The wind moans through the trees, mourning in the wake of our leave.
The sun kisses us goodbye one last time before departing to places unknown.
The clouds' dark faces bunch while they cut swiftly across the sky, trying to hide their tears.
A few fall anyway, being swiped away with a careless dash of the windshield wipers.
In the soft earth, our footsteps mirror the confused chaos of our lives and a sudden farewell.
Imprinted in the dirt and moss, is the evidence that we were once here, spirited and alive.
Oh, so very much alive.
And the trees seem to twist in the breeze, as if whispering amongst themselves as they strain for just one last glimpse.
Spring flowers cluster together, the splash of water spinning from our tires drowning them from their stalks up.
Have we forgotten who will take care of them? Who will prune the roses and tend the irises? Or are they just another casualty as we move on down the line?
The few leftover fall leaves, brown and fragilely crinkled, toss and tumble in the gutter as we pass by.
They seem to be trying to follow in a desperate wish to live again, free with the misty breeze.
The road winds, drawing us farther away, yet trying to hold us back as we slow for every curve.
The closer we get to our destination the harder the past is to remember.
We forget the lessons learned, how we overcame the roadblocks that once threatened what we struggled so hard to obtain.
We forget where we came from, what got us here, and instead obsess with what we have become.
And as pathways twist, it becomes harder and harder to look back for the source behind the turn.
We must savor the journey, but remember how we made it up the hill and around the bend to ford the river.
We must know how our past has molded us for the future.
Sometimes it is good to close a chapter of our life - just so long as we don't try and write over it later.
And as the car breaks the storm and leaves the Ozarks to the weeping spring,
I now know I should never take for granted what I once had in my power to grasp.
The little things among the many.
I know this is the last goodbye.
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125,008 Literary Works • 672,836 Reviews
Dear raginglive, you are truly a master of imagery! I love how you speak of the clouds hiding their tears, of the sun trying depretly to remain optimistic, and of how the world seems to be slowly curling in on itself as it finally gives up... I love this poem... However, one small error, "the little things among the many" is a sentence fragment. However the rest of your poem is AMAZING!!!
Thanks so much for the review!!
There isn't much more I can say after so many people have gone over it. Let me start out by saying it was very good. Though the flow may be off and the sentences long; I still really liked it. I don't know what it was about this poem that really hit me. It starts out seemingly just about nature, but as I continued reading it start to make me feel like it was talking about life itself. Making me think about different things in my life that each sentence related to.
The fact that you were able to make me feel that way was awesome. I apologize I can't really give you anymore then that. But I want you to know just how good this really was. Poetry isn't my strong suit, but I thoroughly enjoyed this.
Thanks so much!
Wow!!!!!!!!!!it was GREAT!!!!I loved reading your poetry.But it was not in a format of a poem.It consists of long plain sentences.You should have written it in a little sqeezed senteces.
Overall idea was really appreciable.I liked the way you imagine and think.You are having a skillful art.
Rangingful,you are having an art of expressing yourself very nicely.You know how to convince people.Its a precious god gift.Best poetry.Just remembr to write it in a poetry format.....
Really good poem.the word are powerful.it does need some flow work like others have advise.but it's a great piece of work.
That was so beautiful! It really catched me. Drifted me away.
I loved the sentence" sometimes its good to close a chapter of our life-just so long as we don't try to write it over".
There was so much passion. I also loved the fact that the sentences were short and then long. To change it a little. Just like pernicus said. But he is also right about reading it out loud. It could help. But who am i to judge, i loved it and keep going.
Keep on writting. You have talent.
Please...help...my computer is going crazy and i just wrote 3 times the same review. How do you delete the reviews?
That was so beautiful! It really catched me. Drifted me away.
I loved the sentence" sometimes its good to close a chapter of our life-just so long as we don't try to write it over".
There was so much passion.
Keep on writting. You have talent.
Thanks for the review! I'm so glad you enjoyed it, I actually wrote it going down the road during a storm!
~RagingLive
P.S.
Unfortunately you can't delete, only edit. But don't worry, no one minds and besides that, I've done it myself!
Really great poem. Loved it. liked the detail.
I absolutely love this poem. I really got drawn into it. You had great word choice. You could probably read aloud to yourself to check and make sure it sounds good.
I was immediately drawn in to this because it is the title of one of my favourite songs. I enjoyed reading it immensely. The words themselves are well chosen and put in the correct places. I like the use of short and long sentences in variation to create a sort of rhythm for the lack of a better word. As for improvements maybe try to work on the flow a bit more. Read it out loud to yourself and see if it carries well. Sometimes adding or removing a word to a piece like this can change how you read it completely so experiment with that. good luck.
Thanks for the review!
no problem