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16+ Violence Mature Content

the_highschoolparty

by AkuRashomon


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence and mature content.

My rager teenager,

In a high school party,

The blood in your veins run high

As each of your peers approach you

They drink whiskey in plastic cups,

And are getting high on Mary Jane

As she dances in the air and on the table

The music blares in your ears

You stand in one corner of the room,

Feeling fear, dread and uneasiness

With the atmosphere and the people

And their actions toward you

You have no one to run to

You want to call your mom but 

You’re too shy to ask because

You just entered a few seconds ago

Your vision blurs and turn bloodshot

The loud music fades away

A piercing sound in heard from a distance

It grows louder and unbearable

You run to the bathroom

But your vision stays blurry

The heartbeat found your head

You head spins a roller coaster

You lose your balance

Bumping your head on the floor tiles

You really want to call your mom

You want to get rid of the sounds in your ears

You panic, you scream to call for help

You can’t see anything,

No one comes to you for help

You feel you’ll just die there

Laying on the wet floor

You try to stand and balance yourself

The colors of the galaxy in your eyes

Scrambled in abstract

The colors fade away

But the ringing in your ear is still there

You see a light from a distance

And say your last breath, “Mom?”

Note: this is a fictional poem that my fictional character wrote right after being exposed to drugs in a high school party she went to.


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12 Reviews

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Thu Sep 28, 2023 1:31 pm
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Kz wrote a review...



I posted this is the wrong place I'm so sorry




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Wed Aug 02, 2023 9:57 pm
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Ki1roy says...



Hi, Kilroy here,
I think this is a good poem that show cases that you needed to be careful at prates or something like this could happen to you. I also hope the drugs did not mess the main character up for life, and that she/he is ok.




AkuRashomon says...


she is totally ok and yes, I know. thanks for the reminder<33



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Mon Jul 31, 2023 7:03 pm
ayelenwritesstuff wrote a review...



Hi! Ayelen here! I loved the middle to end bits where I could really feel the nausea and dizziness. I'm a little lost on when your character ingests the drugs, however, as it's never described and you write that your character only entered a few seconds ago. And quick grammar, "But you vision stay blurry" should be "stays". Love the poem! Excellent cadence!




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8 Reviews

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Mon Jul 31, 2023 7:03 pm
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ayelenwritesstuff says...



Hi! Ayelen here! I loved the middle to end bits where I could really feel the nausea and dizziness. I'm a little lost on when your character ingests the drugs, however, as it's never described and you write that your character only entered a few seconds ago. And quick grammar, "But you vision stay blurry" should be "stays". Love the poem! Excellent cadence!




AkuRashomon says...


thanks! nice catch<3



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Mon Jul 31, 2023 1:29 am
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GengarIsBestBoy wrote a review...



Howdy hey! Gengar here to leave a review!

I liked the emotion and action portrayed in the poem. The beginning describes the feelings of nervousness and embarrassment as the main character is surrounded by new people; the middle/end describe their sudden dizziness and slow death.

I think you could improve on this particular line, as it is somewhat confusing:

As she dances in the air and on the table


Who is the “she” here? Is she supposed to be a personification of the smoke from the weed mentioned in the previous line? Or is she another teenager at the party?

I hope my review could be helpful! Keep up the good work!

—GengarIsBestBoy




AkuRashomon says...


The she in the poem is "Mary Jane", it's like a metaphor for the drug. I hope this helps with your understanding <33 thanks for the review!



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Sun Jul 30, 2023 7:32 pm
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Kaia says...



I'm not going to review this just because I don't have much to say. But I did really like this poem. Your character is talented. ;)

Favorite line:

Laying on the wet floor.
Very nice descriptive bit there. :)




AkuRashomon says...


thanks[:



Kaia says...


You welcome. :)




The first thing I do when I have a good quote is always to put a goat in it. uwu
— Liminality