All my life has been full of regret
As all my life has been full of love-
But even though I've been beset
By those who've placed me so highly above,
A cherished vision of total devotion
Hides within the collection of thought
I dismiss as nothing but whimsical notion.
All previous attempts have been for naught,
Yet, my heart beats with insistence
And longs for assistance
Of love that will never come to me.
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140,138 Literary Works • 673,032 Reviews
Hi! RSTorres here for a review...
First of all, I want to say that I absolutely love this and it was a very enjoyable read.
The deep meaning or message behind this poem was really lovely. I am a sucker at love poems and the best kind are the persistent ones.
The tone and flow of this poem was really smooth. I can say this poem without going out of the normal beat. Some poems have lines that are just too hard to keep a beat in.
Your word usage is impeccable. I sense an old soul within you. Just by the words you use, it shows you are a person that will be great at conversing with.
Your rhyme schemes are great! This went great with the flow in which you put your poem in. I enjoyed the rhyme schemes the most. I applaud you for it.
The length could have been just slightly longer but it still looked great this way. Either way, I can say you are very talented at writing.
Overall, you did a great job with this piece and I sincerely hope I get to see ore work from you in the future.
Hey rubykae!
I'm actually surprised that this poem hasn't received any reviews as of yet, as it is a wonderful read and I believe that other readers would certainly enjoy reading it.
I really loved the rhyming scheme, the theme of love and the way you have organized it. It's great! Although, it did feel like it ended abruptly. Before the very last line, it felt like the intensity of the poem was building up at this point and that the last line halted this intensity. I believe that this poem could use at least five or so more lines before the last one that ultimately draws the conclusion. With a few more added lines, it will feel as though the words are flowing all the way to the very end.
Other than that, it was enjoyable to read! Good job and continue to write, my friend!
Can't wait to read more from you!
MissLyricz x
It was a quick little thing I just jotted down so that explains the length, but I like the idea of adding more lines in. Thank you so much!
No problem! Happy to help! x