The True Throne (Chapter 3)

by YP@17

Published January 8, 2022

E - Everyone

In The True Throne

(Note :

Western Kingdom - Rame & Ryan ||

Eastern Kingdom - Swix, Sare, Sxes, Marian, Epsilon ||

The Wall under Sxes(Capital of Eastern Kingdom) )

CHAPTER 3 

RYAN (Western Kingdom):

On the way to the hallway passage, Commander Brock met Master Ari.

The two are going to a meeting organized by the king.

Commander Brock says: "Master, are you also heading toward the meeting hall."

Master Ari says: "Yes, commander, I think you were also summoned for the meeting."

Commander Brock says:" Aye, can I ask you, something Master, the newcomers joining the army, can we raise their salaries. "

Master Ari says: "You can ask the king."

Commander says: "Is there any chance you think the king can allow it."

Master says: "It depends what he wants, this year, I don't think he is interested in the army. we are facing a food shortage this year."

Master looking at the time says:" Commander, I think the time is up. we should leave for the meeting."

Commander gives way to Master Ari.

He follows him.

They both reached the meeting; the meeting was full of 4 to 5 members. Ministers, commander, every big person was summoned for a meeting.

Everyone knows something really big is going to happen in this meeting. Because seeing Every important person of the kingdom in the meeting it is predicted that King Acelin is up to something.

King arrives at the meeting and everyone gets up and greets him.

King sits down on a chair. Gives the order to sit down.

King had some letters in his hand.

King Acelin says: "I think everyone is here, good morning to all, it's a really pretty day. and it is good to see all the pillars of Ryan all together."

Everyone was a little pumped by the king's words.

Master Ari says: "suddenly, a meeting with all of the officials. Is there something wrong?"

King Acelin smiles and says: "Nothing at all, Master, things are fine, I'm just here to tell you we are preparing for the war."

Suddenly, the atmosphere of the meeting got serious. Everyone was shocked by the king's words, just silent all over the meeting.

Master Ari says: "War! , and... who are we against."

King says: "We are going against the WALL, THE EAST!"

Commander Brock shockingly says: "THE WALL?"

King says: "wall! we are going to break that thing."

Somehow everyone looks a little scared inside. In their lifetime it never came to their mind to go to war against THE WALL.

Master Ari says: "We need allies! to go against the wall, it's not going to be easy."

Commander Brock says:” Also, some men.”

King Acelin says: "I know, I already prepared for that, the letter in my hand, after each of you agrees, we are going to send a letter to Rame. We are going to ask for the men for war, other resources as well. but, after this discussion is over."

Master Ari says: "Did you think Rame threw their men in others' hands."

King Acelin says: "Letter is not about the war, it is about just a friendly meeting between two brotherhood kingdoms."

Master Ari says: "That's a wise choice."

King Acelin says: "I just want one thing from you all. Did Ryan have resources so we can go against the wall?"

All members share positive answers.

King Acelin says: "So, Ryan Can afford this war."

Commander says: "Aye, King."

King says: "Good, that's the answer I expect from you all."

Master Ari says: "What about food shortage."

King says: "Can we survive two winters, with supplies we had."

Master Ari says: "We can survive three winters. But, afterward, even god can't help us."

King Acelin says: "Who needs god when we are going to celebrate our victory on another side of the wall."

and raised his glass. Everyone has a smile on their face by raising glasses. It was an uplifting moment.

Concluding the meeting, Ryan is going to ask Rame for some men to join the war against THE WALL.

In the meeting, designed the whole roadmap, of how all reserves and resources are going to be spent on which things also, all other important things that are going to affect Ryan politically and economically discussed in the meeting.

The result of the meeting satisfied the king because he brought every person in the meeting on the same page.

After the meeting,

Commander Brock asks: "can. I ask u something, my king"

King Acelin says: "Sure, Commander."

Commander says: "I think this is not a good time to ask, but I want to ask you. Newcomers need to pay a little higher."

King says: "discuss with master if he says yes, then I am fine with it"

King asks the master: “if it's possible then do it."

Master says: "We think that we need to analyze the whole budget and reserves newly. But I think it's possible."

King is satisfied with the master and says to the commander: "It's good to see you are standing for newbies. I'm glad to have a commander like you."

And he leaves the hall.

Commander smiles and says to the master: "it's on you, Master!"

Master Ari smiles a little and says: "bastard!"

So, at the end of the meeting, the letter is sent to the Rame.

SWIX (Eastern Kingdom):

The Master Snorii already left Swix for Slagon.

Lady Livia already sends a letter to enlighten the issue about the money they didn't receive, even giving large production of food sources to the Epsilon. Knight Kiar went to deliver a letter to the Epsilon.

At this time, people don't get repaid for their efforts.

Some people understand. Some people who don't want to be under the reign of the lady start using these loopholes to provoke revolt against her.

They started by A tavern (which is a place of business where people gather to drink alcoholic beverages and be served food, and where travelers would receive lodging) where people can easily manipulate. So, the Knight Fonz got news about these issues.

The Knight Fonz is trying to stop such propaganda from spreading.

In the next meeting, these issues are discussed.

Lady Livia replied: "We are not rulers, we are the protectors of people who have trust in us, and other people who are getting manipulated by rumors can easily be manipulated by anything. Don't waste time giving them advice."

Knight Fonz says: "but, people are buying this crap."

Lady says: "They are selling lies. lies are easy to sell. Truth has the value of the diamond you can't imagine it. but when you realize it's the value you can't believe in lies."

Knight Fonz: "it's true, but we need to give answers to people."

Lady says: "Even though they may question my leadership. but we are not liars. we are not giving them hopes which are built on lies."

Lady adds: "Master always says Be truthful and loyal to people!"

Knight Fonz's feelings didn't match with the lady. He gathers a small team to get to every source that spreads propaganda against the lady.

After a few days,

One young-looking guy came on a horse and tied the horse to the house of Swix unintentionally.

People are staring at the guy. He felt he did something terrible. He didn't know what he did wrong.

The House of Swix always is unguarded. The Lady had roughly two knights, Fonz and Kiar who protected the House. Both have some men under them.

Knight Kiar with his men in Epsilon and Knight Fonz, all men trying to silence the revolt.

The young guy didn't know where to tie the horse so he tied it to the little compound of the house.

He went to the tavern to drink and eat something. He sits down on a chair and orders some food.

There are some fully drunk old guys fighting over the hot topic of Swix under the reign of a lady.

The young guy got pretty much an idea about things getting nervous here. one young man who is a member of the Knight Fonz team named Knight Lyn came to sit at the table.

Knight Lyn says: "you don't look from Swix, are you a foreigner?"

The young guy replied: "I am just wandering around Swix. I am a traveler, hearing and seeing stuff is my hobby and noted down in the book."

Knight Lyn sees at that old man's table says: "they are just old men, just god gave them mouth, so spitting whatever came in their mind. lie, truth doesn't care."

Knight Lyn says: "what you do to live beside the hearing and seeing."

The young guy says: "I am a singer also."

Knight Lyn says: "can you sing something for me. "

The young man says: "I can't, my throat is not well. that's why I came here to Swix from Sxes."

Food arrived on the table.

Knight Lyn says: "Good for you, welcome to the living heaven."

and he lives at the table.

A young guy is a little shocked. murmur in his mind: "not sure for heaven."

He finished his food and straight went to the place where he tied up his horse. He sees a young woman feeding his horse vegetables and water.

He was shocked and fastly went to the horse where he tied and asked her: "why are you feeding my horse."

Lady looked suspiciously: "Is this your Horse?"

He says: "I tied him here and went there."

Lady says: "You didn't look from here."

he says: "no I am not. I live in Sxes/Capital, I am a singer and traveler."

Lady says: "Can we talk in the house? It's a little dark; come for some tea."

He says: "I am fine."

But Lady insists: "you must taste tea, Swix, it's different from Capital."

He agreed.

So, they both walk with each other to the door. As soon as the young guy enters the door lady shuts the door, and keeps the dagger to his neck. It happened so fast that the young guy didn't get time to react. Putting the dagger on his neck. the Lady asks: "Who are you?"

He is still in shock. He says desperately: "I am a singer".

Lady says: "No, you are not, the horse right there is not an ordinary horse, it belongs to some rich family or royal family and your eyes and hair tell different stories. if you are that great singer who owns the royal horse then you must be a rich person or thief who tries to keep his identity secret from Sxes."

She sees the half mark on his hand. (Every Royal family blood creates their Home symbols on their body.) and says: "Also, that mark tells a different story."

Lady loudly says: "So, tell me the truth, another lie you see yourself in your blood."

He is lost in the moment, completely lost in her blue eyes, and didn't even hear a word she says.

Lady tightens her dagger a little.

He wasn't frightened at all and he says: "I am the king of Sxes."

She is in shock once again, tightens the dagger, and says: "is it true?".

His eyes don't have fear of death and say: "I am here to see the lady of Swix. Would you help to find her, where she lives?"

She was confused, the dagger in her hand fell to the ground.

She just doesn't know what to speak, she just scattered.

She still gathers herself and says: "What is the king of Sxes doing here in Swix?"

King Victor says: "To see the lady of Swix, I am impressed by Swix's performance in her reign. I am really surprised that even during last year's worst atmosphere, Swix still took nearly double food and vegetable production than the last year. We already know that this year we are facing a shortage and will begin to send some less food and vegetables to the western kingdom. But Swix proves us wrong. Not only me, but the whole members of Sxes were surprised to see such a performance by Swix."

She still doesn't know how to react. She falls back some steps.

Greet head down and say:" My king, I am the lady of Swix."

by adding the lady says: "my apologies, for rude behavior."

the king got shocked and curiously asked:" are you, the lady of Swix, you are living here in this old house?"

the king expected some sort of palace or something. But it's just an old house.

Lady says: "Yes, this is my home. The House of Swix."

he still does not believe it.

Lady says: "Can you give Swix the opportunity of greeting and serving. The King of Capital/Sxes."

King chuckles and says: "It is the grandest welcome I have ever received in my life."

Lady says: "At least, allow me to serve you dinner."

King says: "no, I am fine, thanks for asking."

He still does not believe there is not a single guard around that house.

Also, Lady had too many questions in her mind and she finally stopped him and the king agreed for dinner.

Lady Livia went to the kitchen to make dinner.

King Victor just wandered around the house and he came in front of the garden near the tree of the carved statue of a lady. He was impressed by the art.

and after some time went, it's nighttime, he went to the small room near the small kitchen with a table capacity of four people. He sat down at the table and Lady served him first and then came to her chair and sat.

he took up a sip of soup and eat the first bite of rice and

King says: "I just tasted the best food of my life."

she didn't hear his voice and she is in her own thoughts.

King interrupts her by some spoon-clashing plate and asks: "I liked the food, it's great food."

Lady says: "Thank you, it's Swix's pleasure to serve the king."

Lady curiously asks: "Can I ask you something?"

King says: "Sure."

Lady says: "Why do you want to meet me?"

King says: "I already tell you the reason, I want to meet a person who completely changed the Swix."

Lady says: "but, still it does not answer my question. why the king took risks and came unguarded in Swix. If the king just orders me, I might have to come to Sxes."

King says: "That's a good summary. There is another reason I came here. to ensure the political stability of Swix."

Lady says: "just for seeing Swix is with or against Sxes. isn't it right?"

King says: "You are smart, aren't you? It's true. These are times where I didn't want to take up any rough action on Epsilon or neither on Swix. Blindly actions may lead to political instability."

Lady says: "You are the king, it doesn't matter what decision it is, it's going to be hard for either Swix or epsilon."

King says: "This is not a place to talk about such topics. It's great food. thank you." and he left.

Lady says: "it's better, better to stay here for the night. it's dark outside and you can't find a trusted place at this time."

He also knows that he didn't feel comfortable living in the hotel/tavern and he says: "thank you, it would be great."

Lady says: "You can sleep in my father's room."

King already knows her and about her family, so he didn't ask about her father and he directly agreed to sleep in her father's room.

He stares at the first room he visits. It's completely well-mannered. He got a little confused about whether he entered the right room or not. but,

Lady pointed to the right and said: "it's the right room."

King was amazed at how small-looking the house was, completely different from the inside.

He is really tired and goes straight to sleep and before that, he says to the lady: "Good Night, Sweet Dreams."

he completely lost his mind on her, continuously thinking about her, complete chaos in his mind going all night. and finally went to sleep for a few hours.

Next day morning,

King hears some strong discussion in the hall (it's placed in a house where all meetings are held.) so he follows the noise. and he has seen a Lady Livia who sat on the throne and spoke with Knight Kiar and with his men. He didn't know who they are. he just walked into the hall or in just a second, he surrounded two to three swords on his neck.

He says in his mind: "Man, Swixan loves the throat."

Lady stands up from the throne.

Knight Kiar says: "Who are you?"

another warrior: "how did you come here?"

another warrior: "are you listening to all things?"

they didn't give him time to speak.

Swords are very close to his neck.

and he says very slowly: "I am the King...of Sxes."

In a second swords get down and all the warriors step back.

Bow at some time.

Lady says: "King of Sxes can you give us a minute to talk privately."

and the king went to the restroom where he slept last night.

Lady and Knight Kiar went to the small private room near the hall.

Lady says: "it's true, Epsilon is not interested in talking."

Knight Kiar says: "they're not even interested to see the letter even."

Lady says: "it didn't feel right."

Knight Kiar says: "Epsilon, don't even consider the people of Swix, they didn't care about us."

Lady says: "It's strong words."

Knight Kiar says: "Is it true the person from the hall is the king of Sxes, are you sure?"

Lady says: "I am not completely sure. but most things look like he might be."

Knight Kiar says: "what things?"

Lady says: "The first thing to consider is the horse he came up with; it's the Royal horse and second thing he had Sxes Royal family mark on his arm."

and the lady also adds: "and the most important his appearance is equally described as King of Sxes and the way he talks he belongs to the Royal family it's clear."

Knight Kiar says: "still? Even though He might be the King is Sxes But, where is his guard?"

Lady says: "it's some internal political issue that's why he came like an unknown person. but now, his security and protection are completely on Swix. It is our top priority."

Knight Kiar says: "That's I understand he is our top priority If he is King of Capital. I need to gather some helpful warriors and it's better to keep it a secret. If anyone knows then it's going to be hard to protect him. Anything that happens to him might lead to war with Capital."

Lady says: "That's why he is our top priority, Discuss with Fonz and later inform me about the arrangement."

Knight Kiar says: "I will, my lady."

Knight Kiar greets and leaves.

Knight Kiar outside meets others and says: "it's our top priority to keep secrets. The person we saw in there is a King of Sxes and protects him at any cost if we fail to do it then there is going to be war. We can't afford a war with the Capital. So do it on top priority and call the best and most trusted people you know. I am going to meet them in the afternoon."

all other warriors agreed.

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POEM 3

FOOTSTEPS searching their MARKS

SANDS refuse to stay in HANDS

WOODS finding their SCAR

CLOUDS still wants to RAIN

BLOOD wants to FLOW

-like we want to ARISE, AWAKE n’ RULE

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Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
IcyFlame
Review
IcyFlame wrote a review Review · Mar 29, 2022

Hi there YP, a very belated welcome to YWS! I hope you've been enjoying the site so far.

I love that you've kicked this one off with a map. I find stories set in alternate worlds can be hard to follow because we've no reference of the land or of the lore that's gone into the world. Having a map to flick back to can just help keep everything a bit clearer, especially as the story progresses.

I found it interesting that every time you introduce a new character, you put their name in bold. Is this because you're planning to include a kind of character encyclopedia in a similar form to the Song of Ice and Fire series? If so I think that makes sense, but otherwise it's a bit of an odd stylistic choice.

On the way to the hallway passage, Commander Brock met Master Ari.

The two are going to a meeting organized by the king.

Watch your tenses here. The first sentence is past, the second present.

The way in which you format the dialogue is also very odd, and reads almost like a script. Because of this, we don't get much in the way of variety when it comes to dialogue tags and I think that's a shame. Dialogue tags can go a way in terms of characterisation because they tell us how a character speaks and how they react to others. Is this a deliberate choice you've made here? If there's not a clear reason for it, I would revert to more traditional styles because they're both easier to read but also allow that more in depth exploration of characters.

I think the plot progresses at a good pace here, although there are some times where your exposition gives the same information as a character does through speech and I don't think doubling up is really needed.

There is a whole lot of conversation here, and it can get a little heavy. I'd suggest throwing some more description in here and exploring how your characters might be feeling just to give a bit more depth to the chapter.

Happy Tuesday!

Icy

User avatar
Horisun
Review
Horisun wrote a review Review · Jan 9, 2022

Hey! I hope this review finds you well!
First things first, sick map dude! Not only does it look great, but it's actually really useful when referencing the different Kingdoms. I assume you made it yourself, and if so, props to you!
Actually, you've might've heard of it, but I've been using this one website for my own map creations called Inkarnate. (I will say, I generally prefer drawing my own maps, but it's super fun to mess around with)
Onto the review proper; as always, you've nailed the character dialogue, and Livia continues to be by far my favorite character. And seeing her point that knife at the Kings throat, when we the reader know who each individual character is a prime example of dramatic irony and an excellent use of third-person omniscient. Fantastic job with that!
Beyond that, I really liked how you established King Aces desire to destroy the wall, then brought it back this chapter. I'm glad him declaring war didn't happen immediately after the fact, and it was given time to fester. Nice setup and execution!
All and all, I'm very invested in the story so far, and I think you're improving with every chapter!
I do have a few small critics you may wish to note, however;
Well I noticed that you distributed information in this chapter really well compared to the previous two (Excellent job there, by the way!) one line in particular-
"She sees the half mark on his hand. (Every Royal family blood creates their Home symbols on their body.) and says: "Also, that mark tells a different story.""
-felt a tad clunky relative to the rest. I would suggest reordering it slightly, and cutting the parentheses out.
"She glares at me, "That mark tells a different story."' he hurries to cover his hand, but it's too late for that, "Every member of the royal family has one.""
This is just an example, and a far from perfect one at that, but changing it this aways allows it to flow a tad better. Having it come from the characters makes it a little more natural than what feels like the author interjecting the information in the middle of a scene.
I did also note that you tend to repeat information here and there. For example, in the opening paragraph, you (the author) state;

"The two are going to a meeting organized by the king."

This is directly followed by a conversation between Commander Brock and Master Ari;

""Master, are you also heading toward the meeting hall.""
""Yes, commander, I think you were also summoned for the meeting.""

Because both the line from you, and the lines from the characters are essentially conveying the same information, you could cut out the former and tweak the latter to improve the opening paragraph.

Another example of this is Knight Kiars dialogue at the end of the chapter. In the first paragraph, he states that he needs warriors who will keep the Kings presence a secret. Three sentences later, he states that he needs warriors who will keep the Kings presence a secret. Though it is entirely up to you, I would recommend cutting the latter half, and perhaps replacing it with something else. Perhaps Livia being left alone in the room, contemplating her perilous position? Or something else entirely?
However, this part is mostly subjective, and you may simply wish to leave it as is.

In conclusion, though we are but three chapters in, I believe this was the best chapter yet! I'm so excited how all the plot threads start twining together. I'm especially curious about what may happen if the war begins, and the king is absent from the capitol. I wonder how the people he left behind will deal with it, if such a thing occurs.
Genuinely cannot see where you take this. I was on the edge of my seat reading it all the way through, and can't at all predict what may happen in the next chapter. Keep on writing, and have a wonderful day! :D

YP@17 replied · Jan 9, 2022

Thanx !! for review, once again very useful, will try to work on things that you mentioned.

Thank u.



It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.
— Mark Twain