Amanda Charlotte
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San Diego, CA
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No time for introductions. This is serious.
It has taken months for me to respond, yes, I know. I've been extremely busy with my job, and I'm keeping track of one of the most violent killers I've seen in my life. I must focus. But there are things I need to say...
Mandy, I am not going to get out of this alive. It's going against my orders to hunt down this fiend, but I must do so. This man has already killed so many people, which is expected, but that's not as much what angered me as was his most recent murder. He killed an innocent young girl. A small little girl that always plays on the slide outside my apartments. He killed her. And now I will die trying to dispose of him, or I shall succeed and be slaughtered by my own organization for going against the boss's commands.
I'm so sorry. For everything. I wish I could've protected you from the emotional and mental stress of being friends with someone like me. I feel absolutely horrid. But as selfish as it may be...I have something to admit.
I'm in love with you Amanda Charlotte. I have been for a very long time. I don't deserve you, and I am an awful person. I've ruined your life. And this is why I am telling you this now, before my ending. Because now you don't have to deal with me anymore. Or maybe it's because I'm a coward...couldn't even face you and tell you how I feel. But I love you so much. I love your voice and your laugh. You're the smartest and most kind person I have ever met. I'm sorry. And although it's a cruel, awful request...
Don't forget me.
Love,
Blake
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125,027 Literary Works • 672,774 Reviews
Hey WishIHadASword!
Wow! This letter has a completely different character from the rest so far...the others were playful and funny, but this is blunt, yet emotional. You've really captured the feelings of someone who has numbered days left to live very well
The Blake being in love with Amanda stuff...I expected it at some point, and I gotta say, you carried it off without getting too lovey-dovey. Great going!
This paragraph is so emotionally raw...It's beautiful:
I'm so sorry. For everything. I wish I could've protected you from the emotional and mental stress of being friends with someone like me. I feel absolutely horrid. But as selfish as it may be...I have something to admit.
On the whole, I loved the letter. I can't wait to see what happens next.
Keep writing.
(PS: This is an earnest request from a fan. Don't kill Blake. Please)
Thank you so so much! And I'll try my best to keep Blake alive for ya
hi again, just finished reading this and the last one and...THEY ARE SO GOOD! you’re writing style is amazing.
there is slight more violence in this chapter but that just adds more to the story, and I like it!
please keep on writing, I bet your future stories will be AMAZING.
Thank you so much, you're so sweet!
Hi WishIHadASword!
Mailice back with a new review!
Wow. I think that sums up the whole letter very well. While the last ones were lovely and beautiful, this relationship seems to have gone from a paradise dream to a nightmare.
I think it's good that Blake is quite honest about it, and gets straight to the point. Again, a good expansion of his personality to be very direct, except for his feelings, which I think he mentions in passing in the last paragraph, and yet you really notice the fear he has, how he also describes himself as a coward.
You really build up a very good arc of suspense here, which also puts the previous letters in a new light. Who exactly was this little girl? What is this organisation that Blake works for? It really is like going from 0 to 100, which is what I like about this letter in particular.
Here I'm a little confused because later it mentions that he killed this little girl. But I assume this killer has a lot more people on his conscience than just the girl and I think you could have expanded on that a bit here. Maybe just mention it briefly, like "He's killed so many people you can't even list them all" or something.
Putting her whole name in here was a very good point, that kind of emphasises again how serious Blake is and how nervous he is about his job. And you also really leave us with a cliffhanger here about how now Amanda reacts to it!
A really great letter and I'm very curious to see how everything will develop. Keep up this style!
Mailice.
Thanks a bunch, friend! I'm going to tweak this to make it a bit better, I appreciate the suggestions and compliments!