I’d glance up and he’d be dangling cheekily from a branch, on the first occasion munching heartily on an apple that seemed far too green.
*
During our first meeting, when he had suddenly hung down from a nearby maple tree causing me to shriek with alarm, he asked me my name. And, being a petulant child, I stuck out my lower lip, scowled, and turned away.I wasn’t used to strangers.He laughed. ‘Of course, I know your name already, Alice Green,’ he chuckled.
*
This caught my attention. I whipped around. “How?” I demanded.
*
‘Because I know everything, Alice Green,’ he smirked, casually spitting an unforeseen pip to the ground. I recoiled, giving him a look of derision. ‘Don’t call me that. And how?’
*
‘Because we are one and the same. I am you and you are me. So there is nothing we don’t know about each other.’ I blinked, confused.
*
‘But I don’t know anything about you.’ I said. This boy, with his tanned, dark skin, his bright green eyes and faded green shirt with brown jeans puzzled me. And yet there was something in him that I liked, that felt right somehow.
*
There was a shuffle as he dismantled himself from his branch and hopped to the ground. ‘Want to play? He asked, extending a hand for me to take. My eyes flickered between him and the house I had left in the distance. I hesitated. ‘She’ll still be here when we’re done. She said she’d check on you in a few hours, remember?’ He said gently, placing a hand on my shoulder.
*
‘Okay,’ I whispered, placing my hand in his. All trepidation gone, I whooped with joy as the uncertain life I had left was swallowed by the trees that clung to us as we ran.
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125,024 Literary Works • 672,762 Reviews
Hello again, priceofwords.
This bit of speech tells me so much about the character and the words are just so... mad? Okay, so I don't mean you were mad to write this. When I picture him saying these words, to me he looks like a madman twirling around, gleefully addressing an audience. Sort of like the Joker. That's a good thing, by the way.
I'll mostly just point out typos and any grammar nitpicks, since most of the things I love about this chapter, I mentioned in my previous review. Like the way you split your paragraphs, and the simple but majestic flow of the sentences.
and turned away.I wasn’t used to strangers.He laughed
There needs to be a few more spaces in this chunk.
“How?” I demanded.
‘Because I know everything, Alice Green,’
I noticed that you used two different symbols to identify dialogue. It's best to stick to using one. Sometimes authors will use apostrophes for thoughts, and speech marks for dialogue. If you use both, the reader may think you've taken this approach and get confused.
‘Because I know everything, Alice Green,’ he smirked, casually spitting an unforeseen pip to the ground. I recoiled, giving him a look of derision. ‘Don’t call me that. And how?’
You need a new paragraph when a new character speaks.
‘Because we are one and the same. I am you and you are me. So there is nothing we don’t know about each other.’ I blinked, confused.
I said I wouldn't, but I'm pointing out something I love.
So there you go. Hopefully I'll make my way through quickly so I can review the newer parts; you'll probably find that more helpful.
Not sure if British, or US.. The apostrophes/quotation marks are confusing me on this one. But otherwise, great work!
I would love to know more about this stranger, by the way. He seems pretty cool. But creepy. Creepy indeed. I would love to role-play with him.
On another note, I'll be reading part three in a moment. Thank you for writing this for all of us to enjoy, I appreciate work like this!
I'm British - the apostrophes were a mistake
And great, thanks for the review! 
Hi,
Yet, here i'm giving you a chaining reviews!
I don't want to say much but surely, i love the ideas you used. The plots is overall, good and steady! You're giving me a really euphoria time here! Yet, i truly wanted you, i wanted to know the charcters better! And you don't need to tell me, i'll definitely read more. Keep writing that way, a miracle is about to happen!
I hope you'll giving me another chance to enjoy your pieces like this one and the previous. Yet, keep writing and i hope this helped ya!
—Nicol
P/s: sorry...i was on phone..!! XD
—Nicol
P/s: sorry...i was on phone..!! XD
Thank you so much for the review! I believe Part 3 is currently out, so if you want to find out more about them keep reading
I said "Don't tell me! I know. I know what to do!"
BTW, no problem, don't be mad. Cheers!
hi! well i just wanted to say this is a great story. i love the mystery of it and how you made it so we hang on to every word. i love your description for everything you described in here. it was wonderful. i cant wait for the next part because i know itll be just as good if not much better!
hi! well i just wanted to say this is a great story. i love the mystery of it and how you made it so we hang on to every word. i love your description for everything you described in here. it was wonderful. i cant wait for the next part because i know itll be just as good if not much better!
Thank you so much I'm glad you enjoyed it!
youre welcome !
Hello there again, Adel here for a review!
You are doing a awful great job at hooking me to your writings! This was so cute! I love it! My favorite part was when he was in the tree eating the apple. On that line I think it would sound better like this.
..."on this occasion munching heartily on a red apple that seemed far to green."
I say this because there are green and red apples, it just describes the apple a bit better. In the second and third paragraph you missed a space after you're period, in starting a new sentence. An easy fix, I've done it many times before. Yet again you used apostrophes instead of ( " ) marks. It's also very important when a character speaks you indent, stat a new paragraph. It makes it a whole lot easier to understand.
But other than I think this story is really, really good!
Thank you, I will try to administer those corrections in part 3
I'm glad you're enjoying the story!