Young Writers Society

Home » Literary works » Other » Humor

E - Everyone

Inside Out and Outside In

by DeerInBacPac


Inside-out

Is the same as

Outside-in.

~~~

Think about that.

They are the same thing. 

Who knew? 

I bet the Doctor did. 

Okay, seriously. This is on the literally spot light and I wrote this in about two minutes. WHYYY?

Other than that please tell me what you think about this poem and how it makes you feel.


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
58 Reviews


Points: 199
Reviews: 58

Donate
Fri Nov 17, 2017 5:09 pm
IzzyIsHappy says...



YES
YES
YES




DeerInBacPac says...


NO joke its about Its about shirts and shoes and when they are inside out and outside in and how those two things mean the same thing.



User avatar
14 Reviews


Points: 490
Reviews: 14

Donate
Wed Oct 25, 2017 2:48 pm
noelani2004 says...



At first, when
I read the title, I thought that this was going to be a very deep subject. However when I started to read it I became confused.My guess is that it is based on popularity, but I still don't get it how is it humorous.




DeerInBacPac says...


Its about shirts and shoes and when they are inside out and outside in and how those two things mean the same thing.



User avatar
57 Reviews


Points: 1435
Reviews: 57

Donate
Mon Oct 23, 2017 6:20 pm
View Likes
Saruka wrote a review...



Hi Flumadiddle! Saru here for a hopefully helpful review!
I'm going to get constructive criticism out of the way first so we can get on with what was great about this.

Inside-out

It is the same as

Outside-in.

To me, it felt like this section kind of should have the flow of a sentence. To create that effect, you may want to put a dash after "Inside-out" or take the "it" out.
Maybe the Doctor did.

This is great, but it might be even more final if you said, "I bet the Doctor did. "

And... that's it for constructive criticism! I liked this, it was a great concept, and obviously there wasn't much to try and correct.

Keep writing!

*pretend the KOTGR icon is here, I lost the picture*




DeerInBacPac says...


Thank you! I will fix things immediately.



Saruka says...


Welcome!



DeerInBacPac says...


:)



User avatar
206 Reviews


Points: 0
Reviews: 206

Donate
Mon Oct 23, 2017 6:15 pm
DeerInBacPac says...



@DemonGoddess I fixed some things and I believe I managed to slip in a reference. :P




zaminami says...


oHHHHH



DeerInBacPac says...


:)



User avatar
364 Reviews


Points: 15980
Reviews: 364

Donate
Mon Oct 23, 2017 6:02 pm
View Likes
zaminami wrote a review...



Hello Flumadiddle! Welcome to YWS! Kara here for a (hopefully) quick review!

Give me your soul.

With that aside, I'm not the best at poetry but here we go!

Bold = grammar and flow issues.
Italics = suggestions and overall
Strikethrough = remove
Underline = krazy Kara komments.

Spoiler! :
Inside out is the same as {outside in}. Think about that. They are the same thing.

{A/N: }I don't regret this post for one second. Haha. {Italicize this if it's an author's note}


There isn't much to review here, since this is more of something you would make a wall post and not a full-fledged work, so I would recommend making this a poem, actually:

Inside out
Is the same as
Outside in.
--
Think about that.
They are the same thing.
{Insert funny comment here, like "mind blown"}


That is actually kind of funny and would give someone more to review with. Good job and keep up the great work! :D

Why haven’t you given me your soul yet? --

Kara

Image


This review courtesy of
Image




DeerInBacPac says...


I will make the poem change, seeming like that might make this sound better. Thanks kara!



zaminami says...


OH YESSSS THE DOCTOR



DeerInBacPac says...


:)



User avatar
206 Reviews


Points: 0
Reviews: 206

Donate
Mon Oct 23, 2017 5:31 pm



If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.
— Henry David Thoreau, "Walden"