This is nothing. Don't look at it. It's just nothing...

Thanks everyone. I decided to re-try. This is not going to be my novel. I'm in the romance mood, so let's see where this goes. I'm about to post the start of my Novel Attempt Numero Dos, so check it out if you will.

Personally, I would throw this away and start over. A prologue really isn't necessary for this; rather than coming right and saying "hey I have synesthesia," let it come out naturally during the actual story. Add the extra sensations into the normal descriptions of things through this person's perspective. It's a basic case of telling versus showing, where, as usual, telling kills the story.

So far, it's obviously too soon to say anything about the story (as there isn't one), but this could be an interesting element.

Mt brain's a little slow, so if you want the grammar nit-pick job PM me and I'll get to it sometime soon-ish.

I like your story...or rather your character. What you have here, by the way, is a character. I am guessing this is the corrected version, because it sounded not too essay ish, though maybe a little auto-biographical. =P

But anyways, character. No plot.

Why is your character talking about pain? Do they usually monologue to themselves about their uissues? Or has something prompted this self-evaluation. Maybe because they're different they've just been beat up? They fell down? Cut their hand?

Something needs to be hapenning. I love the character because they are unique, but will I love their story?

You tell us quite a few things, some things you could show. For example, maybe the character is making themselves lunch, and hurt their hand...and as they're walking to their room they notice the TV is showing some drama, and they notice how different the kid's life is to theirs. They notice the things that are different about their house, about themselves, all the while they are doing something.

Just a suggestion. If this is the prologue to a novel, you have space to make it longer. You manage to get readers attention with your first line, but how unique your character is gets old when that's all we're reading.

I think you'll do very well with this, what you've got looks really good. ^_^ Good luck!

Thanks people! I totally agree. I just thought about that as I was posting it. Whoops! I'm going to fix it and put the edited version up tomorrow (most likely).

I'll agree to agree with the agreements as well

It's too...explanitory. For a prolugue you don't want to through out all this information. Basically what that does is it makes the reader very familiar with the condition but doesn't do anything to pull them into the book, and if I open a book to read a few pages to see if I like it...I'm going to put it down right away.

What really needs to be done in a prologue, assuming you need to have one, is you need to show your writing style. Show the reader what the rest of the book is going to be like. And show them a little insight to the character...don't describe the character, give insight....a little different you see

I agree with Amelia. Instead of saying 'orange hurts my eyes,' say 'GAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! TURN IT OFF TURN IT OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!' Put her in a normal situation. School, dance, etc... maybe the guy she likes tastes like a chocolate cupcake. 'I got that wonderful taste in my mouth again...' etc. Details! :D:D:D:D:D PM me if you need anything

This almost seems more like a book report than the beginning of a novel.

Why? Because it summarizes the character. There's no action. Pure description takes us out of the story, sits us on the roof to watch the characters report about their lives. What you should strive for is have your reader feel more like a ghost: someone who can walk around the character's world with them and pick up information by the things they do and say, but not (of course) interact with them.

What can you do about it? Incorporate! Instead of saying "For example, if someone has done a project and made a poster..." you can say something to the tune of "Mary wanted to make her poster pretty and put the whole title in orange." Leave out the "for example" and launch right in to something specific. Something specific that the reader can latch on to and learn for themselves the other ways the main character thinks she's a "freak" rather than taking your word for it from generalities.

More specifically, something you can concentrate on are these sentences: "Like, the letter "g" and the number "four" share the same metallic color. If they make the whole word one certain color, it upsets me, because in my mind, they're the wrong colors." Concentrating on this sentence, you can describe an instance where the letter G and the number 4 have been confused by the narrator, or when she gets upset that the whole word is in one color.

You don't have to use these examples right away. Save a few and sprinkle them through the story when you need a dose of the narrator's way of looking at things. The reader will still understand the story even if they don't know every single detail about the main character right from the get go.

Let me know if you have any questions; I'd be happy to help ^^ Happy writing!