Mirrors

Hiya Zhia ! (welll, wow, that rhymed )

That one was short and crisp and meaningful. Introspective somehow, I believe. I admire your writing style. the message came along really strong. This reminds me of a poem that i wrote, and was thinking of uploading. haha ! happy to see that our thoughts crossed.

Keep posted girl. way to go

Regards
Bipasha

Hiya Zhia ! (welll, wow, that rhymed )

That one was short and crisp and meaningful. Introspective somehow, I believe. I admire your writing style. the message came along really strong. This reminds me of a poem that i wrote, and was thinking of uploading. haha ! happy to see that our thoughts crossed.

Keep posted girl. way to go

Regards
Bipasha

Hello CapitalMonday here for a review. I would like to begin on how well-written this poem is since i believe that many people could relate to what you are saying. We all had someone call us fat or ugly and then we cry away the pain by looking at a mirror and seeing that what this person had said was true.

When i look at this poem, i don't see any mistake since from the comments below i would think that you have fixed some of them. Also (i might ramble) but this kinds relates to me since forever i feel like everyone is talking about how ugly i am or how dumb i am behind my back. They also act so nice and friendly when really they were talking horrible about me. Now as I read this poem, it makes me feel the same/rethink about my life or go back a relive what had happened to me.

Now, sorry about the rambling above but that's my way of saying how an amazing writer you are at these poems i have read. Also i like to point out that in this poem the conflict of the outside world (man vs. society) is amazing since i do love to write something to do with something like this.

Farewell,
CapitalMonday

i love this i cried in the first two SENTENCES. dang you're powerful

Personally, I like this one considerably more than the Ode. You contain a lot of feeling in these two stanzas; it's very powerful. I was going to comment that the beginning stanza felt a little off beat, but I think that actually adds and fits with the piece, like it reflects how wrong it was for the 'you' to call the narrator all those terrible things and gives it an even more dramatic feel.
I think there's a lot of truth in this poem: that how you see and interact with the world reflects who you are. (At least that's my interpretation of the theme.) It definitely leaves the reader a lot to dwell on.
My one critique is there could be a bit more imagery. In the second stanza you have the beautiful stuff about the tear, but there's not much in the first stanza. There doesn't necessarily need to be a lot of imagery; it's beautiful the way it is, but it might add a bit, I don't know.
I really like how the poem is told in past tense, like the narrator doesn't have anything to do with the 'you' character; she/he used to care so much what the 'you' thought of them and now the 'you' seems to appear to the narrator as someone to be pitied rather than agonized over (again, this is my interpretation of the poem; I hope it doesn't depart too far from yours).
That's all I got. Wish I could give you some better advice because I really like the poem. Hope this helped anyways!
-alliyah

This poem is so cool in the way that is from a comeback that I heard and I am pretty sure that you heard it. I love how many poems are made. Some from inspiration and some just pop into your head for no reason. I was once bullied for 4 years and I always thought they were just being rude and mean. This poem made me realize the truth that they are just a mirror and that they are just saying that to make you sad. Your imagery is very good and I like how you italicized what, drop and believed for emotion.
Something that you can improve on is your organization. You can improve how you order your stanzas. Have them have topics. For example on could be on how they made you sad. Another on how you reacted. The last on could be on what you realize. I also think that you can elaborate on what they realized. You could have a little more imagery there. You could have their heart raising and them being happy, ect.
This is a great piece and be sure to make more like this. Have a good day.

Hello! ^^ Seb here for a review

Wow. Wow, this is a very powerful piece. It's honest, it's powerful, it's meaningful. You have my complete admiration.

I'm not sure if you intentionally didn't put this into stanzas or if it was an accident. It was probably an accident, but I do like it. Then again, if I saw it with stanzas I would probably like it that way too.

I really enjoyed the repetition you had in this piece. I'm not going to point out specific examples, but do know that I like the repetition.

Because everything you say

Reflects who you are.

What you are.

And I cried that night

With silent tears.

A little drop

Was all that could be heard.

Until I thought

And realized

That all you said,

That all you thought,

All you believed,

Was a mirror.

* pads in* Good Murrow Good writer and May I begin this review, Fallen here so lets get started. First off The power in this poem was amazing and beautiful it held an eerie saddening tone that made the reader long to aid the speaker in the struggle with the mirror and the speaker and the feelings that they both hold. I enjoyed deeply how you gave the mirror human charcstics and remarks that it showed/told the speaker it helped emphasize the speakers point. Or another inference could be that the mirror is showing the speaker there true self and how miserable and awful they truly are, Whether that or some other reason/reasoning of the poem I quite enjoyed it. Your imagery and word choice were amazing and aided the speaker in there point Well done and keep it up
~Fallen

Hey, I am writing this as a review, so I hope you don't mind. Don't worry, I'm not doing it for points. I'm really not because of how much I love this poem you have written. We reflect to our mirrors, but there are times when our mirrors show us what kind of people we really turn out to be. If I'm misinterpreting this, then I'm sorry, it's just that this reminds me of what I'm trying to imply. But I really like this poem, so keep writing until the very end Zhia!

Zhia,

Wow, I really like this! Coincidentally, I posted a poem/story here with the same title! #twinning ! Moving on, I love the imagery you portrayed here, the feelings you emitted, coming all together to the realization that you've become a mirror of all the things that have been said to you.

My suggestions are at "When you told me that I was horrible." I think would roll more smoothly with a comma instead of a period.

Also,
"With silent tears.

A little drop"

Maybe change 'tears' to 'sobs' because when you think tears, you see drops. This give it a more despererate or helpless feel at I think you were aiming towards in that portion.

Both your final decisions though

Great job. Keep expressing <3

-Percybeth