He broke my heart not long ago.
He moved on, faster than the wind blow.
I admit, I got devoured by agony;
But now that I rose, I got back my sanity.
-
I cannot believe I wasted my sleepless nights;
Thinking about what we had, including the fights.
And it's hilarious to see you with another girl.
Whose toying you secretly, as your heart twirl.
-
Poor boy, drunk in love.
Whose heart is kept in a glove.
Stupidity and pathetic misery you have ahead of you;
Do you actually think you can handle this through?
-
Just don't come up crying to me, It's pathetic.
I don't need you anymore and for me, it's aesthetic.
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125,010 Literary Works • 672,839 Reviews
Nice, that's a great way to get over an ex, write a poem and slam him or her.
Okay, nitpick time. I understand you were trying to make every line rhyme, but the second line of the first stanza could be changed so you don't have to say "wind blow" without the plural. Just a suggestion but it could be "He moved on, faster than the water's flow" or "faster than the river's flow." It still rhymes and a lot of rivers are rapids. I love the first two lines of the second stanza, but I think you really should change "twirl", in the last line, to "twirls." For lack of a better solution. Other than that, I love the poem entirely, she's over it,s he's ready to be mad and has everything planned out if he comes back begging.
This is kind of interesting, it is interesting how you seem to building up as you go through the poem and you slowly start to get it more intense, it does keep the reader wanting more and it helps them understand how you felt or feel if I am correct?
Anyway it was good mostly except for this bit I thought it let it down slightly
Whose heart is kept in a glove.
Its sought of ruins it, I know your trying to rhyme but there might be batter word that could be rhymed with love such as 'curve' or well that sounds like it to me.
I hope this helped, I think though with a few tweaks this poem would be really good.
Jack.