Young Writers Society

I feel the emotion wrecking through this person. Like it seems that it is so painful, but she/he seems to be ok. That just makes me happy when she/he is like don't make big promises just give me what youcan which happens to be just tonight. I love the fact that the character is actually very realistic and not just like promise me everything, even though I know it probably would not work out and I am going to probably be emotionally damaged. The character doesn't have high expectations and that just makes my brain want to dig more information than is actually there dear god, Am I turning into an English teacher? (I'm just kidding that is totally an English teacher thing to do though). Grammatically I think your poem is good, but most poems do not have the one sentence stanzas, but I also feel like it just adds to the drama and emotion behind the poem. And then I look back and read like twice more I just realized in your third stanza it's not parallel be cause the fourth line you have a capital letter, so I would make that a different stanza or I think add a period before-hand or just do not you do you boo. Your poem was amazing and just keep up the amazing work.

Ooh I really like this. Very nice.

I'm going to be that person to say that this reminds me so much of Before Sunset trilogy. Nothing wrong with that, just an observation really. And I also wanted to point out that, the transition from

and let the night stretch out before us

then suddenly
it ends

Hey Onii-Chan here!

I see you wrote a love poem :3 cute!
I feel like this poem would be something out of a love song, which is great, yet it just doesn’t feel as poetic as it should be. I love the story it tells, though. Normally rhymes come in repeated patterns, but on this it feels like the rhymes are all over the place. Another thing (omigosh sorry) is that the spacing in between feels weird, but it’s kinda cool. Good job on this poem, keep on improving!

Keep on writing!