Trauma
Heart aches
Sobs escape
Throbbing within
Agony tears apart the soul
No respite from this suffering
It lingers on, a constant weight
Heavy burdens carried each day
Endless struggle, a battle fought alone
Hopeful, for a light to guide the way out...
Believing that one day, I'll be free from this burden.
Of all the pain and hurt that I've endured
Each breath a struggle, gasping for air
Of a past that once brought me joy
Tears fall, a never-ending stream
Heart heavy, weighed down
Gnaws at my soul
Emptiness grips
Endless tears
Pain
Goodbye World
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125,024 Literary Works • 672,762 Reviews
Hey there, Alice here to give a review!
MY THOUGHTS
Let's start with the title "A Heavy Anchor". Ah that itself speaks like a heavy pain that has lingered in the poets's mind for long. And the "Goodbye World" in the end said a lot too. This poem felt like a last letter to that trauma that was held long in the heart, a goodbye to life, which in itself is a dark topic to write on which you expressed beautifully. The lines are open-ended and the poem itself is very empathetic. It makes you feel the pain of the writer as well as reminds us of that one pain that once we thought was unending.
STRUCTURE AND FORM
The one thing that shined for me in this poem was its short impactful lines. And especially its diamond-shaped structure. Formatting is an important part of poetry writing for me it helps in how the poem flows when it is read. You did an amazing job at it!
Overall a nice poem would love to read more from you!
Keep Writing👍
-Alice
Greetings @HB1103,
I want to take a moment to share my thoughts on your poem, "A Heavy Anchor." As I read through the lines, I couldn't help but feel a profound sense of empathy and connection with the emotions you portrayed. Your choice of words, although simple, carried immense power and allowed me to grasp the depth of the pain and suffering.
The way you described trauma and heartaches struck a chord within me. The image of sobs escaping and the heart throbbing with agony painted a vivid picture of the intense emotions that have been experienced.
The metaphor of a heavy anchor resonated with me strongly. It beautifully captured the weight of the burdens that are being carried each day. Your words painted a picture of a battle fought alone, a journey of suffering.
The poem's journey from suffering to hope was both moving and inspiring. Your belief in finding a light to guide the way out conveyed a sense of strength and resilience. The image of gasping for air and the tears falling like a never-ending stream painted a poignant picture of the immense emotional toll it takes.
The final line, "Goodbye World," left me with a mix of emotions. It felt like a cry for release, a desperate plea to escape the overwhelming pain. It reminded me of the depths of despair and the longing for solace. It's a poignant ending that left me with a sense of sadness but also a glimmer of hope, as it hinted at the possibility of finding peace.
Your words have touched me, and I admire your ability to express such raw emotions through simple yet powerful language. Keep on writing!
Me,
Rose
Hey Rose, thank you so much for the review and the kind words & compliments!