As children, we were immune to heat
Our feet bare on the warm concrete
Playing long hours under the scorching Sun
Tagging friends 'it', we'd tirelessly run
Card games with family, calling each other's bluff
We'd spread sheets on the floor- & that'd be enough
Grandma would play the harmonium while aunts danced
Uncles would sing while the kids clapped, entranced
Father would give me a hose to water the floor
Mischief glistening in my eye, I'd make it pour
I'd make a run for it before he found the mess
He caught me and pulled my ear, nevertheless
Dumb charades with cousins in the backyard
Playing 'Geography' & digging out our inner bard
The cheating accusations mid game would fly wild
So immersed as to forget the burning ground tiled
Oh, to be a child again!
Laughing every second in vain
No warm concrete could ever prevent
A kid from living, to the greatest extent
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139,209 Literary Works • 672,509 Reviews
One of my favorite poems so far. I just love being a kid. I hope I'm not trying to sound like a pick me, but I enjoy my childhood. Being a grownup is kind of scary and I'm sort of not prepared for it.
Oh, to be a child again!
Laughing every second in vain
No warm concrete could ever prevent
A kid from living to the greatest extent
I'm still a kid but I feel like I'm getting older by each second. Every responsibility, every breakup, every heartache. Responsibilities pile up, emotions get heavier, and sometimes it feels like the innocence of childhood slips away too fast.
The memories that you described in your poem of childhood kind of reminded me of mines. I remember waking up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons on my mom's old tv.
There’s something magical about being young—about waking up without worries, about laughing at the smallest things, and about feeling like the world is full of endless possibilities. Saturdays to watch cartoons on my mom’s old TV. The screen was fuzzy, the sound was crackly, but it didn’t matter. I was happy. I was safe. I was home.
Overall, a very good poem, and I'm glad someone finally understands how precious childhood is.
Looking back, I realize how much those simple moments—like chasing bubbles, drawing with chalk, or building forts—shaped who I am today.
Alex, I absolutely loved this!
I don't see many poem like this with such good rhyming (and rhyme-schemes), and well, thought-out stanzas. This kind of perfect, skippy poem structure is usually something you'll see in books for middle-school literature, where the teacher will have you analyse every little thing.
Contrary to that, I think this is not a poem to be savored but rather one to be read freely and lightly. Let me elaborate: instead of focusing too much on deep meanings, one can instead use this as a backdrop to recall their own childhood, that was once also filled with the sting of warm concrete and the pull of sunny smiles. The simple words that you used to rhyme this poem is what really ties it together.
My favourite part, however, is the nostalgic vibe of the poem. Most of my works are all about nostalgia and reminiscing the old times, and this poem thus comes close to my heart. Personally, what ties together nostalgia and old memories is the presence of the sun or the haze of sunlight, somewhere at the edge of the memory where the objects blur but the light stays.
To sum it up, Good job! Seeing as you're quite new, I can't wait for what else you'll write <33
Hey, there! Yes I can see clearly, you get exactly what I was trying to convey. It's a pieces to skim through and unexpectedly get reminded of all your childhood memories against the similiar backdrop. As someone who loves the simplicity yet meaningfulness of middle school literature, it was a huge compliment. I wanted this poem to free the reader and not bind. I'm glad to hear I was successful in achieving so. Thank you for giving this a read and dropping a heartwarming review!
Hello hello!
I'm Logan, and I'm going to review your wonderful poem!
When I look at a poem first, I scan for length. Not for length of poems, but for stanza length. This helps to determine how well distributed the lines are. While some poems go best with uneven stands lengths, others are best with it. It's a matter of brownie points, seeing if it just so happens to go with the poem. When seeing yours, I saw five stanzas, each with four lines. This gives a more structured vibe, meaning that seeing that would make you think that's how the poem would be. As I read it, I saw that this structure definitely works with your poem!
As I read the first two lines, I immediately noticed the rhyming scheme! Every set of two lines rhymes, which works great with the four lines per stanza structure. I congratulate you in finding such great rhymes that also fit what you're trying to show! It can be a bit of a pain to figure them out, and I'm sure you spent a good bit of time and effort on that!
Getting into the poem itself, I love how you presented things that many children or you did in your childhood. While I have no clue what "Playing 'Geography'" is, it certainly is a great detail! How you explained playing tag was different from how I've ever seen it, which I think is extra clever.
I see that you have some themes for each stanza. The first one is about the sun and warmth, the third contrasting that and being about making a mess with the hose. The second shows activities done surrounded by family, which adds a nice split between the first and third. The fourth seems to give off a more miscellaneous vibe, but it can be assumed that it's about playing outside. What makes it confusing is the double meaning behind charades, meaning both the game and unconvincable actions. Once you figure this out, the theme can be taken from playing outside to cheating in games. The last stanza is about not having the same things as one did in childhood.
Overall, awesome job with keeping it flowing with each of these elements. I liked all the lines, so I couldn't quite pick a favorite for this review! I hope to review more of your amazing works!
Have an awesome day/night,
Logan!
Hey, Logan! Thanks a lot for this awesome review. I loved how thorough it was and discussed many technical aspects. Believe it or not, this was one of my least time consuming works, taking only a few hours. It was one of those days I was consumed with poetry, what can I see. Geography is a fun game you play in a group, otherwise also known as Atlas. Basically you have to name countries that start with the last initial of the country the player before you said. Like- I say Finland and you say Denmark then I say Kuwait and so on. I loved your complex interpretation for dumb charades but i only meant for it to be a light hearted memory. Cheating isn't promoted of course, but that was the way me and my cousins would entertain ourselves. It's all harmless fun really. Also, I'm glad you enjoyed my work, thank you again!