Colours
A beautiful day
In the prologue of May
Brings rain to the city next to the sea
A small flower child
Walking down the white aisle
Turns grey with the raindrops, what a beauty is she
Who holds the colour rain soaks in
Shows me difference in kin
Though a bright whole, so vibrant they be
When you take a look
At each cranny and nook
That makes indigo a different shade from violet to see
A small flower child
That walks down the aisle
Isn’t glum about rain but says “listen to me
There’s a rainbow right there
And I’m grey so it’s fair
Once it goes my colours will return, wait and see!”
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125,010 Literary Works • 672,839 Reviews
Hi it’s Cozmo here to give you a short and sweet review!
Wow okay I love the little story you made here. Rain during a wedding (I think it’s a wedding)? That usually sucks but you made into such a lovely visual. I can clearly tell that it’s in the perspective of the flower child, and they remind me of myself a little bit (I always have to point out rainbows and I get so excited.) I love the lines “Who holds the color rain soaks in/Shows me difference in kin”
You wrote a lovely poem!
Have a lovely day!
-Cozmo
Hi there again writer! Cupid here, thought I'd fly over a review for you! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today! Let's dive in, shall we?
🔶 Top Graham Cracker First Impression!
Your poem, "Colors" immediately captured my attention with your vivid imagery describing the beauty of a rainy day and the perspective of a small flower child. The prologue of May and the rain-soaked city next to the sea set the scene of the poem, creating a beautiful atmosphere along with your imagery. The use of colors as a central theme is intriguing to me, and the inclusion of the flower child adds a touch innocence and optimism.
🔥 Slightly Burned Marshmallow: Room Improvements!
In your poem, you effectively convey the beauty in the rain and the anticipation of a rainbow, but I think there is a little room for further development in terms of narrative and structure transitions between different ideas and elements could be smoother to enhance the overall flow of poem.
(Also I didn't know if you intentionally spelt "Colors" as "Colours" if so don't mind this part!)
One more thought, providing a bit more context and detail could enhance the reader's understanding and connection to the piece even more! But other then that wonderful job with your writing!!
🍫 Melty Hershey's Chocolate: Highlights the Piece!
What stood out to me the most is your ability to capture the vibrant nature of colors and their impact on our perceptions. The line:
beautifully conveys the idea of colors as a reflection of diversity and individuality. The flower child perspective adds a sense of optimism and hope, showcasing the ability to find beauty even in gray moment! 🔆
🔥 Perfectly Toasted Marshmallow: Favorite lines!
This stanza beautifully captured my attention! the hope and optimism of the flower child in these lines, emphasizing the idea that colors return after the storm. Your truly conveyed a sense of resilience and a positive outlook on life, Well done!
Bottom Graham Cracker: Closing thoughts!
Your effective uses of colors as a symbol of diversity and hope really stood out making it resonate with your reader! Keep exploring and expressing the beauty of the world through your words! Thank you for sharing this lovely piece.
Fly high writer, Cupid. 💘