Chapter Two
Showers and Shame
Be Careful what your worship, soon you become a slave to that which you bow to, and some masters are kinder than others.
-Paul Meyers, The Worshipers Dillemia
When you are offered a job to be involved in the greatest scientific discovery since Einstein, I give you one piece of advice. Tell your mom. It’ll make her proud, also, if, through a series of very unlikely events you end up disappearing from the modern-day, you would have liked to have said goodbye to your mom.
The latter of these two things did not occur to me, but the former did. I cared quite a bit about what my mom thought of me and I wanted to make her proud.
So, for just a glimpsing happy moment I considered telling my mom. A child-like instinct, and then reality slapped me in the face, and my stomach dropped as I remembered I had not responded to my mom's texts or calls since Jenna broke up with me.
I pushed those feelings away and stood up. No time to feel like a disappointment! I turned around and took a deep breath, I wanted to check my email for the information Charlie said he’d send me, but I didn't feel respectable to face it in my current state. My clothes stuck to my body, my hair was coarse and at the same time oily. I stank of musks, my face felt cracked, and my eyelids stuck with eye boogers. I deserved a shower. I’d earned it.
Well, in all reality the world deserved to have me showered, but that’s beside the point and not the frame of reference I was in at that moment.
I speed walked across my apartment, stepping around trash, dirty laundry, and the occasional thrifted piece of furniture. I slipped past the one eternally closed door of the apartment and into my bathroom. Very few bathrooms used by only one individual have been as dirty as that bathroom. Since I would like you to continue believing I have some value as a human being, I will not describe it.
I stripped down and threw my clothes all over the bathroom, jumping into the shower. The tub floor was cold and slimy, but it had not been used in days. I had committed to taking cold showers, something I thought also might help me become more productive. All this commitment did is make me never shower, because I'd rather not bathe than subject myself to the pain of cold showers.
“I deserve a warm shower this time.” I said as I turned on the facet. I felt myself washing away the past two weeks as the warm water ran over me.
Gosh, I miss warm showers. I miss showers. Period. Why didn't shower when I could have? Do it twice a day, it’s not like anything else is going on in your life!
Anyway, I showered, using the tiny sliver of the bar of soap that remained to clean everything. I’d run out of shampoo 3 weeks before. But I used the tiny bar to its fullest extent, and let myself enjoy the hot water. A wave of euphoria hit me as I remembered the phone call. It was my big break. I was going to do something important. Jumped up in the air and fist pumped. As I landed back on the shower floor my feet lost all friction in the slime and shot out from under me. I flailed about wildly as I fell and caught the shower curtain.
Shower curtains are not exactly meant to hold my 210 weight, so it did little to save me from smashing into the shower floor.
So after picking myself up, surveying the countless broken curtain hooks that now the floor, I decided this was probably a sign I should be done with the shower and expressing my joy. I turned the water off and stepped out of the tub and onto the soft mat.
As I looked up I was caught by the nacked, dripping reflection of my own body in the bathroom mirror. Whoever designed a bathroom so that the mirror looks directly in on the shower needs a stern talking to because I was not entirely emotionally prepared to see my full profile reflected on a smudged and misty bathroom mirror.
But, I still saw most of my general frame. I was of northern European descent, so all of me was very hairy, but sometimes I didn’t like to be reminded of that. I was tall as well, that’s what you get from a dutch dad. But everything had a nice comforting layer of flab.
As I stared at that body, that didn't feel entirely like my own, my favourite phrase floated back to the top.
That’s why Jenna left you.
“If she left me because literally, every part of me is bad I don’t understand why she stayed with me for six months.” I said into my echoey bathroom as I stepped out onto the tile. “Like, just pick a few things she’d leave me over, it can’t be literally everything or she never would have hooked up with me, to begin with. I mean Jenna has bad judgment but not that bad of judgment.”
I knew bad judgment was not really the correct word for being overly positive about the state of the world. I just wasn’t in the mood to acknowledge the fact she gave everything the benefit of the doubt because that meant I must have been such a loser that no amount of beneficial doubt could save me from her breaking up with me.
On that comforting note I dried off and brushed my teeth! Oh, how it feels to have a clean mouth! I thought smiling into the mirror. Now clean, I got dressed in formal attire, I used to love dressing formally, I found it more comfortable and natural than sweatpants. I had stopped since dressing like that was something I connected to writing and being a busy scholarly individual, a part of me I now feared and hated. But at that moment I felt it would be more respectful to greet this well-dressed as well as clean, and on my computer, not in my phone.
So, I mustered my courage and went over to the eternally closed door of my apartment.
My office sprung from the fantastic idea to avoid working in lieu of turning the one bedroom into an office, and doing all the other living in the main room, but proved to just be a way to reduce the number of rooms in my apartment by one.
Unsurprisingly, moving furniture from one room to the other had not cured my current slump of not being able to work. So I had begun to avoid that room because being in it without working made me feel like I was wasting it, and that I would work in it at some time soon - which was a lie.
I was completely aware of this problem and the whole situation, but being aware of a problem does not solve it, or else I'd be a flawless man. I sat down at my desk, and opened the laptop.
I entered my password, and the computer opened.
A small sucker punch of guilt caught me in my lower abdomen as I saw what was on the screen.
“Each arm of a cephalopod has an independent brain of its own. Allowing each of them to take independent actions and if cut from the body of the octopus hunt indepently for a period of time.”
“You want to say independent one more time buddy?” I muttered, scanning the rest of the document. Similar confusing typo-ridden paragraphs filled the rest of the document. My eyes wandered over to the page counter. 68 pages, nowhere near a finished first draft. I closed the tab and opened my email, it was a mess of unanswered emails, subscriptions, and spam.
I couldn’t help but notice the email from my editor and agent, Kelly. My finger scrolled over and clicked on it of its own accord.
March 16th
“Hey, Matt ! Hope you're doing well. I heard you and Jenna broke up, sorry about that! How’s the first draft coming along? I believe you said you would have it done by the 30th. Is that still going to work? I’m excited to see it! Send it over as soon as you can. I’m interested to see what you’ve managed to do this time.”
I resisted a dark chuckle, it was the 20th, so unless I become a professional speed typist I would not be meeting that deadline. I left the email behind and unanswered.
I opened the email from the unrecognized Address, Gertrude@Athena.gov
It was short, obviously not written by Charlie, but some coworker. It addressed me formally, and said they would like to have me come out for an interview, and that they would be having a press release of sorts, and they wanted me involved, to ‘help explain the complicated science to the population.’
They wanted me to respond with my details, and the soonest I could fly out.
I did so promptly, putting the earliest I could leave that next day.
I sat there, staring at the screen, waiting for a response. My breath was quick, and my stomach was churching with fear, excitement, and nervous farts.
An email binged back.
“Sounds excellent. We have purchased your ticket to Paris for tomorrow a red-eye flight tomorrow, attached is your ticket. Bring enough luggage for a week-long trip, and whatever you need to begin work on one of your books. We’ll fly your other stuff out later. When you arrive in Paris we will have a valet to bring you to Athena your hotel off of Athena headquarters.
Thank you, and happy flying,
Gertrude
I jumped over to the email from Kelly. I didn’t actually know if I would be getting the job, I didn’t actually know that this would work out. But I had to believe that.
“Kelly, I’m so sorry but I will not be able to meet that deadline. Give me a week or two and I’ll have a new outline for you. This will be the biggest thing in either of our careers -scratch that, this will be the biggest thing possible in nonfiction. You’ll understand what I’m saying soon.
Thanks and so sorry I’ve swerved again… but this time I promise it’ll be worth it.
Sincerely,
Mathew
PS You're the most patient, awesome person I know!”
Nothing like some unapologetic flattery.
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Canary word: Present
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,733 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm baaack for chapter two!!
First Impression: Okayy....well, this looks to be mostly filler here, just kind of showing us that Mathhew has been in a bit of a stupor and is a bit cut off from his friends and family somewhat...and starting the process of him getting back to the swing of things, and I think its a pretty good one here, maybe one minor issue I picked up on.
Anyway let's get right to it,
Well, we're starting off on an interesting note there...I didn't even think about this person's parents or family at all, but looks like we've got a relationship that's gone slightly sour there...and it being mentioned here means it may just be important I suppose.
Haha....you almost never run across jokes like that one in stories, but ahh, I love to see a bit of that...science fiction honestly needs to have a lot more of these. Also...wow this man has really let himself go somewhat if that's the state he's in. You certainly get a good sense of how much this breakup and whatnot has affected him.
Welll...that's one way to get around having to describe something
Uhh...I think the shower joke ran for a touch too long there...like don't get me wrong, its funny, but that's just way too much use of the world shower in a fairly short period not to mention it gets a touch boring to get this much detail about a man taking a shower when there is literal time travel about to happen. Like its good to see him excited and then get himself in trouble as a result...but umm..I think it could be a touch more concise.
I don't know if I'm emotionally prepared to see this particular reflection.
Hmm, okay so this bit of detail is useful...here I don't mind that bit of extra detail, but earlier that doesn't seem to serve too much of a purpose, hence why it said it gets a bit boring.
Gotta love someone that talks to himself....as much of a chaotic mess as Matthew is, I think I'm really starting to like his character so far.
Ahh yes...the feeling of being clean after a long time of not caring at all what you're appearance looks like....definitely not something I can totally relate to.
Ahh loving the descriptions of his computer there, these are such tiny little things, but I love how it all adding towards the greater picture that is the character of Mathew...it certainly helps us understand what sort of person this man was.
AHhh...well that seems like a nice person, not sure if he's going to be important judging by who he is...but umm, love the attention to detail you have in this story...just be careful to draw that line somewhere or things can go a touch towards unnecessarily detailed.
Well...that seems like a proper email....definitely a safer means of communication compared to the phone...and I'm not sure if this is actually what he's being called in for or if this is a cover up cause either way that looks fairly generic enough to be safe from those who'd steal data like that.
"Nervous farts"...this is going to go on my tombstone when I die from laughter while reading this story.
Hmm...ooh yes...that is indeed the best way to get that sort of email out to people...did I mention I really like Matthew, I feel like I should do that again.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Overall, a pretty solid chapter, besides that one shower scene where I felt things got a bit too in depth..but umm, the rest of it was pretty nice, especially those few email there, you love to see that level of detail with even the actual text of the emails mentioned. Looking forward to reading the next part
I'll hopefully catch up by the time you post chapter 7 next WednesdayAs always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
Speaking of attention to detail, this review is a short novel! Thank you so much! I'll be sure to cut that filler, I agree, the shower scene goes on for to long.
Thanks so much!
xD You're Welcome!!!
Hi MaybeAndrew,
Mailice here with a short review!
That was a very interesting chapter. I liked how you took a different tone from the first to this one to give a little more background information about the narrator.
That was also really what I liked here, that you took time to present a little bit of the character and present some characteristics of him so that the reader gets a better picture of him. The insertion of his weight, for example, I thought was a great segue to talk about his relationship and also to show that he's a bit thoughtful in that way because he doesn't directly understand what draws people to other people.
It was great to get to know a bit of his routine and how the plot develops from that as well.
I like how your introduction sounds so beautiful and at the same time so gloomy, as if the narrator already has a premonition or is just pessimistic. That's definitely a helpful hint.
In terms of form, I would also highlight the two mails a little differently, either by italic or perhaps another way of highlighting. I liked how you maintained a calm and relaxed tone for the most part, to also exude that serenity that is needed to develop sympathy for Matt. I would just sometimes make sure that you don't make the paragraphs too short, because sometimes it seems very bullet point and not like a narrative. Otherwise, it was a good introductory chapter for the character.
Other points that caught my eye:
The "nd" in the "a" between around and took must have disappeared during all the time travel.
I think the sections are a bit short and I don't know why you split them up like that. Either you can join them together by adding new connecting sentences or expand the sections in general. Later you use this style again and it seems more like a list than a flowing text.
I don´t remember how it was in the last chapter anymore, but for these train of thoughts, I would recommend to put them in italic to show the reader that they are indeed train of thoughts from the narrator. They are more separated than the “normal” thoughts of the narrator that help continuing the story.
Have fun writing!
Mailice
Heyyyyy! Forever back here for a tiny review!
Mathew seems to be an interesting person. There was not much character development in the first chapter. So, I didn't comment on that but in this chapter, there was a great description of the character. Like kind of his nature seems to be whimsical.
The description of the shower was actually a bit funny and definitely the narrator has gotta see that man and give him a good lecture. He earned it the day when he did that. It really made me laugh.
I wonder why Jenna actually broke up with him. He, at least seems to be funny and good man, in my opinion. One's academics doesn't define one, I believe. Also, ah procrastination is... Kind of good if not yet great. Well, I am actually not being sarcastic if you are thinking that. It often helps. From this, I can sort of carve out the character of Jenna and she doesn't seem to understand the narrator and his feelings. Like I guess the narrator was actually in love with her as we can see from his condition after the break-up.
Hopefully the email was actually from Charlie's company. This is after all a big invention and hm... There are can always be traitors to pass on information. Now, if that was from the wrong place. I wonder what is gonna happen with him... He seems to be a writer or something by profession and am I wrong to assume that this story can be counted as a story written by him for publishing. Like he told Kelly, I hope that was the name that he would not fail her this time and something very interesting is gonna happen and I think he referred to this thing. And that was all. This was overall a great chapter and builds on some mystery.
Just lemme know if my review was of any help and if you have any questions regarding it, feel free to ask me. And yes, tag me on the release of the next chapter.
Keep writing!
~Forever