Well, aren't you a hero?...
Tears have been shed for you, son.
Hearts have bled from the battles you 'won'
and there is no time to remember the fun
times banished to sulk past a dusky red sun.
Thorn in foot, tongue in cheek,
allowed to part the 'righteous' and meek;
allowed to label lies with an odour, it reeks
of 'salvation' and tobacco that peeks
through flared nostrils, and a deathly glare,
now it seems that nobody cares
for your explanations; they just stand and stare,
and stop. That's enough.
So I can't have you back.
I'll just settle for that.
I won't apologise for the most sincere of lies.
I won't let you scrutinize any chance of reprise.
I'll never forget. I'll never think twice,
so this is my last word. Goodnight.
((OMG! It rhymes!!!))
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139,436 Literary Works • 672,563 Reviews
I liked reading your work... I specially loved the ending... It forms a detailed picture and that's the thing I liked about it the most... Keep writing...
Cool,it does rhyme very good.I love the way it sounds.
This was fairly good. I can catch the emotion you were going for. I would suggest adding some commas, though, or else it sounds a bit choppy.
That had to be my favorite part. For some reason, this just spoke to me more than any other part of the poem.
Well done.
I liked this poem, I felt that the rhyming was a bit weird in the first stanza, but that can be fixed. I loved the rhyming and the language used in the second stanza aswell. I liked this poem because it was very straight to the point. You used great imagry and I loved the kind of sing song way in which it came across to me. The narrator didn't seem upset, to me they seemed kind of, hurried and angry. I think you have somethng really good here. Keep at it, I know you will do great
xx Matt