the other one was awesome! A ...

Okay, I think what I'm going to do is try and crit a bit at a time, otherwise I'll never finish. I'm so lazy. >.< So here are my comments ...

I do like it capitalized much better, but I much prefer a simple "for Jesus" than "this is for Jesus." I think the "for Jesus!" idea is a lot stronger ...

My dad can't stand the Hobbit, but he loves the trilogy. I preferred The Hobbit to the trilogy very easily. Really a matter of personal preference. Oh, and I tried ...

Quirky contemporary writing, huh? Well, I guess that's a good thing because I'm doing a March NoWriMo on and I'm doing a contemporary novel about two families and I think ...

I moved it to Other Fiction... if that's no good, lemme know and I'll stick it elsewhere. Oh, and welcome to the YWS! :D

Gotta love insanity. And I'm with Duskykins the Lovely... Where the heck is my Chef Boyardee? *stares at the arm of the couch* ... still waiting. *taps foot*

Thank you! I've been trying to write more about things that I know about, things that have happened to me, etc. Just life experience in general. So I guess it's ...

About the quotes, I love quotes... and I feel they add something to the atmosphere of your piece. I do too, almost like another dimension to the writing. I mean, ...

I read it again, and I have to agree with *singsoffkey*. Those two lines could be sold to Dove or Hershey's or Godiva or See's... Oh gravy... I soo need ...

Yeah, Sambo... I know the beginning needs to be stabbed to death with a spork, but this is basically a freewrite; I did it in an hour or so last ...

sarah-- Oh, he is, LOL. dynasty cow-- thank you for reading! :D bob-- you should read my stuff when you're tired more often; that way I don't have to cringe ...

I've seen clips. It's great! :D

Something like this might be incorporated into a novel sometime, but this was really just for the contest. I do have two younger sisters, but it's more based off the ...