4revgreen

First of all, I loved this little short story and would love to hear more about this character! The simile in the second line did seem a little weak, and ...

First of all, I absolutely love the structural layout of the poem, and they use of colour. It's an effective use that links well with the poem. The use of ...

First of all, that was a beautiful story! Your description was amazing, it really felt like I was there with them. You set the scene so well, I could imagine ...

This poem was absolutely brilliant. I don't think there is anything I can criticise about it! The imagery you were able to describe was somewhat beautiful and in other ways ...

For a first poem, this is genuinely fantastic! I love the rhyme scheme in the first four lines, very good choice of words there. I also like how you change ...

I really loved the imagery that just flows through this! The rhyme scheme really helps it flow too, and the layout of the poem just added to the sense of ...

I like the repetitive nature of the poem, and the fact we're not too sure who the narrator of the poem is talking to. I like how it flows too, ...

I really loved this beginning! You've hooked me in and now I want to know more! You really nailed the description in the story, but however I feel as though ...

You seem very good at writing distinct characters. I was easily able to distinguish the two through their speech and actions! Also, your dialogue was very believable, which is always ...

I genuinely liked the concept behind this little story, so congratulations on hooking me in! However I don't think "once upon a time" is the best way to start any ...