Young Writers Society

Here is part two to the intro for RoLC. Enjoy!

Come delve into the lives of the unlucky and unfortunate. This is the realm of Lousy Characters.

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Intro Part Two

The main doors rattled violently and the screaming continued.

“Help me!! He's going to kill me!”

The assembled characters looked around at each other and Sheerluck coughed.

“Umm, the doors are unlocked. Just push.” he shouted.

The doors still rattled, obviously being pulled from the other side. Emma heaved a very long sigh and slowly arose.

“It looks like she showed up, finally.” She glided over to the doors and pulled them open.

An absolutely terrified blonde girl dashed past her and into the safety of the hall, collapsing dramatically against a column. Her eyes darted around wildly.

“Is he still after me?”

“If by 'he', you mean that cat that just wandered back off towards the woods, then no.” Emma said, shutting the doors and bolting them.

“Phew, I thought I was a goner. Doors are so hard to open…” the girl said, then stared around the hall, smiling faintly.

“Hey guys… I didn't really say I would be coming to this meeting, 'cause I didn't know if I'd make it this far without dying...”

The room fell dead quiet, the silence only broken by a few muffled coughs. Captain Cliche murmured aloud,

“She seems like a loose cannon...”

“Ah, I suppose I should introduce our new arrival.” Emma said, clearing her throat.

“This is That One Girl from every Horror Movie.”

“That's a mouthful...” Fan Girl commented dryly. “Reminds me of the Snackstreet Boyes… They're literally my favorite band ever.”

The girl laughed timidly.

“Yeah, I don't really have a name… My author never bothered to give me one, since I died in the first three minutes of the movie.”

“Wait, do screen writers count as authors?” Princess Alice asked.

“Of course they do.” the heap of armor, known as Knight Robert, responded grumpily.

“If it were up to me, I'd show her the door.” Captain Cliche muttered.

“That doesn't even make sense! You're doing that on purpose.” Fan Girl said, elbowing him sharply.

Emma rapped her knuckles on the table to regain attention.

“I think it would benefit us all to finish hearing each of your tales. That One Girl from every Horror Movie, you may take a seat at the table.”

“Can we shorten that, because I'm not calling her all that.” Princess Alice snapped. Emma rubbed her temples gently.

“Fine then, Horror girl. Is that acceptable?” Every head nodded in unison.

“Good. Now, Princess Alice and Knight Robert, please share your stories with us. Try to keep them succinct.”

Alice fluffled her hair daintily, placing a pale hand across her brow.

“Ah, yes, my tragic story of woe. I'm glad you asked for my story, because it really is my story.” She cast an extremely obvious glance at Robert, who didn't seem to notice her, perhaps due to the helmet covering his entire face.

“I come from a long and proud line of royalty. My father owns approximately ten kingdoms, although the bordering ones are still under debate as to where they end and the other much less important people's property begins. He had to build three barns in order to store all the gold and gems that we own, one for him and my mother, one for me, and a small one for the nobles and other uninteresting people. My four handmaidens are always complaining about the lack of distributed wealth and such in our realm, but they're just spoiled. It's not like the royal family has all the wealth in the kingdom! Well, the ten kingdoms. I gave away my pony just last year. Now I only have two, which makes me pretty upset...”

“Wow, I can feel the tragedy just seeping through this story...” Fan Girl muttered.

“I'm getting to that! The tales and lore of my father's wealth has spread to practically every evil ear in our realm, and thus, I've become the unwitting target of countless kidnapping attempts and threats! You wouldn't believe how many dragon lairs I've been carried off to, or horridly ugly villainous scum bags that have dared to mess up my perfect appearance. Robert, tell them about it! It's simply unfair!”

The knight lifted up the visor of his helmet, revealing a pair of warm brown eyes and a strong, angular, clean-shaven jaw. As he spoke, his voice was muffled by the thick, dented metal helmet.

“Oh yes, unfair indeed. And who had to save her from all of those kidnappings? Do you know how many dragons I've had to slay? Twenty-four! Twenty-four dragons that have somehow 'caught her off guard' while she was wandering in the woods, alone, for hours on end, and then she has the nerve to blame me! We've been betrothed for two and a half years, and she hasn't remained in the kingdom long enough to have a wedding ceremony! I'm tired of it! And it's not exactly like I can just hire another knight to help me out! No, it has to be the brave knight, rushing into the jaws of death to rescue his sweetheart. Nothing else will please the author! I just can't do this anymore…” Robert sniffed, trying to reach through the helmet with a gloved hand to wipe away his tears.

Emma glanced around the table. “Thank you, Alice and Robert. All right, is that everyone? Oh, Fan Girl, you haven't shared yet. Do you mind?”

“Oh, not at all. Hi everyone, I'm Fan Girl. I guess I don't have a lot to say, except my author was struggling for ideas. She wanted to make a superhero sidekick that would be useful in getting places, but she didn't really consider that I would be useless once I got there… My propeller suit has about a 7 hour battery though, so that's a plus. And then she also thought she'd be all clever and make me obsessive over boy bands and fandoms. I must admit, I have managed to stay away from some of the crazier fandoms. But man, that Once Upon a Rhyme series is so good...”

“Thank you for sharing, Fan Girl. Thank you all. Again, I realize that this isn't easy to open up about, especially for some of you who aren't even sure of your identities. That is what we are here to resolve. Now that we are all familiar with the kinds of abominable stereotypes and unfortunately horrific character developments that the authors are capable of, we are better equipped to help each other to resolve these issues.

“Here is my proposition: I have several friends who have managed to work through these stereotypes and poor writing and made themselves into great characters. They are willing and ready to help each of you do the same. This program is confidential, and will be taken on by an experienced author that is also willing to help you, so your authors won't be able to find you and try to change you back to who you were before. I promise you that if you all are willing to work hard, you can become the things of fanfiction.”

“Don't you think we might have all bitten off more than we can chew?” Captain Cliche piped up, a worried tone in his voice.

“Nonsense, good citizen. You can do anything you set your mind to.” Megaman said, tucking a Sharpie into his suit. Captain Cliche glanced down at his sleeve.

“Did you just… autograph my sleeve?”

“Oh, sorry, bad habit...”

Emma's eyes swept over every face. “We must take this to a vote now. I realize that it's a tedious and lengthy process, but I promise that it will be worth it in the end. Everyone in favor of participating in this program, say aye.” There was silence in the hall for a few moments, then Fan Girl said,

“Aye. I'm not going to let poor puns get in the way of fulfilling my destiny.”

“Well, an aye for an aye, I suppose.” Captain Cliche said, grinning mischievously.

Megaman was the next to speak, followed by Sheerluck.

“Aye.”

“Aye.”

Alice nudged Robert, hissing,

“What if these 'friends' of hers decide they want my wealth and kidnap me?”

“Oh don't worry, fair princess, they wouldn't hold onto you for long. You'd talk their ears off in an hour. Aye!” Alice scowled, crossing her arms indignantly.

“Fine… Aye.”

All eyes were on Horror girl, who stared around wide-eyed.

“So… this means that I could maybe live through my movie?”

Emma smiled, shrugging her shoulders as she said,

“Who knows? Maybe you'd even become the heroine.”

“In that case, then aye.” Horror girl giggled, her eyes flashing. “Maybe I'll even become the killer...”

For the second time, a dead silence fell across the room.

“Creeeepy.” Fan Girl whispered.

“Well, good citizen, like I always say, you can do anyth...”

“If you autograph this designer shirt, I'll haunt you for the rest of your life.”

“Oh… Right, well, never mind then.”

Emma nodded her head. “Well, that seems to be unanimous. As part of the identity protection program, I'm afraid that I'll have to arrange for all of you to be 'killed off' in your particular stories. Then you can have much more freedom in what kind of character you become. Unless you have one of those authors who's into the whole killing off and bringing characters back to life thing. If so, then we will have something arranged. For now, however, you can all take a room in the east wing. Horror girl, I arranged to have the door taken out of your room, so you'll have a better chance of survival if something happens. We will reconvene in the morning. Good night.”