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Lovely Assassin Letters (7)

by WishIHadASword

     No. This had to be fake.

     Blake loved her. And Blake was going to die.

     Amanda sobbed and screamed, ignoring the salty ocean water and coarse sand from the deserted beach that ruined her clothing. Her wavy hair stuck to her tear-streaked cheeks and she hugged her knees close to her chest. It felt like a knife was being slowly twisted in her chest—how could anyone live with pain like this?

     It didn’t help that she really did love Blake. It felt a little like she was breaking a rule, considering he was both her best friend and an assassin. But how could she not? Every reason seemed stupid now, but they were bittersweet memories.

     There were the four years—ever since eighth grade—that he’d helped her with homework. Amanda probably owed every A to him. Then of course the late nights when he’d sneak over to her house just because she was lonely while her parents were on trips and her sister was in college. Blake always made sure she was separate from his career, and though he never said it out loud, she could tell he was constantly worried about exposing her to something so dark. He even warned her about her ex-boyfriend Derin, who he knew would be a jerk before she did. But it was the small things too. He would go to school events with her even though he thought they were stupid, he would walk with her to each class, and he never failed to tell her good morning.

     Now he’d never tell her good morning again.

     She choked out sharp breaths of air, feeling lost and hopeless. Amanda wanted more than anything to help or stop what was going on, but nothing she could do would help. Blake was too stubborn, his job was too dangerous, and he was too far away. It was probably too late—and that thought didn’t help.

     But…no good was going to come from sitting and crying. That was a lesson her mother had taught her from a young age. So Amanda wiped her tears and her runny nose, let out a shaky breath, and stood up on her weak legs. Maybe she couldn’t stop Blake, but she could definitely make sure he didn’t go in vain. It might’ve been crazy, but she was going to book a flight to Europe. And then Amanda was going to give Blake’s assassin agency a piece of my mind.

     At that moment, she didn’t care too much about dying. At that point, living didn’t feel so great anyway. And she didn’t care if it was stupid or psychotic for one eighteen-year-old girl to pick a fight with highly-trained assassins. It wasn’t right to kill Blake just because he’s broken protocol going after that killer.

     But then again…what if his agency didn’t kill him? What if he died trying to bring the serial killer to justice? That stupid boy—going against his organization's wishes because of one little girl out of dozens of victims. That only added to the list of reasons why she loved him, though. But how was she supposed to get revenge? If Blake hadn’t been able to kill that murderer, she certainly wouldn’t be able to. She already got a little queasy around blood, she didn’t know how to use any weapons, and she didn’t know if she could ever bring herself to kill someone—even a heartless criminal.

     But that was a problem for future Amanda. In the meantime, she needed to travel to Europe and find out more. After all, it seemed awfully fitting to avenge an assassin by becoming one.

The End..For Now!


Hey, thank you so much for reading and sticking through until the end, I really hope you enjoyed! If you liked these letters at all, you'll really enjoy the book that follows it, "Assassin's Heart," which features Amanda's adventure while trying to find out the details of Blake's death, and is published in my portfolio! Thanks, have an awesome day/night/etc!

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41 Reviews

Points: 1243
Reviews: 41

Sat Jul 23, 2022 11:12 am
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PaigeFantasy wrote a review...

hi, im sure you recognize me. i’ve just taken some time to reread this before reading Assassin’s Heart. and i’ll make a review for the end here. :)
from the last few chapters altogether, the mood changed fast. i like the emotion expressed, i feel like it adds more to her character. is she basically becoming an assassin or just getting revenge? either way i love it.
some sentences are perhaps a little off, but really that’s it. :)
to this day, one year later, i still love this story, and im SO reading the sequel. great job. :)

Hey, thanks a gazillion! I'm glad you're reading and enjoying, you're boosting my self esteem like x10 %uD83D%uDE02

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127 Reviews

Points: 12740
Reviews: 127

Wed Jun 29, 2022 2:52 am
Spearmint wrote a review...

Hii, it's mint, here with a review! ^-^ I just came from Chapter 7 of Assassin's Heart, which reminded me that I hadn't finished reading these Lovely Assassin Letters yet! And honestly, I regret not reading them earlier, because they're amazing-- I could really get a sense of each character's personality from their letters. (Amanda's sparkly pink envelope was a nice touch. xD) Also, now it makes a lot more sense why Amanda would join a group of assassins; through these letters, I was able to tell how much she cares for Blake. So yeah, overall, these letters were a delight to read, and they provided helpful information about each character! C:

As for my thoughts on this part specifically, I was rather caught off guard by the first-person. I think changing it to third-person (though Amanda's thoughts can be written in first-person) would be more consistent, though it's a small thing! ^^'

Like Mailice mentioned, it's great how Amanda's thought process is shown! I can tell that she's someone who can make a goal and go right for it. I do agree with Mailice that this part could have been slowed down a little, though-- perhaps Amanda could come to a gradual realization, or a realization could be sparked by something she sees or remembers, instead of her quickly deciding to book a flight and become an assassin. But I'm not sure if it would make this part better, actually, because I like how you show that Amanda is a proactive person, and deciding to book a flight fits her bold, strong-willed personality (and also reflects her impulsivity following Blake's most recent letter). So yeah, just a thought. :]

I placed my face into my hands as sobs racked my whole body. I choked out sharp breaths of air, and I felt so lost. I wanted to do something, but I knew there was nothing I could ever do to stop this.

Hmm... here, short and kinda choppy sentences might be a choice (to set the mood to desperation or something), but I wonder how it'd sound with longer sentences? Like maybe if the face-in-hands, sobs, and sharp breaths parts were one sentence, and lost, wanting to do something, and knowing there was nothing to do were another sentence? Totally optional, though-- it's great as it is. :]

Blake was too stubborn, his job was too dangerous, and he was too far away.

Man, that's a powerful sentence. I could really feel the hopelessness of the situation. :')

At this point, I had nothing left to live for.

While the previous letters do give the reader a sense of Blake's importance to Amanda, I still think a little more detail here would be nice. Why was Blake so essential to Amanda's life that without him, she felt like she had nothing? (Like, more specifically than she loved him-- what was something in particular that caused her to love him?)

And what better way to avenge an assassin than to become one?

Ooh... and that's a neat sentence that hints at her adventures to come... ;)

Thanks for these lovely letters (both in name and in quality!) and I'll be sure to review Chapter 7 soon! Keep writing, and have a fabulous day/night! =D

Thank bunches!! I do know I need to fix this up a little bit, and your feedback helps a lot! I orginally wrote this a year or two ago so I think I can make it a little better now. You're a huge help, thanks for supporting all my writing ;)

Spearmint says...

Of course! Thanks for writing these beautiful letters and chapters! ^-^ <3

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1230 Reviews

Points: 121738
Reviews: 1230

Thu Apr 15, 2021 1:56 pm
MailicedeNamedy wrote a review...

Hi WishIHadASword,

Mailice here with a short review! :D

I think it's a shame that the story is coming to an end now. I really expected the big suspense to start now, and you get an insight into Blake's job.

I wouldn't describe your writing right now as "super crappy", but in a wild rush that meets the grief of a young woman who is in love and doesn't know what else the big, wide world has to offer. She clings to the only stalk she knows, hoping to minimise her grief by "taking revenge" on the Agency. I think that sums up the text well.

You can see the clear comparison here between Amanda's letters and her character, that she thinks exactly as she writes, which I think is good that one can spot. It seems a little hectic and rushed in places where you could perhaps expand a little. Still, it's easy to follow Amanda's thought processes and I also think her naivety is very well portrayed here.

One suggestion that comes to mind to make this text a little different from the letters is to write it from the third person, so that you can add a little description of exactly where Amanda is sitting (I wouldn't put it in the first person description, for example, because she is too much in mourning right now and probably can't see clearly because of all the tears). But I think that would just add a little too much to the overall drama.

(Author's Note: There are many better ways my dear, MANY).

I don't know here if you're trying to drag yourself down with this and think the writing is bad, or if it's a note from the " over-narrator" condemning Amanda's idea of becoming an assassin herself.

The End. For now...

Oh, that gives me hope that there will be another sequel, with Amanda as the "protagonist". Maybe you can make a new story out of it, where she travels through Europe looking for Blake. :D

Have fun with the writing!


Thanks so much for the wonderful review! And yes indeed, I'm about two chapters into a sequel with Amanda as the main character (which is in 3rd person, so that's nice!). And yes haha, my author's note was just me making fun of myself a bit. You're the sweetest, thank you for all the support!

Too often we crave the extraordinary in life, without even learning how to cherish the ordinary first. Friend, I promise you this: if you can learn to take joy in the simple mundane things in life, the extraordinary will take care of itself, it'll be on its way, hurrying towards you. But if you skip the first part, it'll ever evade you.
— Arcticus