Aedomir

I actually quite likes that. Not fantastic, but really like the way you get by with such little description, and pull it off so brilliantly. I really like the character ...

Lol! Very good. You know that they all forgot the c on the front of (c)rappers. lol. Interesting twist on the 3 lil pigs. You know you could make a ...

I really like this, it has huge potential. You are a very good writer clearly, and not many grammar issues stand out to me. I think you are very telented ...

Hello! Nice to meet you... civilians send them hurtling send ing barrage of bullets you've already used bullets, although tis a cool phrase... Was it fear, excitement, lust for blood. ...

I don't know why, it just feels as though you are ttrying to cram all which is good from Tolkien's great works, into 100 words... Im unsure about this, I ...

I reckon it would help us if you gave them names. We can't rally like these people without knowing the hell they are! I like this, intersting plot, but remember ...

Hi there! Let's see what we've got... stretching out in the horizon I'm not sure IN is what you want you here, maybe ACROSS would fit better. singing until there ...

I don't know how to feel about this... I like the idea, and would be very interested to see if you can make a novel from this! There are a ...

Im not sure about this sentence: You said: I slammed open the front door, and slammed it closed, locking the door, to delay Ted from entering. Several things here... You ...

I have no idea whether this was intentional but look at this charcters: Dayton - Day Daun - Dawn Twila - Twilight Luna - Moon If that wasn't on pruprose ...

Well done! I thought that was a very original piece with no eyecathcing grammatical errors. There were a few sentence structure problems, but nothing that I thought made it any ...

I can't really ofer you much train of thought for grammar or sentence structure, just to think carefully about what your characters say a bit more. Take LotR for example: ...

[s]I would genuinely say that this is one of my stories on the site so far. I really enjoyed reading it, mostly because this is the type of book I ...

Hi! I like where this is going with this, and it hs potntial but I am still unsure of the plot (what you want?). Anyway, I really liked it, just ...

That would be a good start to a novel, it was funny how she started to kill that guy without knowing it was wrong. The lack of narrative however makes ...