Closet

by BitterRosemary

Published November 5, 2014

In Lyrics

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It never crossed my mind

That there would be a time

When the reflection in the mirror

Wasn’t really mine        

---

Now she’s lost

Somewhere in a deep, dark hole

Hidden away from the world

And I keep her there

I keep her quiet

So the monster won’t come out from the closet

And the life I’m living is a lie

But its better than letting go

So I keep this fake girl in place

And slowly burn her soul

---

What do I do when

The drops of sarcasm that come from my lips

Are like like cobwebs, setting the way for me to trip

Over my own stupidity

But truth be told, my truth is a lie

What’s right from wrong, real or not

It’s all mixed up in one fat tear drop

It never crossed my mind

That there would be a time

When the reflection in the mirror

Wasn’t really mine

---

Now she’s lost

Somewhere in a deep, dark hole

Hidden away from the world

And I keep her there

I keep her quiet

So the monster won’t come out from the closet

And the life I’m living is a lie

But its better than letting go

So I keep this fake girl in place

And slowly burn her soul

---

Am I really too far gone

Am I just a broken doll

Sometimes I'll feel a spark

But it's choked and beaten by the dark

Inside my head

Everything's all dead

So why should the light behind my eyes

Be burning bright?

Don't expect me to cope

I'm sorry if I've lost hope

But even so this broken doll keeps kicking

In the hope she'll find a spark worth saving

----

Now she’s lost

Somewhere in a deep, dark hole

Hidden away from the world

And I keep her there

I keep her quiet

So the monster won’t come out from the closet

And the life I’m living is a lie

But its better than letting go

So I keep this fake girl in place

And slowly burn her soul

And slowly burn her soul

Comments & reviews · 4
User avatar
StrugglingAngel
Comment
StrugglingAngel commented Comment · Nov 27, 2014

Amazing work! This has that interesting aura to it making enjoyable and having me read each sentence wondering how it would play out. I also can feel the the emotions-"It never crossed my mind that there would be a time when the reflection in the mirror wasn't really mine." forgive me if I forthat wrong I was putting it down by memory. This has it's own uniqueness and special feeling to it. All/Most of us have closet and So people can both relate literally and emotionally. Since it tells a sad story is can touch others in a special way. The fact that it also reminds me of childhood and problems today is a bonus. This is your story and I must say well done. Keep on Writing!

User avatar
JinxGrey
Review
JinxGrey wrote a review Review · Nov 26, 2014

I really enjoyed this piece.I like the imagery that surrounds it.It had a emotional feel to it.It had a lot of vivid details in it.I like the metaphors use in it.It had a nice flow to it.It also had a nice rhythm to it.I like the girl who faked herself aspect of it.It rangs true for many young females these days.You did a stupendous piece.Good luck!!!!

User avatar
Eveningstar
Review
Eveningstar wrote a review Review · Nov 5, 2014

Hi Rose! I'm here to review your lyrics.

This is a very heartrending depiction of what soul-crushing despair must feel like. To be so depressed and hopeless you literally can't recognize yourself in the mirror, and yet can't show your true feelings to the world for fear that they wouldn't understand. So you have to put on a mask of normalcy, even when all it does is suffocate you even further, making you feel even more broken. Your descriptions are very vivid and moving, causing this piece to come alive for the reader.

Am I really too far gone

Am I just a broken doll

Definitely my favourite lines in the poem. The imagery is spectacular, in a heart-breaking sort of way.

The drops of sarcasm that come from my lips

Are like like cobwebs, setting the way for me to trip

Over my own stupidity

Another example of a beautiful use of metaphor!

And I keep here there

I think you mean 'I keep her there', rather than 'I keep here there'

I really can't find any faults with this piece. I'm quite in awe of it, actually! Very realistic and touching, too. I'm looking forward to reading more of your works!

User avatar
summerlovee
Review
summerlovee wrote a review Review · Nov 5, 2014

Hello :)
I really like these lyrics because it is really well written. I can get a grasp on what this person is going through/feeling (I wasn't sure if this was about you and I didn't want to assume that so hence I used the word person :/ ). I especially liked these two lines:

"The drops of sarcasm that come from my lips

Are like like cobwebs, setting the way for me to trip"

So, so, so clever.

One tiny last thing, you forgot to put question marks at the end of these lines:

"Am I really too far gone

Am I just a broken doll"

Anyways, I enjoyed reading these lyrics and thank you for sharing it :)



A memorandum isn't written to inform the receiver, but to protect the writer.
— Dean Acheson