It never crossed my mind
That there would be a time
When the reflection in the mirror
Wasn’t really mine
---
Now she’s lost
Somewhere in a deep, dark hole
Hidden away from the world
And I keep her there
I keep her quiet
So the monster won’t come out from the closet
And the life I’m living is a lie
But its better than letting go
So I keep this fake girl in place
And slowly burn her soul
---
What do I do when
The drops of sarcasm that come from my lips
Are like like cobwebs, setting the way for me to trip
Over my own stupidity
But truth be told, my truth is a lie
What’s right from wrong, real or not
It’s all mixed up in one fat tear drop
It never crossed my mind
That there would be a time
When the reflection in the mirror
Wasn’t really mine
---
Now she’s lost
Somewhere in a deep, dark hole
Hidden away from the world
And I keep her there
I keep her quiet
So the monster won’t come out from the closet
And the life I’m living is a lie
But its better than letting go
So I keep this fake girl in place
And slowly burn her soul
---
Am I really too far gone
Am I just a broken doll
Sometimes I'll feel a spark
But it's choked and beaten by the dark
Inside my head
Everything's all dead
So why should the light behind my eyes
Be burning bright?
Don't expect me to cope
I'm sorry if I've lost hope
But even so this broken doll keeps kicking
In the hope she'll find a spark worth saving
----
Now she’s lost
Somewhere in a deep, dark hole
Hidden away from the world
And I keep her there
I keep her quiet
So the monster won’t come out from the closet
And the life I’m living is a lie
But its better than letting go
So I keep this fake girl in place
And slowly burn her soul
And slowly burn her soul
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Amazing work! This has that interesting aura to it making enjoyable and having me read each sentence wondering how it would play out. I also can feel the the emotions-"It never crossed my mind that there would be a time when the reflection in the mirror wasn't really mine." forgive me if I forthat wrong I was putting it down by memory. This has it's own uniqueness and special feeling to it. All/Most of us have closet and So people can both relate literally and emotionally. Since it tells a sad story is can touch others in a special way. The fact that it also reminds me of childhood and problems today is a bonus. This is your story and I must say well done. Keep on Writing!
I really enjoyed this piece.I like the imagery that surrounds it.It had a emotional feel to it.It had a lot of vivid details in it.I like the metaphors use in it.It had a nice flow to it.It also had a nice rhythm to it.I like the girl who faked herself aspect of it.It rangs true for many young females these days.You did a stupendous piece.Good luck!!!!
Hi Rose! I'm here to review your lyrics.
This is a very heartrending depiction of what soul-crushing despair must feel like. To be so depressed and hopeless you literally can't recognize yourself in the mirror, and yet can't show your true feelings to the world for fear that they wouldn't understand. So you have to put on a mask of normalcy, even when all it does is suffocate you even further, making you feel even more broken. Your descriptions are very vivid and moving, causing this piece to come alive for the reader.
Definitely my favourite lines in the poem. The imagery is spectacular, in a heart-breaking sort of way.
Another example of a beautiful use of metaphor!
I think you mean 'I keep her there', rather than 'I keep here there'
I really can't find any faults with this piece. I'm quite in awe of it, actually! Very realistic and touching, too. I'm looking forward to reading more of your works!
Hello

I really like these lyrics because it is really well written. I can get a grasp on what this person is going through/feeling (I wasn't sure if this was about you and I didn't want to assume that so hence I used the word person :/ ). I especially liked these two lines:
"The drops of sarcasm that come from my lips
Are like like cobwebs, setting the way for me to trip"
So, so, so clever.
One tiny last thing, you forgot to put question marks at the end of these lines:
"Am I really too far gone
Am I just a broken doll"
Anyways, I enjoyed reading these lyrics and thank you for sharing it