Light soars through the windows
in the 300 hallway,
shining and shimmering
and going right through me as if I
was
never
there.
In class
my mouth is glued shut
anxiety thrumming behind
my furrowed brow.
I take notes
and take tests
never raising my hand
or volunteering to speak
even when I know that I know every answer.
The students in my class talk over me,
speaking freely--
not caring
not seeing
that someone is there
hearing every secret and every story
they tell their friends.
I'm just invisible.
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Canary word: Present
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,805 Reviews
Hello, yes! I love this poem because it is so simple yet says so much.
I feel as though a lot of people now can relate to this more than ever.
I relate to this now more than ever. I sometimes feel as though I was never there, simply a forgotten memory. It can be difficult. Stay strong, love.
Hey! Forever here with a short review!!
I think this was a great and very relatable poem. I do know how it really feels when someone doesn't care about us. So, let's get right into it.
I loved how you managed to portray the theme of ignorance in the poem. I do think that it is the habit of people being ignorant about others and people who they don't know. Also, I found a feeling of great introversion in this poem. If I am not wrong, it's the narrator's introversion that kept them away from talking freely with others. And um... They are a bit reticent too, I guess?
Okay. But does this contribute to the fact that the person is invisible? Like light can even pass easily through visible things if they are transparent. And I do assume that the person is not open minded. So, maybe this comparison is not the bwst one one would expect. I would likw to hear your view on this very thing.
Well, this is a very sad situation here. It helps in bringing out the extreme introversion of the person. I wonder if the person even answers to question, I mean if the teacher asks them. One thing that I liked here is the fact their brain is always in action when they are in class. And although they have anxiety, they are attentive in class.
This is even more sad than the second stanza. I think the people around this person don't care about the person. They tend to be extroverted and don't understand the introverts. In this stanza, the matter of invisibility is very well brought out.
I think you can actually divide the poem in stanzas. Because there are parts based on different things, it would not hurt to divide the poem in stanzas. Overall, I think the imagery was great and the topic too was amazing.
Keep Writing!!
~Forever
This was an excellent poem! I can completely relate to it, which is important for me in a poem. I love it when they are about deep feelings I can relate to.
First off, the imagery, amazing! I don’t think it could have been much better.
Second, the flow. It is also near flawless!!
Excellent job <3
Good afternoon! I really enjoyed reading this poem of yours! Straight off the bat, your imagery is absolutely fantastic. The opening stanza sets the scene perfectly, not only describing the setting, but also establishing the main theme of the piece. Absolutely excellent work!
And the ensuing lines do not disappoint! I was enthralled from start to finish. Though I cannot quite place why, the lines;
"The students in my class talk over me, speaking freely, not caring, not seeing, that someone is there."
Honestly, this entire poem just flows together flawlessly. Though I myself am usually more partial to rhyming schemes and the like, something about this piece just works. Excellent job!
If I had to find something to nitpick, I did feel that the line;
"hearing every secret and story and problem and hint of gossip"
felt a tad out of place. This may just be me, but I think it was a tad too long. Maybe consider cutting it down a bit!
Overall, however, this was an excellent poem! I look forward to reading more from you in the future! Keep on writing, and have a wonderful day!