Forever rewrite chapter 4 by Alice — Novel / Chapter

But did

Don't start a sentence with an interjection.

paranoia, he

Semi-colon instead of a comma.

her, and

Take out And and replace the comma with a semi-colon.

tomorrow, and

No comma.

He would take her to the club tomorrow, and tell her then. Right after he bribed DJ into playing her favorite song.

Combine these two sentences.

her, and

No comma.

played, they

Semi-colon.

He didn’t care what game he played, they were all mind numbing at three in the morning. So any game would do.

Combine these two sentences.

up, and

No comma.

groaned, why’d

Semi-colon.

yeah. Last

Capitalize the Y in Yeah.

Oh well

Comma and add Are after it.

you knew

Capitalize the Y in You.

He glanced at his mom, she was preparing his weekly chores list.

"He glanced at his mom, who was preparing his weekly chores list."

makin

Makin'

damn it really was

Take this out.

II’ll

I'll

Okay bye

Comma after Okay.

The three tasks he set forth on first. Eagerly anticipating the night.

Combine this two sentences.

I liked it.

Forever rewrite chapter 4