(My Missing) Picture Frame

ShootingStars wrote:Holy rainbows! You have a very talented voice! I love this song sooooo much. Have you ever considered American Idol? Well, if you live in America anyways... In my opinion this song sounded a little country, and I'm a southern girl so it was awesome!
OMG KEEP SINGING!
--- Shooting Stars

Holy rainbows! You have a very talented voice! I love this song sooooo much. Have you ever considered American Idol? Well, if you live in America anyways... In my opinion this song sounded a little country, and I'm a southern girl so it was awesome!
OMG KEEP SINGING!
--- Shooting Stars

LanaBrown wrote:*likes* wow you have a really great voice and your song is amazing. You are an inspiration to me.

*likes* wow you have a really great voice and your song is amazing. You are an inspiration to me.

That was BEAUTIFUL. Jash, you're an inspiration! YAY!
Young and talented artist FTW!

the lyrics are beautiful and so is your voice! I'm practically speechless! BRAVO

Thanks, Mr. Karzkin! Your advices are and will be very helpful! But just a few things to clear up:

First, guitar, intonation. I have no idea why the guitar is a tad off! I used an electric tuner (you know, I was a bit afraid that my ear would miss and I wanted this to be perfect). I just don't understand it. I mean, The electric guitar was matched with my acoustic guitar (rhythm), and I just don't understand why it does that. D: Any thoughts, or other advices for that? I should've told my mixer to fix it, huh. Well, one obvious thing, I couldn't. I don't understand.

Next, mints. I totally agree! Brushing my teeth every time I try to sing does work like a charm! Before I recorded this, I wanted to brush my teeth and use mouthwash, but my mom said I'll be fine. (I brushed before we went to the studio, but I wanted my mouth to be fresh again.) So I didn't brush my teeth. I thought it was only my imagination, you know, that I sing better when I brush my teeth. But it's true! You do sing better when you've just brushed your teeth. Don't cha, Mr. Karzkin?

Last, diction. I do want to pronounce the words well, but my braces just makes it so HARD! *sigh* My friend told me to force it. But I'm quite sensitive to pain, so... *frowns*

I perfectly understand everything you were saying. Your review was well presented and your want to give out a real constructive criticism totally showed. Thank you again. I am glad that you somehow liked the song. =))

~ Jash B.

Hey Jash, your lyrics are great. However, I feel I have a few things to say about your music. It too is very good, but there is still room for improvement.

First, intonation. The electric guitar is quite sharp. I can't tell if the electric is synthed or you are playing it. If it's synthed, it means the acoustic and your voice is flat. Either way, remember that tuning and warm up are crucial before you start playing. If your ears aren't good enough to pick it, use an electric tuner. Also, practice your tone (especially for your voice) every day with an electric tuner. Sing a chromatic scale from your lowest note to your highest, holding each note as long as you can, and focusing on hitting each note cleanly (not sliding up or scooping), and keeping in tune with the tuner. I myself practice tone and intonation for at least 40 minutes every day, often more (I play the sax and other winds).

Second, breath control. You often slide up to the first note of the line, and sometimes cut the last note of the line short because you run out of breath. There are a couple of ways to fix this. First, make sure you take a deep breath before you start your phrases, and make sure you're breathing from your diaphragm and not from your chest. Second, practice holding notes for as long as possible every day (as above). You'll gradually increase your breath stamina. Third, keep fit. Good cardio fitness = good breath control and stamina. Fourth, a little trick I learned; before you play brush your teeth or chew on a few tic-tacs or something. The mint flavour helps open up your airways. Trust me, it work like a charm.

Third, diction. Practice enunciating your words very clearly when you're singing. Some of the words in your recording are a bit jumbled or missing altogether, and I wouldn't know what the lyrics are if I didn't have the transcription.

Finally, phrasing. There are few lines in the chorus that just don't fit nicely:

You’re the reason I keep smiling
Whenever my young heart’s crying

Hey, guys! Thanks for checking out. =)

Icy, I think it'd meant that he's everything she wants. Something about completeness, or satisfaction, though nobody's perfect. Kinda like that. XD ;]]

lovely.

lovely.

Jashy! This was really nice!
I don't want to nitpick - seeing as you've already recorded it and such but I did have a question:

Jash wrote:All that I could find
Were the seven colors of the rainbow

*likes*...*a lot*

Hi Jash. Wow. You have a lovely voice! The lyrics are nice too, along with the melody. I wish I had more to say, but...when will you be posting the rest of the song?
*likes*
-Kae