Hi!! Thought I'd stop by again after the awesome taste I got in chapter 17.
I like how this opened up. There's definitely a unique magic to your world that I'm just massively intrigued by. But that aside, watching your characters interact here was a fresh take as a new reader, especially after that eerie dream we had in the previous chapter.
I didn't know it was Daffodil making the misture until halfway through that first section, which certainly confused me. Hopefully that makes sense to your consistent readers though. In fact, I think there's quite an element of vagueness in your writing for this chapter. It works for dream segments like the previous chapter. Here, it feels a bit disjointed. For instance, the first part is Daffodil making this mixture for Ciana. Aaron and Ciana are doing nothing but waiting, but perhaps there is dialogue that could happen here or actions or thoughts that could at least develop character growth if not advance the plot/any subplots.
When Aaron goes to get the chapstick, I thought that section started out really strong again. I could identify the purpose and knew how it was relevant. I love how you described the market again -- you really just have a knack for imagery. It's outstanding. Then when Aaron mentions computers, I wasn't sure what the purpose for that was or what he was referencing or anything. I understand I haven't read chapters before this, but the transition from chapstick to computer probably could have been transitioned smoother. Maybe we can get into his head and go through his thought process better, how this relates to his current situation, why it's worth taking the extra time from chapstick shopping to do this, etc.
What an eerie end to your chapter, though! Gosh, I love the look and feel of this magic. The way you described it at the end was just awesome. I think it could have transitioned better again from the previous scene to here. It felt like a mere glimpse of storytelling when you could really wrap us up in the scene again, give it some more drive. You're fantastic at showing us images and details, and I think it would really enhance your main plot if you did the same to these sections too.
Aside from some fleshing out, I think it's a decent chapter. It definitely has some drive and is achieving a significant part of your plot, which is to develop this mixture for Ciana. And what an awesome cliffhanger to end on. I certainly will have to read the next one to see what I'm missing here!!
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