-
Re: The Kingdom of Boredom, Chpt. 7
Hello, So, this is a very good piece with a nice balance of dialogue and description. Your dialogue between characters is very well written and gives a good feel for ...
Sep 23, 2013 -
Re: Unbroken Part 1: Chapter Five
As usual, wow! This is a fantastic follow up to the last chapter. You had a heart wrenching moment, now a heart in your mouth moment. You've done a really ...
Sep 15, 2013 -
Re: Going Home
I like how you start this piece, focussing on time. I can imagine that that is exactly what would weigh on your mind the most if you were in prison, ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Violin Sound
Ok, firstly, as a fellow violin lover and player, not a very good one but still, I can completely relate to this poem. The way that you depict the beauty ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Peaceful Imaginings
This is a good, simplistic poem. It's to the point and doesn't hide behind anything fancy just says what it wants to say. Imagine a world of peace. Where the ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: On the Other Side
This is nice. I found it very calming. I always like shorter poems because I feel that it's better to leave a quick impact, which you've done rather well here. ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Tick Tock
This is great, a lovely and unique perspective on time passing. I like the length, not too long, not too short - it's quite appropriate not to use up too ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Seeking Shurikens
Before I start the review I just want to mention something. I'm not sure if it's that YWS has messed up your formatting, because it does do that sometimes, or ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Jeanette Taylor: The House on Pettigrew Street
This is really good. The description is detailed and interesting. You have a nice introduction to the piece. There are also very few grammatical errors. My first piece of advice ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Empress Fallen - Chapter 2 - Part 2
This is a very good piece. It's well written with good use of description and convincing characters and character relationships. I like the little bits of information about the world ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Unbroken Part 1: Chapter Four
Wow! Just wow! This is my favourite chapter yet. The way that Bella is forced to confront the consequences of what she's done is fantastic. I have a feeling that ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: A Single Black Rose (Chapter 3)
I like how you opened your piece. It's a nice, sweet start that gives the reader a chance to relax before you start with the action in the scene. You ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Risk ch 8
This is a great piece and, though I haven't read the rest of the story, I can safely say that I am enjoying your plot, what I've seen of it ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Dream and Reality: Chapter 1, Part 1
This is good and your story is intriguing. I can't wait to find out more about this world that you've created and I looooooooove magic, so when she started casting ...
Aug 25, 2013 -
Re: Chapter 1~ The Trip
What you've got here is great, some nice descriptions, a good sense of what's to come in the story. There are a few gramatical errors that I'll outline below that ...
Aug 25, 2013
