AquaMarine

Hey there! So, I haven't read the first parts of your story so I guess I can't comment on how it relates to those. However, I can pick up some ...

Hey there, welcome to YWS! You have some really lovely imagery here. The part I'm most fond of is 'Acid rain runs down my face,'. It's sort of original, and ...

Hey there! Welcome to YWS! One thing I would say, just quickly, is that I don't think you need to put the words in italics. You should let the words ...

Hey there! Welcome to YWS. My problem here is that it doesn't really tell the reader much, you know? As June said, there isn't much of a back story so ...

Hey Forest! As people have said before me, you've done really well with this poem. It has great imagery, and paints lovely pictures in my head. But the repetition is ...

Hey there! The problem for me is that this doesn't feel too much like a poem. That's kind of for two reasons. Number one is that the way it's written ...

Hey Ahmed! Here as requested. I'm just going to go over some points with you. Characters: Jason: Gosh, this guy is boring. And by boring, I mean pretty lifeless. Now, ...

Hey Pink! I don't think I reviewed chapter five, but I'll just move onto this one ... Nitpicks: “For us, duh,” he replied rolling his eyes up . You don't ...

Hey there! What I loved about this poem was your use of imagery and rhythm. It painted vivid pictures in my head, and you kept a wonderful beat throughout. However, ...

Hey Jenny Squirt Jenthura. :D I have to admit, I'm not usually such a big fan of prose-poetry. To me, it feels too much like prose (well, duh) which goes ...

Hey Kyll! This was nice, really nice. I think I've reviewed a couple of your poems recently, and really enjoyed them. You have a nice style. The rhyme scheme is, ...

Oh, Eddie, I absolutely love this one. It feels, to me, more mature than some of your others (although that might just be the lack of ellipses! :D ) But ...

Hey Dreams! Sorry this is a little late. Mistake: It was in there their nature, their very blood. Overall: So, this seems like a neat idea. It seems like a ...

Hey Coco! I'm so sorry about what a terrible reviewer I've been. I've totally slacked off for, ahem, a week. Although I blame the Minions for that, as I'm having ...

Hey there! This was kind of scary, actually, so well done for that. However, I thought it would be quite nice if you evoked more images sometimes throughout your writing. ...