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The Crazy One

by Plume


EXT. SIDEWALK - DAY


TESSA (female, late twenties) walks down the city street. BILL (male, late twenties) follows her.


BILL
Tessa!


TESSA
Why are you here?


BILL
Why—? Tessa, I love you.


TESSA
No, you don’t, please stop saying that, it was never… You’re not supposed to be here. 


BILL
Oh, honey. You’re in one of your moods again.


TESSA
(forcefully)
No, I’m not. Please don’t call me that. Why are you here? 


Bill ignores this.


BILL
Come on, honey. Let’s get you home.


TESSA
I don’t know who you are. You shouldn’t be here. 


Bill reaches out and tries to grab Tessa’s arm. She screams and pulls away.


TESSA
Don’t touch me!


BILL
Love, I’m just trying—


TESSA
You’ve tried enough. I’m done. You don’t love me.


BILL
I do love you, Tessa. You’re the only one I care about.


TESSA
I told you to leave. Go. Go away.


Tessa takes out her phone and begins to dial someone.


BILL
Babe, I’m trying to help you! You’re not okay.


TESSA
(to her phone)
Yeah. He’s… yep. Corner of fifth street. Oh? Oh! Perfect. Thanks.


BILL
Honey. You’re sick. You’re not right in the head. 


TESSA
Right. Of course. Please leave. 


BILL
I’m not leaving without you, love. You need help. I love you.


A van pulls up, and Tessa stops walking. Bill stops walking because Tessa stops walking. The side of the van reads PENDLETON PSYCHIATRIC WARD. A HOSPITAL ATTENDANT steps out. 


TESSA
Finally.


BILL
Honey, look. They’re here to help. They’re here to help you!


HOSPITAL ATTENDANT
Ah, there you are, Mr. Pinner. We were wondering where you’d gone. Remember, you aren’t allowed outside without a chaperone.


The hospital attendant goes over to Bill and wraps a gentle but firm arm around him. The attendant leads him to the van, nearly forcing him to get inside. 


BILL
What? No! I— no. Tessa. Tessa! Tessa! I love you!


The van drives away with Bill inside. Tessa smiles.


TESSA
No, you don’t.


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346 Reviews


Points: 30400
Reviews: 346

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Sun Jan 31, 2021 3:06 am
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whatchamacallit wrote a review...



Hi Plume! I'm here for a review, courtesy of Team Crewmates :)

Ooh wow, another awesome script from you! I love how much suspense and character development you're able to create in such an incredibly short scene. I agree with MadilynReads, I honestly couldn't tell who was the crazy one up until the end - and even then, I wasn't sure if Bill was actually crazy or Tessa was some mean psychopath who had managed to get him locked up just out of spite. That uncertainty creates an awesome cliffhanger! And regardless of whether this has a sequel, I think you chose a perfect place to end it at. I don't think the point of this script is a clean, definite ending; it's more about the relationship between the two characters, if that makes sense!

There was one part of the script I found a bit confusing:

No, you don’t, please stop saying that, it was never… You’re not supposed to be here.
.
.
.
I don’t know who you are. You shouldn’t be here.
^I'm not sure how Tessa doesn't know who Bill is, considering she seemed to be remembering something about their past relationship in the first line I quoted? Unless she's purposefully lying, or I'm missing something (totally possible haha!). But I don't exactly see what her motivation for lying could be. A bit of clarification wouldn't hurt, I think.

I think I might've commented this on another script of yours, but I really like how you use fractured / broken bit of dialogue, and let some thoughts trail off. It adds to the effect of this feeling like a natural, real dialogue (because really, who talks in fully-developed thoughts and complete sentences all the time??) I thought it was especially effective near the end, when Bill says: "What? No! I— no. Tessa. Tessa! Tessa! I love you!"


All in all, this is a very strong (and engaging!) script! Aside from clearing up that one bit of confusion, I have no real critiques to give you c: I love how you portray the two different characters, and I really enjoyed the ambiguity of the ending <3 I hope this review helps in some way!

Keep writing <3

whatcha




Plume says...


Yeah, now that you point it out that one bit does seem a little disjointed/nonsensical. I think when I originally wrote it I was trying to place it either as Tessa looking for help from strangers (i. e. someone sees and hears her struggling with a man who she says she doesn't know) or that she's crazy and remembers things one moment and forgets them the next, to add to the ambiguity. Thanks for the review though! I'm really glad you liked it.



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Wed Jan 20, 2021 6:37 pm
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MadilynReads wrote a review...



Woah. I think my brain just broke. I don’t know if Tessa is just a scheming jerk and was pretending like Bill was crazy so that he would be taken away or if he really did love her and she went mad. Either way, excellent story! It is so short but in the short time it gives you a very unsettled feeling and attaches you to the characters. (Come to think of it, the new WandaVision does the same thing.) Spooky.




Plume says...


Thank you!! I'm glad you're having this reaction; that was the intention!




Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream.
— Mark Twain