She felt him, he was warm, but he wasn't touching her. He leaned up against the truck along with her, making her shift over a little to give him more room, inviting him. Bridget wanted to introduce herself, but it wasn't her style to be the first one to break the silence. "Havin' a good time?" Andrew didn't make any eye contact with her, instead he focused on something in the distance. Bridget felt extremely happy inside, almost like she could forgive anyone who had ever done her wrong, just because Andrew said something to her.
"Yeah, guess so," said Bridget. She couldn't hold in her smile, and tried to hide it. He let out a soft laugh, making her smile even more.
"You don't sound convincing." Andrew reached into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out a box of Camels. He brought the cigarette to his soft lips and let it hang while he traded the box for a lighter. He lit up his cigarette and took a puff. Bridget watched Andrew intensely, his every move was being stored in her mind. "Want one?" He asked.
"No thanks," she said smiling at him. She couldn't help the feeling inside her. The cancerous scent of the cigarette smoke didn't bother her. The smell fit in perfectly with the beer on her breath, and the smell of forming dew drops on the lawn. Andrew blew the smoke away from her, letting her know that he cared about her existence. "I'm Bridget, by the way." She felt strange saying her name before he mentioned his, and she wondered why she was acting so differently.
"I'm Andrew. Not Andy, just Andrew," he stated. This time he looked at her, and was glad that he came over to talk to her. She was prettier than he had ever thought possible. She didn't talk too much and seemed to be relatively mellow. Andrew then began to feel self- conscious about his dirty work books and dusted white t shirt. He attempted to dust off stained dirt and shuffle his feet, but it was no use. Bridget took notice.
"Where do you work?"
"For Mr. Fallon and his ranch. Sorry, I'm still in my work clothes." He didn't want to mention that his work clothes double as his day clothes. "So do you go to the high school?" He felt stupid asking simple questions, but he had to find out one way or another.
"Oh, yeah. I'm just a junior, but I got another year, I guess."
"Yeah, I graduated like two years ago." Bridget did the math in her head; he was either nineteen or twenty. There was a slight silence before Andrew threw down his cigarette and engraved it into the drive way. "Listen uh, what are you doing tomorrow night?" Andrew prayed that Bridget didn't already have a boyfriend.
"Nothin', why?" Bridget filled with a new and giddy feeling inside of her.
"Do you want to go to dinner, or something? Only if you want to though, it's totally up to you." Andrew knew that he only needed one statement to ask her out, and felt silly for adding extra words.
"Sure," Bridget replied. She wrote down her phone number on his cigarette box, and left the party. Once she got far enough down the road, she screamed as loud as she could. Bridget had never felt so alive in a long time, she had a voice to put with the face that had been in her head for so long.
End of chapter
Continue to next chapter Attaction and the Bad Boy(3)Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,859 Literary Works • 673,695 Reviews
hey,,
so it's a short story, no wonder the last part was quick,, that's cool though, i just find this part okay, unlike your 1st part, where there's much going on in her head and there were promising events.. so what i get is, Andrew likes her also and they're going to live happily ever after.. ofcourse, that's not yet to happen, right? i hope to read interesting events on your next installment, and keep it short as this one, i like it!
Good, but it was a little too fast and characters had little emotion. I felt nothing really; no excitement or happiness of any kind, it was pretty drawl.Boneless without any meat. I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but your story needs a bit more description and imagery that's all. I really do like where its going though.
Great story! As soon as I got the email from the webmaster I opened it up... and wala! There it was! So this is a really awesome story, but yeah, like Nike said I would be helpful if you described the surroundings a little bit more. I know you just started this but I had a question about the title: It doesn't really sound like Andrew is that bad, is he really? It's probably just an impatient question that's been in the back of my head for a while, you'll get to it, I'm sure!
This is good, maybe you should discuss how Andrew felt about Bridget a little, like BEFORE he asks her out, yeah? Okay that's about it. Overall terrific job! And I hope chapter three comes up faster than chapter two! Just joking, but great job!
Keep on keeping on!
~Hugs,
Rose
Remember: Its going fast because its a short story.
nice. I loved it! just slow down a bit, the pace is so fast. and show some more emotion in your characters. sometimes I couldn't tell who's saying so fix that too. I also thought the you didn't describe the surroundings at all, do that. But over all I loved it so much! I can't wait to read the next one (if there is gonna be a next 1!)
Nike