"I'm not depressed," I told my mom and doc,
But I wasn't being honest today.
It's been 2 months since you are gone,
And I'm not the same Hazel Grace.
Isaac is grateful to be blind
In a world where you don't exist,
And my life got emptied,
The moment you were buried.
I dare not reread 'An Imperial Affliction',
Because I freeze and shiver at the try,
Unhealthy silence, stillness and suffocation,
Lost in halo of regrets, I sigh.
Metaphors lost their playfulness
And their meanings fade away,
Genie wishes once used,
Became a painful memory that I would never forget.
You don't know how many times
I craved to light your cigarettes,
When Christmas hurt me more than my lungs,
One look at the tree was enough for me to end up in a hospital.
I never got to tell you how much you meant to me,
So here I am,
Writing letters that you will never read.
I guess it was the fault in our stars that led us to this fate,
But if the stars align,
Let's meet again,
And complete the story that we never got to create.
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,781 Reviews
a good way to release pains in the heart
by sharing with the reader
you share your pain leaving us in emotional
the best way to pour worries and pains into writing
a great poem
Thankyou!!
This story reflects a sad thing that follows a breakup, showing how the person can be affected to the point where they don't even feel like the same person anymore. Emphasizing a deep longing and a deep, wanting for things to be better, more things to be different. This is the story that many have heard before and many have experienced. Well done on putting it on paper.
Thankyou!!!
Your poem resonates with such raw emotion and honesty. The way you express your grief and the profound impact of loss is deeply moving. It's clear that you're grappling with the absence of someone dearly missed, someone who shaped your world in ways that now feel irreplaceable.
The references to 'An Imperial Affliction', the longing to share moments like lighting cigarettes, and the pain of facing Christmas without them—all evoke a profound sense of emptiness and yearning. Your words paint a picture of how loss can permeate every aspect of life, casting shadows on once joyful memories and turning everyday moments into painful reminders.
The line "Writing letters that you will never read" captures the heartache of unspoken words and unfinished conversations, highlighting the finality of your loss. Yet, amidst the sorrow, there's a glimmer of hope in your closing lines—a hope to meet again under better stars, to complete the story that fate cut short.
Your poem is a beautiful tribute to the person you've lost and a testament to the power of love and memory. Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt piece.
GOOD JOB!
Hello! Thank you for your review. I'm so glad that you liked it <3
Hey friend
Wow, I really loved this poem and I wanted to leave a quick review:
I absolutely loved this part. We normally associate blindness as being something that can be disabling to a persons life, but here you represent it as being a gift. I like how you twist these opposites to explain a feeling associated with loss and longing and heart ache. Whether this is literal visual blindness or cluelessness, it is still very impactful.
I liked the combination of your more symbolic lines combined with straightforward lines line this. It short of shocked me back to the present and what I am reading, from a past reflection and emotional letter, to a present factual statement.
And I loved how you ended it:
I like how you mentioned stars aligning and end with this little bit of hope. Thank you for sharing this. It was very lovely <33
Your friend,
Ellie
Hey Ellie! Thank you so much for reading my poem, glad you liked it! <3
Nice work done by the author.
"And I'm not the same Hazel Grace.
Isaac is grateful to be blind
In a world where you don't exist,
And my life got emptied,
The moment you were buried."
The girl explains how sad and lonely she feels after her loved one left her. She feels that it would be better for her to get blind like her other friend (Isaac) because she would not have to look around without her loved one being beside her.
The lines are well written, it feels like I am talking to Hazel right now, and she is telling me about all the gloominess she is facing.
"I guess it was the fault in our stars that led us to this fate,
But if the stars align,
Let's meet again,
And complete the story that we never got to create."
The author ends the poem with hope. Hope about how Hazel still feels the story did not end and she can continue and 'create' it further. Maybe not today or maybe not in this lifetime, but someday she will meet him/her again.
This is a very great piece of poetry but I somewhere feel that it could be more lyrical. Anyways it was amazing and I wish it had a 'Part 2' also.
Keep it up.
Waiting for more.
Thank you.
Hello! I did kind of mess up with the rhyme scheme since I wanted to mention references from the book somewhat accurately but I'll be careful of it next time. And compiling Hazel's feelings in one small poem felt impossible! I might do a part 2 also because there are so many emotions to cover. Thank you for your review <3
My pleasure. And I am waiting for 'part 2', I guess it will be awesome.
Hi names 22Midnight
hope your doing well, let's get into it!
First Impression: Due to the title I was either thinking that this would be about a loved one that died or someone who was really angry at there ex or family member who never really listens to them when they speak, I'm really curious to find out what it's really about though, and I definitely think that the title draws you in a lot.
this is a really beautiful but sad way to start the poem, and it quickly made me realize what it was about as well, I can already see that the person who's speaking is really struggling from a massive loss in there family, and there finding it hard maybe to talk to anybody around them about it.
I find this part a little jumbled together and a lot harder to understand, I think all the lines are really well written but I think there just not fitting together quite right and it makes it hard to read, maybe try putting them in a different order or adding more lands to make it work better.
This is so sad I kind of thought as I was reading this I thought that maybe you could write a story where the person that died resurrects, because it sounded so sad and I just wanted to make the person who was writing this happy by bringing the loved one back.
Overall: I really did like the way that you wrote this it was wonderfully written and I'm sure with some slight changes and edits it will be even more beautiful then it already is, you got me to feel really sorry for the character writing this as well, so overall it was really well done
anyway that's it from me
hope you have a great dawn/dusk/midnight
See Ya
Hello! Thanks for your review
I wrote the poem based on a book called The fault in our stars and the book definitely gave me quite a shock when one of the character died. The part where you got confused was written with references from the book and how they became painful memory for her because is no longer with her. I tried really hard to end the poem on a positive note but I just couldn't think of anything but the current end :'(
Hey, Semicolon! I'm Wist and I'm here to review this lovely poem.
As someone who is a fan of The Fault in Our Stars, I found this poem to be a great representation of what Hazel would feel during this time of her life. I love all the references to the novel/film and how genuine it feels. One thing I'm confused about is if this poem is supposed to rhyme. The first stanza has an abab rhyme scheme, but the second stanza is cdee. The first stanza could be an accident, but if it's not, the rhyme scheme is all over the place and is very confusing to track. With that said, let's get into it.
These lines are my favorite. It centers around the key aspects of the novel, framing things that Hazel loved about Augustus as tragic reminders of the love she lost. It's a great representation of how loss can turn even the happiest things tragic and too hard to remember.
This ending is so tragic. You know that the only way for them to meet is for Hazel to die and join Augustus, so adding another reason for her to be looking forward to death shows the hopelessness of her situation. The whole thing is a shame.
Overall, my main advice would be to fix your rhyme scheme. Based on the fact that Stanza three has a fgfg rhyme scheme, I'm assuming that your desired pattern is something closer to a sonnet: abab cdcd efef, etc. So, I would spend some time adjusting that. Other than that, the references to the source material were tied in well and the tragedy was potent. Good work! Thanks for publishing; I enjoyed reading.
Happy Writing!
Wist
Hello Wist and thank you for reading my poem! Yes, I definitely struggled with my rhyme scheme while writing because I also wanted to involve references from the book so it did get a little messy there. I'll take care of it next time if I happen to write a poem with context to book. Thanks again for your review <3