Every morning I take a breath,
Wondering what the day will bring.
Some days are better when I ponder,
"What can I bring the day?"
Always do your best,
They expect nothing less.
They've seen my potential now-
I have to be amazing.
The stress, the worry, the over-thinking
Carry my love into the dark.
I've got to do better;
To make a mistake would be fatal.
I never seem to keep perfection.
What am I doing with my time?
Every flaw I make, I lose motivation.
Why can't I move on from this?
When I do my best,
I'm on top of the world.
When I am too hard on myself,
I lose focus of the purpose.
I have to climb back up,
Until I go and fall again.
The tears, the sweat, and blood
Meet me on my quest.
How hard is it to play my best?
I think I need a rest.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,257 Literary Works • 674,331 Reviews
I really love this piece! I think a lot of people can relate to having that voice in your head always telling you that you are not good enough. Love the ending, too!
Thank you!
I liked how you asked lots of questions in your poem to help readers understand what you are thinking. I understand all "the stress, the worry, and over-thinking" that you mentioned because I get stressed and overwhelmed so easily. The only correction I might make is in the line where is said "the stress, the worry, and overthinking," I would put "the overthinking" to make it match with "the stress" and "the worry." It flows better that way, I think. But other than that, I love the poem! Great job!
Thank you! I stress myself so often trying to keep from disappointing my loved ones so this was really difficult for me to share.. Thank you for the correction! I like it better with the added "the"
Living with a set of perfectionist parents, I completely understand where your narrator is coming from. I think that everyone in the world deals with feeling this way sometimes and as for those who don't, well, they're lucky.
Anyways, this was beautifully written and worded. Every syllable was a heartbeat of truth (sorry for the words, I just completed a poetry club session with my friends).
You took something personal, which we as authors all do, and made it relatable in a beautiful, tragic way.
Excellent.
Thank you!!!!!
I know the pain of not being able to feel like you're doing anything right. I love your words in this poem. It touches my heart, and I'm sure anyone else who reads this. I also believe your wording and the overall way it is written is perfect! I wouldn't change a thing.
"The stress, the worry, and overthinking
Carry my love into the dark."
This is my favorite quote. The meaning is flawless, and means everything that I think at stressful moments. However, it also has a misspelled word in it also. "Overthinking" should have a hyphen in between it to become "over-thinking."
Overall you did an amazing job. It's perfect, and I'll definitely be reading more from you.
-DevilishAngel
Thank you so much!! This means so much to me and I will be sure to correct the spelling lol