16+ Violence

Black Eyes Chapter 4: The Earthshifter

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence.


Tiring days of long journey brought them to their next checkpoint, a famous place on the map, Rock Village. On finishing miles of hilly grounds spiked with dangerously sharp rocks, the gates were just up ahead. The exhausted lads, whose faces hadn’t changed in days, walked toward the gates with no intention of being held up by stupid guards. According to Kyle’s map reading, going through the village was the shortest route to Magma Town. From what they could see beyond the steel gates, everything in the village was made of stone.

One of the guards rose quickly and walked up to greet them, an unfriendly look on his face, as was common amongst guards everywhere. “What business do you travellers have with the Rock?”

“We only wish to pass through,” Lex told him.

“No one ‘passes through’ the village of stone,” the man answered sternly, “it is not a public road. Turn back and take another route.” Kyle looked closely at the other guards back at the gate. They wore shabby brown uniforms, and though they were all armed with swords, they didn’t quite strike him as skilled swordsmen. Then again, their level of skill wouldn’t stop Kyle from fighting them to get through the village.

“Come on! Please! We walked from Metal City to get here, now let us by! We won’t cause any trouble!” Lex pled.

“Or maybe we will!” Kyle blasted, drawing his sword hastily. The guards drew their swords in preparation, standing quickly. In a moment, something happened that frightened Kyle and Lex, something that seemed stranger even that magic, or probably it was magic. A man appeared from beneath the earth amongst the readied guards. He just came up from under the stony soil!

“You are dismissed, gentlemen,” he told them, looking straight forward at the petrified boys.

“Yes sir,” the guards answered in unison, and left through the gates to a nearby guard post.

The man before them was well dressed in red and brown robes, and was no doubt a nobleman and leader in the village. “My name is Abora, better known as Groundavour, leader and protector of this sacred village,” the man introduced, sounding quite affable and friendly. Kyle just stared at him with narrowed eyes, still gripping his sword tightly.

“Greetings,” Lex responded to the polite leader, “our apologies for the scuffle a while ago – we just want to pass through. We’re headed to Magma Town, and time might be against us.” An expression of deep thought came upon the man’s face, like he was wondering about the probability of what Lex said being true.

“Your names.”

“Lex.”

“...Kyle.”

“You kid, you drew your sword to fight seven guards, and you didn’t look too worried either,” the man said, looking at Kyle. “You two must be at least a bit stronger than you look.” He dipped into his robes and took out a small golden ball with tiny writings on it. “Survive five minutes – you’ll get all the food you need, a good night’s sleep, and you’ll be outta here by sunup,” the man said. Lex and Kyle glanced at each other, then they looked back at the man before them. They nodded in agreement. Seems they are even familiar with subdimensional balls, Abora thought, this is the quickest way of getting to know just who these kids are. He squeezed the ball, and the three appeared in a different world.

As far as their eyes could see, the entire place was made of rock. There were stones and boulders and mountains of hard rock everywhere. Sun pelted the ground from the cloudless orange sky. Kyle and Lex stood back to back, turning, casting their eyes everywhere in search for their opponent. Lex had already readied an iceball. He saw Groundavour appear from the earth a few meters before him. He tossed the iceball immediately. A simple hand gesture was enough to defend against the elementary attack. The man raised his right hand slightly and a wall of rock came up from the ground at his defence. Mist and dust created a cloudy scene as the iceball blasted and quickly froze the slab of stone. Then, Groundavour made an impossible-looking movement around the wall. With his arms folded, and with no visible body movement, the veteran shifted the earth beneath his feet seamlessly to carry him around the wall.

“Icemaker, eh?” he smiled a bit, “It should be fun to toy with you a while.” Kyle faced the enemy, and he and Lex witnessed another of his abilities. The earth suddenly cracked around him in a circle. Then, he was swiftly carried into the air, standing on the uprooted slab of earth. The lads looked up at the man in the air standing on the massive piece of earth, soil dropping down from it. Finally, he unfolded his arms. Things were about to get serious. He made a motion like he was telling a church congregation to stand. There was no church there to obey him, but rocks rose up from the ground with a sense of urgency, stones of varying sizes and shapes, dozens of them. In a second or so, the rocks encircled him. “Now witness the power of an earthshifter!” the now nearly eccentric-looking man roared. In rapid succession, the levitating stones fired down at the boys. They moved at incredibly dangerous speeds, but Kyle matched this with his own quickness, shattering each projectile that came toward them, defending Lex and himself. Dust and tiny rocks flew in their faces, but minor things like that had to be ignored. All this time, Lex was condensing a heavy iceball. “Good work, Kyle, but you’re a roach in a cockfight!” Groundavour declared.

“I’ll shove those words up your ass, old man!” Kyle blasted, the insult piercing him. Before the trash talk could proceed, Lex took a forward step around Kyle, sending his iceball up at the airborne Earthshifter. The alert fighter took a backward leap from the slab of rock, somersaulted and landed on the ground, displacing rock almost as it were water. Kyle and Lex jumped back forcefully to avoid the massive rock, already coated in ice. With the same illogical movements and no visible effort, Groundavour moved himself around the massive rock, summoning up before him another huge boulder from the earth with simple hand movements, sending it at Kyle and Lex with great force by simply pushing his hand forward. They threw themselves in different directions quickly, dodging the boulder narrowly. A second after, Groundavour sank down into the earth, and in the latter part of the same second, he appeared from the ground right before Kyle and grabbed his neck. In fright, Kyle released his sword as he ascended through the air on a meagre piece of rock with the enemy.

“This piece o’ rock ain’t big enough for the two of us!” Groundavour made him aware, the stone still rising fast, carrying them higher and higher. Lex looked up at the rising rock, shielding his eyes from the direct sunlight, puzzled as to how he could assist Kyle. On the high floating rock began quick, desperate close combat. Kyle ducked, evading another of the man’s punches, and answered with a frighteningly powerful uppercut, then a couple of hard punches in the gut. The Earthshifter kneed Kyle hard in the belly, right in the ribcage. The boy groaned in awful pain, but kept his balance, looking down on the far-away ground. Groundavour sent another kick at Kyle, certain it would get him off the rock. Kyle sidestepped swiftly, almost setting foot off the rock, then he made a high jump kick, landing his foot heavily in the man’s chest, sending him meters from the rock into the air. Kyle, though, would have his fair share of trouble. The rock he was on began to obey the law of gravity.

The Earthshifter landed and crouched down on all fours on another slab of rock that rose from the ground to rescue him at his command. With quick thinking and almost perfect judgment, Kyle made an impressive leap toward Groundavour’s rock. He clung to the edges of it tightly, barely making it, as the rock he jumped from fell quickly. Upper body strength got him up fast enough. The rock was now about ten meters from ground. Lex smiled and sighed, glad that Kyle was skilful enough to save himself once again, but the signs of strain were still on his face. He was keeping together a now violently vibrating iceball, well ready for action, still forcing more energy into it. “Just gimmie a good strike…” he said under his breath. Kyle rammed two hard punches into the opponent, then another, almost cracking his jawbone. The man staggered back dizzily, almost falling off the rock. He lost control of the floating platform and it began to plummet. Kyle took a backward jump off the rock, making a harder landing than he had expected on his hands and feet. The Earthshifter managed to jump off the rock just before it landed and shattered. His back was turned to Lex, who wasn’t too far from him. The Icemaker wouldn’t hesitate to exploit his chance to strike. He sent the ball with speed and accuracy, and in the next moment, he and Kyle stared at a huge block of ice.

“Nice work,” Lex heard a voice from behind. He turned around, seeing the earthshifter on all fours, soil and tiny stones just falling off him. He was panting, and looked exhausted. Still, he had a smile of satisfaction on his face. “To be honest, Icemaker, I forgot about you for a second there. I’m afraid my words against Kyle are almost touching my stomach.” Kyle laughed. “Even tired and hungry, you two offer a good fight. The next time I challenge you, I hope you’ll be at your best, ‘cause I won’t hold back.” With that, the world of stone disappeared.

The smiling man returned the subdimensional ball to his bosom and laughed a bit. “Thank you both. Come with me.” Kyle and Lex followed the noble and powerful man through the village. Lex especially had a million questions to ask. They looked about and observed the magnificent structures made of stone. It seemed like a peaceful utopia. As he walked amongst the common people, they greeted their leader and he greeted them. There was no ‘Sir’ or ‘Your Majesty’ or ‘Oh King Live Forever’.

“I am most curious to know how an Icemaker found his way here all the way from Iceland, but more importantly, what would bring you two to Magma Town?”

“We are going to the prison there,” Lex told him. The earthshifter laughed heavily, probably assuming it was a joke.

“You two wanted?” He calmed his laughter suddenly as he saw the boys were not amused.

“My sister. She was taken.” The man stopped walking abruptly, then proceeded again.

“Taken?”

“Yes, captured by some masked assassin, probably working for King Aragan,” Lex answered.

“Hmmm…. What would he want with her?”

“… She’s a witch,” Lex answered. Kyle gave his friend a fierce glance.

“I see… I wish I could help you, but I’m tied down here. I’m my people’s only defence.” As they walked, Lex and Kyle caught the stares of people. “Don’t mind them,” the village leader said, picking up on this, “it’s not every day outsiders get to pass through this village… So, Icemaker, witch, swordsman… not an everyday combination of kids.”

“That’s because we’re fated to save the world,” Lex said.

“Heh… Save the world from what?”

“Trium.” They continued walking in silence for quite some time.

“Heard those myths once or twice… Indeed there’s something in the stories about an Icemaker with some demon… some nonsense like that… But I’m pretty sure the gods of history killed Trium ages ago.”

“It’s no myth,” Lex said, sounding defensive, “and those aren’t stories, they’re prophecies.”

“… We’re here,” Abora announced. Lex and Kyle stared up at the spectacular tower of rock.

Damn, that thing’s scrapin’ the moon, Kyle thought.

“Amazing!” Lex gave out.

“Heh. Thank you. I prefer something more modest, but they insisted. Hang tight.” Kyle grabbed Lex, who nearly fell off the quickly rising platform of stone. The elevator rose quickly, taking them to the highest room in the tower. They stepped off into a balcony, and the platform turned to soil and fell back to the earth.

“Hm. Sure beats climbing,” Kyle said.

Set up at four points of the circular room were huge spyglasses. The intrigued Icemaker rushed over to one of them and held it to the height of his eye. He quickly found the knob at the side and magnified it to its maximum zoom. “Wow!” He gazed out at an entire village. He saw tiny people moving about, and little houses.

“The north glass there is pointed to Zakashi Village,” the man informed. Kyle peered through another of the glasses, quickly adjusting it.

“And this place I see is Silver Town.”

“That’s right,” Abora confirmed, sounding a little impressed.

“And the other two are pointed at Sansuri and Twin Towns,” Kyle showed his knowledge.

“Heh. You sure know your stuff, kid.”

“Abora, tell me, are you the only earthshifter around here?” Lex asked, “For how long have you led this village?”

“…Let me enlighten you two a little on something that I’m certain is no myth… Long ago, there were four villages, peaceful peoples. Their leaders were humble, but great they were. Mother Nature was pleased with them, and appeared to each of them in the form of a beautiful woman. She told each of them to meet with her at a certain place at midnight. Midnight came, and the four kings met, disgruntled to find one another there, each thinking to keep this beautiful princess for himself. The fair princess appeared amongst them, and explain that she was an embodiment of nature itself, and she was already taken; her husband was Time. She told them that she had gathered them to grant them divine power. The age of Kizer and Oga, the most powerful men this world will ever see, was long long gone, but these four kings were descendants of the sons of Kizer, and she found them deserving of the power that had become so weak throughout the generations that it was dissolved to nothing. One of the kings were given the power to control the air, and was given a talisman with the symbol of an eagle. Another was given the power to control water, and given a talisman depicting waves. Another king was given the power to control the earth around him, and was given a talisman with a mountain carved on it. The fourth king was granted the power to create and manipulate fire, and given a talisman with a flame on it.” Lex stared at the talisman Abora wore about his neck, just noticing it.

“They were told that it was their duty to pass on their power to a trusted companion before they die, but there was one requirement, the person had to have been at least ten years beneath them in age. Decades passed, and each of the kings ably used their powers to protect and defend their villages. Now, there was a great man by the name of Balaski. He served the Air Village exceptionally, but he served the Water Village as well. His plan was to have both village leaders pass down to him their elemental powers. Then, he would merge both villages and rule over them. He would then be powerful enough to annihilate the Fire and Earth villages, and rule the only village will elemental prowess. In time, both kings did pass their powers to the same man unknowingly, and Balaski could bend both air and water to his will. Also, he discovered the daughter element of both primary elements, and was the first Icemaker to exist in thousands of years.” Lex eyes glistened in discovery.

“So while his counterparts were the kings of fire and earth, he alone was the king of water, air and ice,” Kyle said.

“Right. Now, Habon, the leader of the fire village, was jealous of Balaski’s great power, and planned an attack on the mighty Ice Village. Balaski suffered an awful burn on fighting the king of fire himself, from which he knew he would never recover. Balaski’s men carried him to his tower in haste. One of the men, on looking through a spyglass, announced that Magmalian soldiers were approaching in great numbers. It seemed Habon had planned to attack with a mighty ally, but was too jumpy to wait for them to appear. The then king of Magma Land, Oziah Aragan, had his own reason to attack the Ice Village, and used Habon’s attack to his advantage. Oziah and his men marched in to wipe out the weakened village, which was an eyesore of power to him. The dying Balaski called for his son to be taken to him. Servants rushed to the well-secured baby boy and carried him to his father. Magmalian soldiers were closing in on the village from every angle.

“Against the advice of his men, Balaski transferred his power to his son. His right hand scolded him for being a selfish fool, giving the village’s power to a five-year-old in a desperate time of war. ‘My wife! Get my wife!’ the king ordered, and he gave her their child. ‘He has the power,’ he struggled to tell her, and gave her the talisman of ice, one he had made by combining both the water and air talismans. The crying, panicking woman grabbed the talisman from her husband and king. ‘The Magmalians are in the village!’ one of the men announced. The king called Mikah to him, his best friend since childhood days. He uttered his last command to him, to flee with his wife and son, and marry the woman, and father his child. The man obeyed with honour, barely escaping the plunging village. Only moments later, the Magmalians had invaded even the royal tower. The Magmalian king grabbed the dying Balaski, and ordered him to give him the power of ice in exchange for his life. With his last bit of strength, the ice king tried to kill Oziah. The Magmalian threw him over his own tower to his death. The great Ice Village was flattened, and nothing except the few who fled was left of the great people. Oziah, as he had planned from the beginning, that same day destroyed the weakened Fire village, stealing the power of fire.

“In all this, the village in the rocks stood firm. Up until now we’ve lived here. The power of earthshifting was passed down Tolomose, to Bensigui, Zakishu, Maliki, Quartzaldo, Beljium, Monach, Karada, Karakas, Canaan, Ianah, my father, and then to me, Abora, leader of the Rock Village, which not even the great Magma Town dares to attack even to this day.”

Comments & reviews · 3
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User avatar
Kale
Review
Kale wrote a review · Sun Mar 30, 2014 10:42 pm

Hello there, AdjiFlex. I, a bold Knight of the Green Room, am here to review you on this fine Review Day. I hope you don't mind.

I should also note that I haven't read any of the previous parts, so if I bring up something already addressed earlier in the story, feel free to disregard it.

With that said, there seems to be a missing image or something at the start of this chapter? There's a mysterious little gray box there, and I'm not sure what it's supposed to be, but if you can, I'd recommend deleting it since it's a bit distracting from the story itself.

Your paragraphing also seems to have been eaten, and there's a lot of really big blocks of text. It might be a pain to do, but I would strongly encourage you to go back through and add the paragraph breaks back in. Not only will it make this chapter easier to read, but it will also make your writing look more polished, which is always a plus when it comes to attracting and keeping readers.

Something else to keep an eye out for is the consistency of your dialogue. One particularly obvious example of inconsistent dialogue is Abora saying "you’ll be outta here by sunup". Since he's been introduced as being high class and spoke more formally up until that point, having him use "outta", which is slang, feels very out-of-character, even though he's just been introduced. Dialogue plays a huge part in characterization, and ideally, your readers should be able to distinguish characters based entirely on their dialogue, without any need for dialogue tags. Right now, with how the dialogue is inconsistent, all the characters sound basically the same, and so they can't be distinguished without the dialogue tags.

One last thing: the telling of the story was quite awkward, especially with how there was dialogue within the dialogue. I think it would be much better if a simplified version of events was relayed, much like stories usually are told, with bits of description and action to break up the telling. The first chunk of story is a pretty good base to follow off of, style-wise, and while you do break up the telling a little with some character actions, it's not enough to keep things interesting. Incorporating more of the characters' actions into the telling would go a long way in making it more interesting.

Thanks much! Lovely review! Hope you read and review more of my work.

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Iggy
Review
Iggy wrote a review · Sun Mar 30, 2014 10:26 pm

Greetings! Happy Review Day. ^^

First off, I apologize for not reading the parts before this chapter. So bear with me if I get lost or get something wrong.

Your character development is awesome, from what I've seen. It looks to me as if Lex is the levelheaded one and Kyle is the hothead. Lex is there to think rationally, whereas Kyle is impulsive and relies on fighting to get what he wants. Having these two on a journey together works wonders, because they help balance each other's personalities and also, they play off of each other's strengths. Without Kyle, Lex would've been killed a long time ago; and without Lex, Kyle would've been killed a long time ago. They basically are keeping each other alive. xD

I love the fight. It was laced with a lot of vivid imagery and action and details, and it was described in a simple way that was easy to follow and easy to understand.

Overall, this looks like it's getting very good. It makes me want to read all of it fro the beginning and that's what I will do sometime soon ^^ Thanks for sharing!

Thank you! I do hope you continue to read and review my story :)

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rainbowcabbit
Review

Hello! Nice story you got here, shame I didn't read the other two chapters, but its better than not reviewing any. From what I have seen, you have perfect work! I couldn't see any spelling mistakes and I could understand it perfectly, though I didn't read the other chapters. You have great pacing and descriptions. I especially love the trash talk between Kyle and Abora, that was hilarious. My only issue is just the personal issue of not liking third person omniscient because I do not like third person and usually third person omniscient can become confusing especially with a lot of characters with the same pronouns, but you managed it quite well. Keep writing, you are doing great! I hope other people review your work, you are quite good :D

Thank you, rainbow. I will keep posting. I do hope you read more of my work. I will certainly check your literature out.

Please do :D No-one checks out anything of mine. And Ill read the rest.



Almost all absurdity of conduct rises from the imitation of those whom we cannot resemble.
— Samuel Johnson