she says i have strange inhibitions

Hi babyshowerspeech, here to leave a shor.....I mean, a review for you!

When I first read this poem, I was literally shook. Like, everything is so powerful, how you worded it, everything gave me literal chills, you had an extremely strong voice in this piece, and I really mean it. Also, I know this was a super long time ago, so I hope I don't make bad stuff resurface from this review.

i am pursued. by a lover--
he is beautiful and brutish.
nothing. yet everything.
he tells me-- "i am sorry.
i don't know why. i just am."
as i am wiping away my
leftover decay.
off the lungs. on to
the heart.

Something I noticed in this stanza and also the rest of the poem is that you use very short sentences, which I think is very effective in saying a lot in the least amount of words, and as if each is a different thought. When you say, "nothing. yet everything." and "off the lungs. on to the heart." it gives this feeling and gives space for the reader to think between words, which makes the poetry have a very strong voice. Also, the imagery of wiping away leftover decay is so painful, conveying the idea of the body rotting. As in many of your poems, there is this imagery of death, which is very effective for the stuff you write about.

i feel like. a sea. some
cold and harsh thrashing wave.
splaying his dead carcass
across a rock beach.
washing away the remains.
no blood, no death.
there is no acrid scent
lingering.

The voice of this stanza is cold and unflinching, but in a good way, not in a cruel way, but as in it reads perfectly to the kind of way you want to it to be read, such that it carries out this picture really well. Again there is this recurring idea of death, this time described as the other person, and the idea of a rotting corpse, but without any smell. This image is very vivid, I can tell, almost every sense is described in great detail. I also love the image of being a sea, vast and being abiotic and not living, yet still pulling differentiating forces.

rani told me, "you. you. you,
are the worst thing ever in my
life. your stagnancy, your
bitterness. your grudges."
i think she was right.
every time he reaches out
i spit at the sight and
turn him down. "pity is for
the weak." the first
father reminds me.

The repetition of saying "you" in this stanza is really powerful, and all the things in quotes feel very direct, and we can feel their words like knives. Probably the only real critique/suggestion I have in this entire poem is that you can carry on the theme of death and the sea onto this stanza as well, and somehow connect it to something here, and that would add even more to the poem. Again though, this is just a suggestion and is totally up to you if you consider doing this. Unless, of course, you separated them on purpose. Then goodbye.

yet i carry him as a
soldier's burden, tides
ripping across my boots
as i feel the rot radiate
to my core. rani said that
"you will know. everything
i've done will make sense."
and she was right. because
i feel just like her.
burying a body.

I really like the metaphor of a soldier burden, indicating that you might be worn out from carrying this burden across long stretches of time. I also think you tie everything back really well, too, from what you've said before, which is perfect for the final stanza. By the way, your line breaks are literal perfection, I thought I'd say.
Finally, I lied. I have the most nitpicky thing, which is that you say "burying a body" in the final line, which is kind of separate from the idea of the sea and a body awash on the sea, which can be completely different, in some ways. I don't know, this is kind of weird but it just felt strange to suddenly return to the ground at the end. But that just me.

Anyways, if you couldn't tell, I really loved this poem and I was really moved by it and it made me really feel the emotion of it when I read it. Awesome writing euls!!!!! See you tomorrow.

Keep writing!!!!!!!!!!

- Ant


*I wonder who made this banner
**Also, this is a TURTLE not a TORTOISE, foolish child (jk I love this banner it's so cute)