z

Young Writers Society



The Thing About Silence

by pineapple321


Silence is comforting

Silence is calm

Silence is interesting

It is never wrong

---------------------

Yet.

Silence can be fear

Silence can be dangerous

Silence is always near

It is treacherous

---------------------

But, silence happens

There's no denying

It is almost like balance

In our world that is crying

---------------------

We cannot be silent

No matter how safe it may feel

We are not quiet 

This is real


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Points: 236
Reviews: 4

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Thu May 27, 2021 6:01 pm
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LizzAndTheNifflers wrote a review...



Hello Pineapple! I would like to give your poem a short review since I found it very interesting and the style of writing used here is quite appealing.

Quick disclaimer before I begin, I am in no way a professional or anything remotely similar to that so my advice may not be particularly correct!

First of all, I would like to say that I love the themes you have expressed here. Experimenting with the idea that a word can have many different meanings is one of my favorite things to see in literature, especially in poetry. The first stanza is beautifully written and the rhyme between "calm" and "wrong" is very satisfying. I really like how you used fairly simple lines all throughout the poem, it really added a nice effect to the message you were trying to convey.

There are I couple of small things that felt a tiny bit off to me. I did not quite grasp the rhythm or flow of the poem, of course poems don't always need to have a set rhythm but maybe it would be a good idea to add a pattern that ties together all the stanzas. I am not the most perceptive person but I also did not really understand the metaphor behind the last two stanzas. This is probably entirely just me being bad at understanding poetry though, ha-ha!

Overall, a fantastic effort and I really enjoyed reading and analyzing your work!




pineapple321 says...


Thank you so much for the review! And don't worry at all, you are not bad at understanding poetry. Your critiques were very valid, and I'll make sure to work on the rhythm for my next poem. Thanks again :)



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Sun May 23, 2021 4:06 pm
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Shayna Basu wrote a review...



Hey There !!!!
Wow Your poem is indeed absolutely stunning that I cant express it in words ...
Your Originality and Expressiveness is exemplary just like your writing skills ...
You have presented both the Horrifying and the Sweet truth of Silence that is so relatable to the contemporary times ,when people yearn for silence and calm to escape from the hectic reality ….
You are truly a promising writer
Looking forward for more poems
Cheers!!!




pineapple321 says...


Thank you so much :)



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Sun May 23, 2021 8:26 am
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LittleLee wrote a review...



Hey there, pineapple, I hope you're having a good day and staying as safe as you can!

When I read the title, I immediately thought of the song The Sound of Silence. It's silly, I know.
Your poem itself is rather good. You've played with the idea of silence and what it means to you and what it can mean to others, and it's intriguing to see what you think. You did contradict yourself in the poem - whether that was intentional or not, I think you need to clarify what you want to express - which made me doubt the point of the first stanza.

You end by saying, "We cannot be silent."
Well, that depends on the allegorical meaning of silence in this poem. Supposing it is sadness or depression; yes, it is comforting and calm, even interesting, but not something we should actively pursue. So I can agree with you. What if I interpret it as death, or peace? Is it really so bad then?
My mind is a little clouded, so if there's a much deeper meaning I don't think I've found it.

Now, regarding structure. I don't see the need for a rhyme scheme. Good poetry does not need a rhyme, and while it can often emphasize certain parts of the poem, here it is redundant and has inhibited your skill. Matching "comforting" and "interesting" feels out of place.

Silence can be fear

Silence can be dangerous

Silence is always near

It is treacherous

Dangerous and treacherous... well, it's a solid rhyme, and not entirely out of place, but it does make me think you just fed your rhyme scheme without stopping to improvise your wording.
See, the rhymes don't serve any purpose in this poem. The last stanza, for example, feels like a tad messy because it isn't clear what you're trying to do; express yourself or make a structured rhyme. You haven't gone with either, and it led to something that can definitely be further revised.

Otherwise, I like your diction. Words like "balance," "denying," and "safe" introduce new thoughts and allow the reader to explore hidden meanings better. Good job.

You seem pretty talented, so I hope you weren't offended by my review! I'd just like to see you improve in your writing. Good luck!

~ Lee




pineapple321 says...


Thank you so much for the review! I will definitely work on the things you critiqued.



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Sat May 22, 2021 4:15 pm
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TheWordsOfWolf wrote a review...



Good morning, good evening, good afternoon, and goodnight, as well as many other pleasant things that I do not have time for as I am here to review this. Anyway, wolf here.
I really love this poem I can tell you put a lot of thought into it and it really shows through.
I find this very relatable as I often find myself seeking silence because as you said "Silence is comforting"
It is indeed a very beautiful and well written poem. Nice work I look forward to seeing more of you work in the future

As always,
Wolf




pineapple321 says...


Thank you so much!



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Fri May 21, 2021 11:56 pm
Tunk20 says...



Hi Pineapple321 I love this poem, because you put a lot of thought into it. This poem was very interesting to read, and I love the effort you put into it. I love the vocabulary and the amount you put. Keep up the great work because your peaces of work are very nice to read.




pineapple321 says...


Thanks so much!




We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.
— T.S. Eliot