Yes I'm Not

This poem......is unusual, In a good way. It reminds me of dark and serious lyrics from a professional author, and it resembles some old kind of proverb. So, overall, I was impressed by it.

I especially love the line "That only when I'm chained, I dream of being free" because that is soooo true! And I also like "Fogret trying to be happy, I prefer to be depressed".

Keep it up!

Mysticalxx

This is strange. And I mean that in a good way.
This reminds me of an episode of the mighty Boosh ("Tommy" if you know it) where they spend the episode questioning the apparent. "He is dead. But is he really dead?" "I will shut up. But will I really shut up?"
Anyhow this was very good, the "opposites" and "mirroring" poetic devices obviously play a big part in this poem.
What I liked the most however is the rhyming couplet at the end. I like finishing rhyming couplets, methinks due to Shakespeare.
Hope this helps,
Take That You Fiend!

Sunshine here to review....

I really can't say much because everyone else beat me to the punch. I didn't really have any nitpicks anyway. All I can really say is how simply awesome this is. My favorite line would be:

That only when I'm chained,

I dream of being free.

That line right there is pretty epic. And welcome to YWS I hope you like it here. I hope you post more stuff soon, you seem like an awesome writer.

hey man, I adored this. it was such an original, well expressed piece of work. well done. my only criticism, is that the last two lines were unnecessary.

Hey!! BitterRosemary here to give you a review!!! Let's get started!

I absolutely love this poem.

The contradictions throughout are excellent and really covey a sense of defiance and "fuck you world!" (sorry really no other way to word that).

Let's go line by line:

"Yes, I'm not"
Brilliant, pulls the reader in immediately.

"Don't you think it's ironic"
References previous line but also leads into the next line, providing immediate continuity, which is hard to accomplish. Kudos for that.

"Can't seem to let me be"
Again. the defiance shines through. Kickass!!

"That only when I'm chained
I dream of being free"
A bit cliche but good nonetheless, powerful imagery.

"I'm thirsty in the water
And hungry when I eat"
I personally love this line. It adds a sense of mystery that pulls the reader along. Why? How could you be hungry while eating? It makes you subconsciously want to read more.

"But tired wide awake,
And tired when I sleep."
This is powerful imagery. A bit repetitive though. Maybe try "But tired wide awake/ Even when I sleep"


"I know very little,
If i study I know less"
I believe these line are a bit unecessary. The theme so far has been " I contradict myself in everything essential to human life." You've only written about essentials, such as freedom, food, water, and sleep. Throwing studying in there is a bit odd. It kind of throws off the unity of the piece. But it's just my opinion.

"Forget trying to be happy,
I prefer to be depressed."
I love this bit. It hits home with me. It will probably hit home with most of your readers as well, which is spectacular, and adds a sense of connectability that you've lacked up until this point.

"What's true is false, what's false is true,
Love to hate me, I hate to love you too."
This is a powerful ending and I personally love the very last line. Lots of stark truth in this poem.


Overall, I give your poem a 9 out of 10.
I thoroughly enjoyed it and I hope to review more of your work in the future!
I hope this helped!

Never stop writing!
BitterRosemary

Hey!!! Great work!!!

The title you've named its so perfect. Because everything you say in the poem, YOUR NOT. If everything you say is true, which is to be falsified but your second to last line,
"Whats' true is false, whats false is true".

Another thing, I loved the contradiction. It kind of makes you think that we do have a option in life. Living either this way or that way.

Overall i think its a good poem. Although theirs no special message to portray.

And i think that's why your posted it as general and humor. Which is good as intended.

Good piece of work

Keep writing Good.