Joyful, exuberant, and full of spirit,
You make my energetic soul sing.
Slow, somber, and lovely in lyric,
You carry me on soft angelic wings.
-
Swiftly, loudly, you consume my mind,
Your tumultuous emotion rages.
Groaning and weeping you won’t leave me behind,
Comforting me as you spill off your pages.
-
Your numerous faces endear me to you,
Your rising and falling leave me entranced.
You’ve always been there and will always be true,
And I will remember how you made me dance.
-
For multiple faces can often be bad,
But yours all remind me of times that we’ve had.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
Okay I must say.....I for one absolutely love it. The words you use are very lovely, and I especially love the line "Groaning and weeping you won’t leave me behind,Comforting me as you spill off your pages." Absolutely beautiful. This simply flows off the page in a very elegant way, the rhythm is excellent a long with the flow, I actually don't have a lot to review in this one, but that doesn't mean you can't improve. You can always improve.
Thank you so much for all your compliments!! Even if you feel like you don't have too much to review, I always appreciate your commentary- and like you said, I can always improve.
Hi wafflewolf7!
I really love this masterpiece! The way you used your wording, emotions, and metaphors, is FABULOUS!
Keep on writing!
~Liberty500
(P.S: Please write another one!)
:') :''''') Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This makes me so happy to see!!
^ me crying of joy
This is really good! I like how you explored the metaphor of the song and showed how songs can help you see things different in your life and affect your emotions, because it is very true that songs affect your emotions and change your perspectives. The only thing that I didn't quite understand were the last two lines "For multiple faces can often be bad,/But yours all remind me of times that we’ve had." Maybe clarify those a little more? Maybe it's just the way I read it.
Excellent and keep up the good work!
Thank you!! In those last lines I was talking about how a two-faced person is not someone you really want to be around, but all the many faces of music can help you despite what you're going through.
Oh that makes sense now!
Hi there!
This is really, really good! The only thing I would change is when you say "Angelic wing" I would say "Wings." To me, it fits better with the rest of the sonnet.
My favorite part:
"Swiftly, loudly, you consume my mind,
Your tumultuous emotion rages.
Groaning and weeping you won’t leave me behind,
Comforting me as you spill off your pages."
You are really, really good! Keep it up!
Loved it! It was so good, I wanna read more! The words flowed. And throughout it, I was imagining the words in my head. Amazing job.
Thank you sooooooo much!! That's what I was going for!