Young Writers Society

I love this. The repetition of "My body is not poetry" really stands out.
I know this is old, but this is one of my favourite things I've read here so far.

My favourite lines are:

"into a question mark
from centuries of insecurity"

"are the kind that are meant to tremble
not the kind meant to be held"

"Because it is not something that
soothes the soul and
makes the heart ache all at once."

The first, third and fourth stanzas are my favourites, because of the imagery and descriptions - it allows me to empathise with what's being said.
I love the last stanza as well, talking about how the speaker is afraid, and how they admit that that's why their body isn't poetry. It almost shows a desire to change, at least, I think it does, but also an acknowledgement of how fear holds us back.

I also like how the body is described in quite a poetic sense (particularly in the first stanza), even though the main focus of the poem is how the speaker's body isn't poetry - it's as though the narrator believes it is the wrong kind of poetry, or that "flawed" things can't be poetic.

This poem is beautiful, and I loved every word.
If this is about your own feelings, I hope you're doing well now. Thanks for writing this

This is a beautiful (but sad) poem.
The imagery is incredible, I especially like the lines:
"Because it won't last as long as | dried ink on yellowed, musty pages."
"the kind that are meant to tremble | not the kind meant to be held."
"They are guideposts".

The first stanza and the fourth are my favourite, as the descriptions and imagery are fascinating and insightful.

If this is based on your own personal experience/feelings, then I wish you all the best and hope you're doing better now.
I love this poem, and I can't wait to check out the rest of your work

really good rhyme scheme constant through out. a basic but effective poem showing off your skills. could of done with a change in tone otherwise it just flows .. nicely mind you but does not create any emotive/ laughter for the reader. next time try to compel your words together use oxymorons to convey your message other wise this was a really great attempt. I applaud you well done and remember next time add that little spark to make the reader not only flow but to fly through the words like they are on a plane.


9/10 welldone

*notices that this just hit 100 likes*

This may be 5 years old, but congratulations on writing such a neat poem @vitamere!

This one's always good for another read!

My body is not poetry.
My spine is curled up
into a question mark
from centuries of insecurity
and the weight of the
worlds trapped in my skull.
(This is my life and I will live this poem)
My thighs are canvases for
atlases, road maps, and
interstate highways that lead to
nowhere. Or everywhere.
They’re big enough for both.
Not when my hands
are the kind that are meant to tremble
not the kind meant to be held.
My hips are not made
for you to skim
your hands over.
They are guideposts:
between (here) and (here)
lies a dreadfully broken girl.
Fantisimo!!
Your poem struck a cord in me, and I am in love with this!!!

Hi! This was written a long time ago, but I still decided to write a review because it's so beautifully written and I enjoyed it a lot.

One thing I especially enjoyed about this piece was, of course, the description. For example, "Because it won’t last as long as dried ink on yellowed, musty pages." and "They are guideposts: between (here) and (here) lies a dreadfully broken girl." were some of the descriptions I just found so wonderfully written. It really sets the mood for the story, grim and personal.
You achieved in getting the reader to know how this person feels about their body, how they think it is not right or not beautiful, like it is broken. This is truly heartbreaking, especially when put into words.

Then we come to the last stanza, which I think of as a sort of twist. The poem was about how this person is not happy about their body, and the last stanza kind of tells the reader that this person is afraid of someone getting close to them and their body because they do not want to know how that person would react? Like, perhaps the narrator doesn't want someone to see or love their body because they don't want to know what the person would truly think of them.

I don't know, I might be reading this all wrong, but that's how I interpreted it.

It was hard finding something for you to change, there seemed to be no flaws in this poem. It painted a perfect, lovely picture of how this person sees themself in my mind, with vivid imagery and description that sets the tone so well.

Good job!

-Space

Hi, Raven here with a review!
Okay, wow. This was really powerful. I'll try to find something to criticize, but it'll be hard.

Positives:
1: There were some really powerful lines in here, and I found my heart melting by the third stanza. I truly hope you don't actually feel this way, and if you do, I want you to know there will always be someone out there who will love you and help you feel better about yourself.

2: The imagery is incredible. I absolutely love the use of connotation and absolutely everything about the third and fourth stanzas' language.

3: "Because it won't last as long as dried ink on yellowed, musty pages." This was brilliant and it broke my heart.

Negatives:
1: The last stanza felt a tiny bit out of place, but honestly, that was all I could find wrong.

Very well done, overall!

This poem is just perfect. Its relevant and written in a beatiful style without any grammatical flaws. The title "My body is not poetry" complements the actual contents of the poem and at the same time, asserts the fact that the poem is about equality and individuality. This poem tells us not to objectify the bodies of others (and ourselves for that matter) and embrace ourselves for who we actually are, which is a very important message in today's world where people are judging each other for exterior beauty only, thus lowering their respect and self-esteem. Loved it! Keep up the amazing work!!

Wow. I cant come up with words that can described what I felt when reading this. It's powerful in the sense of wanting to be more than a something to look at, it has the venerability that everyone feels, It has self loathing, and hope. It's a beautiful poem that will touch many people in ways they haven't before. It has they twisted idea that society came up with, 'the perfect body' image. Your details, metaphors and adjectives are amazing. I really loved this piece. Well done!

This is surely something that is filled with metaphorical words and imagery. To me, this reveals what society thinks the woman body should be. Something perfect. Something flawless and beautiful. But none of this is true. However, this is not all that I have to say.

As much as I think it's interesting, it does not flow well at all. It's also too wordy. But keep practicing. I think you're going to the right destination. keep writing

Can't tell if this is based off of many poems on this same subject (including some that I have written as well) or if this imagery is just that much of a go-to for the topic. This is not fresh.

How did this get re-featured lol

Amazing writing.... you are really good

Every time I read this poem, I just sigh. It's perfect.

This is both amazing and tragic because I think everyone can relate to it. I love all of the adjectives that you used, because they described each individual thing so well. I love every part of the poem, but more than that I love the way it leaves you with a feeling of longing. As though you personally would want to get to know the narrator so personally so that they could get to know. They could turn each thing you do and say into poetry. Every part of it is so beautiful. I can't wait to see more from you, because this is very well-composed.

This is a very beautifully written piece here. Everything about it just screams and pulls you in. The setting, emotion, atmosphere everything was caught and displayed beautifully. I feel that if this was read at a poetry slam the delivery would be hard and forceful kind of like you are screaming at someone. Thats exactly how i was reading it in my head a forced delivery making the reader feel the power of the words. "Not when my hands are the kind that are meant to tremble not the kind meant to be held." I couldnt help but feel sadness in these lines. I feel that the narrotor just doesnt want anything to do with anyone and maybe that was broken a long time ago and the mourning is still there. Finally the way you ended the piece was perfect. "My body is not poetry. Mostly because I’mjust a little afraidof anybody who would be ableto read me so wellto put me into words." This made me feel an abundance of emotion. Mainly because everyone no matter who you are is afraid of wearing their heart on their sleeve. Nobody wants anyone to know whats really going on inside. The only people that do are the ones that crave attention. But for those who dont alot of secrets are kept and oddly you dont want anyone to see you for what you really are and how bad of a condition you are in. Thats just what i feel when i read it. Nonetheless this was a beautiful poem and this is difinitely publishing material no doubt.

This is so beautiful!

You wrote this poem wonderfully. I love the way you compare things to your body parts and the last stanza was my favorite! I don't really read poetry because I can't seem to get it but this one was actually understandable to me! I got the full meaning of this. When you write about how your thighs are big enough for both was brilliant. It's an excellent way to show how some girls are insecure about their size of their thighs. I also loved the part where you said "my body is not poetry because it won't last as long as dried ink on yellowed, musty pages". There were no mistakes in this poem that I caught which makes this poem even more perfect.

Thanks for giving me a good read!

Happy Writing,
Cgirl

This is absolutely perfect.

Very well written. It captures a lot of things perfectly.
the part about 'my thighs' especially touching. Because, that is a big insecurity of mine. this is actually a beautiful piece of work.

Have you ever considered entering it in a competition of some kind? I believe it would do wonderfully.




- Megan xx

This is great, though its sad in a way I loved it!
The part about the thighs:

My thighs are canvases for
atlases, road maps, and
interstate highways that lead to
nowhere. Or everywhere.
They’re big enough for both.

That would have to be my favourite part, I'm quite insecure about my thighs, I feel as though they're bigger than everyone elses but anyway...Great job!

Keep it up!~~!

xx

This is both depressing, and wonderful. Most of all, however, it is incredibly relatable. I love the stanza about the thighs, as that is such a huge insecurity of mine. I don't have any criticisms about this poem, and I applaud you on your wondrous way with words.

This is featured for a reason! Because it's amazing. The whole concept is so out of this world. It's the kind of thing a person can be jealous about because they didn't think if it first.

"My body is not poetry.
My spine is curled up
into a question mark
from centuries of insecurity
and the weight of the
worlds trapped in my skull"

This is brilliant. In reality it would be gross but the visual I get from it is something understandable and very real instead.

"nowhere. Or everywhere.
They’re big enough for both"

An insecurity that many people have and yet it's stated so simply I almost just glossed over it. This poem has such deeper meaning and everything is so subtle and thoughtful. You manage to say so much in so few words, which is a real art.

The descriptive words you use really give good imagery and I like the repetition of the title. I always believe that in writing, but poetry especially, repetition creates emphasis and really drives the point home because it will always draw the readers attention back to those words.

"My body is not poetry.
Mostly because I’m
just a little afraid
of anybody who would be able
to read me so well

to put me into words."

Again a wide felt insecurity. I think this really closes the poem well and through out the work you hint at types of intimacy. Well knowing someone is the deepest kind of intimacy and closeness. I know personally I'm afraid of people being able to explain who I am in sentences because what if I don't, or they don't, or no one...likes what they hear.

Very well done.

This is an extremely beautiful piece. I am not the best at editing poetry, so I will just put in a comment to say that I really liked it. The wording creates quite a catharsis and draws the reader in to the emotional state of the poet. All in all, it was beautiful. Thank you for putting it on here.

--Xreigon

I'm going to be honest here when I say I'm a bit in awe of this poem. I'm going to attempt to review it, but it may turn into me just rambling about how beautiful it is, because that's exactly what it is.

First off, I find it rather odd you've chosen to place italics on some of the beginning stanza lines, but not on others. If it was all of them, I think it would look okay, but since it's only a few, it just looks out of place.

In fact, a lot of your formatting looks really weird.

Like this, for example.

My hips are not made
for you to skim
your hands over.
They are guideposts:
between (here) and (here)
lies a dreadfully broken girl.

My body is not poetry.
Mostly because I’m
just a little afraid
of anybody who would be able
to read me so well

to put me into words.

Such an beautiful way to describe ones body and all her insecurities. Everything is perfect. All of the descriptions, the rhythm, the emotion and the soul in the words. It perfectly describes an woman's body.

-Not when my hands
are the kind that are meant to tremble
not the kind meant to be held.-
A lot of emotion and insecurity(again).


-My body is not poetry.
Mostly because I’m
just a little afraid
of anybody who would be able
to read me so well
to put me into words.-
A powerful ending to wrap up the entire idea of the poem in a few words. It is very easy to relate to which creates interest, and leaves the reader wanting more.

A very emotional piece, a work of art.
Excellent.

-K.

This was absolutely amazing!
I really loved it!

Superb way to put forth the correct definition of the woman's body - at least the ephemeral quality of it. Even if you think it's about somebody who is not perfect in a figurative way, or a disabled person, then also it makes sense.

I liked the approach of the poem.
Keep it up.

Alright I really liked this depressing but good I liked the way you described the character very descriptive I loved it. I don't know if I am right but was it in the head of someone mentally disabled I am not sure and sorry if I am wrong but KEEP WRITING I want to see more from you good job

Wow, I really like this piece.

First of all this is really relate able and speaks to me on an emotional level. So, good job on that :3

As well, the first stanza caught my attention and made me keep reading. Good job on the hook.

Second, the metaphor is something I fell in love with. Especially the stanza about the thighs- that really caught me, made my throat close up. Very good wording.

The flow of the poem is consistent throughout.

This is just a good piece over all and I'm glad I could relate it to so well. Good job.

(sorry this is a crappy review)

Keep writing, definitely.

~~Ayden.

Hi there vitamere and welcome to YWS! I hope you really like it here.

Overall, I enjoyed this piece a lot. It had some interesting images and metaphors, and explored the theme of insecurity in an interesting way. My comments are basically on small stuff.

and the weight of the
worlds trapped in my skull.

Not when my hands
are the kind that are meant to tremble
not the kind meant to be held.