ArahniaSiddel

Thank you for the long reviews! I didn't think I would get so many.

Thank you for all the help! I know grammar isn't my strong suite. :? :D I made some changes. A. S.

O.K. Thanks for the help :) I will work on that.

Thankyou for all the advice. I will try to revise it. Or maybe just take the same concept and write a new poem . . . Thanks again A. S.

I love this. I like all your punctuation. All the emotions were great. I liked the ending, and the flow was awesome. I read it out loud and everything was ...

I can't see it :( why don't you just type it in. It is just a poem right. Please p.m. me when you get it up and ready to go. ...

Thank you Jas! I made some changes. I am still not sure about the grammer, but I sent you a pm. Hopefully the new phrases work well. :) A. S.

Thank you for all the advice. I really appreciate it, and I have made a few changes to the second one. I might expand on the second one later like ...

ummmmmm . . . . I can't really comment on the poem. But, what you said before the poem was awful. Please use complete words. :) Thankyou A. S.

This poem is short. Add more details. I am not exactly sure what is going on so I can't help more. A. S.

Thank You for all the help :) I am not going to rewrite it, but I will keep all this in mind for the future.

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm . . . .. .. ??? Whats the point of this?

OK So this is the new poem: Cliff Diving The mist hid, ripped apart, a coward against the wind. Her black hair lashing back, Jealous Her cheeks roses growing in ...

Tanks for the advice. Thats why I posted it. I was probably 8 when I wrote this.I will take another look at it and post it again :)

This is awesome! There are a few words you could take out or change in order to make the flow smoother, but it is still really good. A. S.