Slowly she crumbles away
Yet even as bricks and mortar plunge seaward,
The lighthouse stands proud
Like a queen in chess nearing her end.
-
Breeze ruffles the lapping waves
And the lighthouse croons
As it slips through her windows into empty rooms
Dusty with forgotten pasts.
-
The years crawl by,
Paint chips and hinges rust
Yet she remains
Ever vigilant,
Ever watchful
Until nothing is left on the hilltop
But warm thoughts gone stale.
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138,321 Literary Works • 672,102 Reviews
Hi... i'm just here to review.... I promise i don't write mean ones
I have to say your poem has a lot of emotion behind it.
When you describe it.... there's so much ..... idk the word i'm looking for
When you say
"Yet she remains
Ever vigilant,
Ever watchful" it gives off a feeling that i cannot describe in words. Overall It was an amazing poem and I cant wait for another one by You
Thank you for your review!
Hey, Euphoria here! And omg, I love this poem so much! Especially since it's focused a whole lot on nature and I'm here for it
I think my favourite part of this poem is the way you personified the lighthouse as confident, observant and proud till the very end. It really brought this beautiful poem to life.
"Like a queen in chess nearing her end."
My favourite line!
I also love the verb-noun combinations you've used in this poem: crawling years, breeze ruffling the sea waves, slipping through windows (it's always the little things for me)
All I would suggest is to only capitalize words that come after a period and not every word that comes in the next line.
Thanks for sharing (and revising it!) and keep growing <3
Thank you for your review! I'm so glad you liked the descriptions
As for the capitalization, I've always done that as a stylistic choice. Most of the poems I've read are done that way so I've sort incorporated it into my poems as well.
You're most welcome! Oh, I'm new here so I didn't know it was intentional, apologies! I have to say, I secretly like it myself hehe XD