E - Everyone

New Year part 2

Haley just ignored her and ran upstairs. “Guys, don’t worry, it probably was my picture that fell. I will put it back up.” Haley yelled.

Hank and James already found no onein the room but quickly put their guns back and James found the large picture and quietly picked it up and set it on the ground. As Haley came up she went over to the picture, picked it up and placed back on the hook.

“I didn’t think this hook was strong enough. I’m surprised it didn’t break. Thanks anyways for coming to investigate. Uncle Hank I think I heard Aunt Georgia say she needs help with dinner. Can you call us down when it’s done please.” Haley said.

“Oh, sure.” Hank said and winked,then went downstairs.

“Well, that was scary. I thought for a second someone was trying to break in.” Haley said.

“Yeah, good thing it was just the picture.” James said. ‘James if you can hear me cough.’ James coughed. ‘It actually was someone trying to break in. We don’t know who because they were wearing a mask, but someone did break in.’ Lyon said,

“So you said that your dad is in the army, has he visited lately?”

“Yeah, a few months ago, but even then I hardly see him. But, uh, we should go downstairs to see if they need any help?” James asked.

“Yeah you’re probably right.” Haley said. She stood up and went over to James and hugged him.

“What’s this for?”

“For being so brave with my uncle, and for being such a great friend.” Haley said. James and her eyes locked, he was falling for her, and he can’t. He can’t develop feelings for the girl he is supposed to be protecting. He took her hand and they walked downstairs together.

Georgia and Hank had prepared a lovely pasta dish with garlic bread and Caesar salad. As they finished Haley went to the bathroom and Hank went to the office and grabbed the diary and the recording to give to James. They told him to leave now, so she didn’t see him with the diary.

“Tell her I will pick her up at 2:30 tomorrow.” James said. He then left and went back to the CIA headquarters.

“Did James have to leave? Did he sayanything?” Haley asked.

“Yeah, he said to be ready at 2:30.”Hank told her.

They rest of them cleaned up and got ready for bed. Haley was so excited to be finally going out on a date. And if all went well, he might ask her out to prom next month.

Back at the CIA, James is reading through Haley’s diary.

‘Today I met this new guy, James. He is tall and sweet and has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. We have all but one class together, I feel like it’s fate orsomething that we met.’ “So she likes me, but uh what do I do?” James said to himself.

‘I also met this other guy, Logan, he is kind of a punk, but is kind of cute. One day he waited with me at the doors and said I was cute. Another day he was at the mall and we hung out for like 3 hours! He is such a rebel and he drives a motorcycle. If James doesn’t give me any signals soon that he likes me as well,I’m going to ask Logan to the dance. But my aunt and uncle would never let me go with him, so I will have to lie. Right now, I hope James gives me a signal.’James paused, and just read that same paragraph over and over again.

“What am I going to do? I can’t give her signals, though I want too. But if I don’t she will be going for this guy that I am pretty sure is no good. I have no idea what to do.” James said.

The next day Haley got up extra early to get ready for her date, but when she got up she realized she had broken her head board, and wrote down instructions in Korean to something. She didn’t even know she spoke Korean let alone write it. She just brushed it off and went back to picking out her outfit for the evening. She picked out this beautiful dress with baby blue ruffles on the bottom and a sparkle top, with a jean jacket and her black flats. It was 2:25 and the doorbell rang. Haley randown stairs and at the last 5 steps she leaped and landed perfectly on her feet.

“Since when am I an acrobatic?” Sheasked herself and laughed.

Hank and Georgia just stared at herwith wide open eyes; they couldn’t believe how fast she is progressing and without evening know it. Haley opened the door and there stood James.

“You ready? Let’s go or we will be late.” James said.

They both got in the car and before they took off James wanted Haley to know something.

“Look Haley, I have gotten the signs that you like me, and believe me I like you too, but I think we should stay friends. One reason is that I can’t date and we haven’t known each other very long, but I still want to hang out with you and be friends. Is that okay?”James said.

“Wow, I can’t believe you just told me that. I totally would have been fine with staying friends but then you go say you ‘can’t date’. How cliché that just means you never liked me at all. Was this just a game? Were you just leading me on? You know what; I don’t want to know your answer. We can’t be friends, and I don’t want to see or talk to you ever again!” Haley yelled and then stormed out of the car.

“Haley, wait!” James screamed outfor her.

“Good bye James.” Haley said as she slammed the door. She was heartbroken. Everyone knows when a senior guy says they can’t date, that just means they aren’t into you at all. She ran up to her room in tears and locked the door.

Hank went outside to talk to James to find out what happened. It wasn’t James fault at all, but now they had to come up with another plan to keep her safe. “You go back and talk to your dad.”Hank said.

“My dad just told me to tell you to give Haley the necklace. What does that mean?” James asked Hank.

“Well we have this necklace with a GPS and a microphone planted in it, and we planned on giving it to her once she knew about everything and agreed to work with the CIA. But now since you can’t be with her all the time we should give it to her so in case she goes out with someone we know where she is.” Hank explained.

Hank walked back into his house and James drove off. Hank reached into the safe and grabbed the box with the necklace; he had to come up with a story on why he was giving her the necklace and why she should wear it.

“Haley, can I come in please?” Hank asked.

“Sure.”

“I spoke to James and he was a jerk for what he said. And the more I thought about it the more I thought about your mother.” Haley looked up at him with tears in her eyes. “I want to give you this necklace; it used to be your mothers. She wore this when she met your father, and the reason she knew your father was the one is when he commented on her necklace and got the gem stone right. It’s a very unique stone called Sunstone. It was very special to the both of them and I hope it will be the same special for you.” He said as he wiped her tears and put the necklace on her. She looks up at him and smiles.

“Thank you uncle Hank, I love it. But can I be alone right now. Please?” Haley asked.

“Sure thing sweetheart. I’m downstairs if you need anything.” Hank said as he closed the door behind him and went downstairs.

Haley started to cry softly and then felt all this anger just wanting and needing to be released. She felt suddenly strong but light on her feet. She then heard something be tossed at her window. She got up and went over to her window and opened it.

“Haley………..pssst…… down here!” Logan whispered.

“Logan? What are you doing here?”

“I was walking down the street whenI saw what happened with you and James. I just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

“Yeah I’m fine. Hey, have you everheard of the Young Rock club?”

“Yeah, it’s the under 18 club forteens. Why?”

“Let’s go. I’m coming down.”

“Okay.”

Haley put on her shoes grabbed her purse and started to climb out the window. She had told herself if James didn’t want her then she would go after Logan, who clearly wanted her.

“Just jump, I will catch you.” Jamessaid.

“No watch this.” Haley said as shejumped out of the second story window and landed perfectly on her feet without a scratch. “Ah, see? Suddenly I have become so agile. Let’s go!” Haley said as the two of them got onto Logan’s motorcycle and drove off. Haley didn’t think anyone would know where she was going, but one person did, James. James has the GPS tracker hooked up to his phone. Just as soon as he was going to go to bed his phone went off.

“What? Where is Haley going? Her aunt and uncle don’t allow late night trips, no matter what.” James said. He paused for a second thinking maybe Hank is taking her someplace to give her the necklace and then it hit him.

‘I’m going to ask Logan.’ “Oh crap! She is with Logan, I have to follow her.”James said. He ran out to his dad to tell him and his dad gave him the keys to the car and called in back up.

“I will alert Georgia and Hank, they will meet you at, where are they?” Lyon asked.

“Well according to this they have stopped and they are at Young Rock club. That’s where they are. Come on!” They all rushed out the door and drove to the club.

“Oh god, my aunt is calling me. She knows I snuck out.” Haley said.

Logan takes her phone and chucks it at the wall. “Sorry she is busy.” He laughs and takes Haley’s hand and runs into the ally.

“Oh haha I can’t believe you did that! I’m going to be in so much trouble, but I don’t care, I like breaking the rules.” Haley said.

“It’s a lot more fun to break the rules then follow them.” Logan said.

“There is another rule I want to break, and I have wanted to break it for a while.” Haley said. She looks at Logan and grabs his shirt and kisses him.

Comments & reviews · 2
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Brigadier
Review

Hey there maverymadams. It's just lizzy dropping by real quick, so without a further ado, let the reviewing begin.

1. When I found your chapter in the green room today the title seemed familiar, as did the characters and plot. I think I reviewed the first chapter a couple of months ago or at least read. I usually try and jump right into stories midway but I think in your story's case, it is necessary to read the previous chapters. There were a few things that I didn't like about you chapter, especially the length and flow.

2. I have mixed feelings on short-ish chapters because you never know how they will be written. Will they be short but really influential on the plot or will they be short and ever thing is shoved together? I've read a mixture of the two and I think your story falls in category number two. While reading you chapter, I was rushed from once place to another before I even found out where I was.

3. I also have a lot of questions on what I considered to be confusing parts of the story.
-The girl wakes up one morning, writes down a note and then finds out she knows Korean. There were lots of things here that bothered. One, she just casually brushed it off with just a little bit of recognition. Two, if she didn't know Korean then how did she know to distinguish the symbols from some other language like Mandarin. I took Mandarin for a couple of years and I know how closely the pictures line up with other languages.
-When she is able to leap down a flight of stairs again she doesn't even question it. From there she shows off this unknown ability to catch a guy's attention. It seems to me that she makes a lot of bad decisions throughout the chapter that should have never happened.
-Ot her situation with James. He had an entire intelligence agency behind him and they couldn't come up with one good scenario so that he would be able to maintain the friendship.

4. I always try and fit a couple of lines into my review somewhere about spelling and grammar. I didn't find anything major in your piece except for a couple of typos. You did a pretty good job proofreading so here's my seal of approval. :)

5. Sorry if this sounded super critical of the plot but it does need some improvement. I can't believe that no one had reviewed you work yet. Anyways, Happy Review Day.
-lizzy

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Eadyia Review
Eadyia wrote a review · Sun Jan 31, 2016 9:20 am

I think you might want to recheck if there is any error in your writing such as "Hank and James already found no onein the room.."
If you can put punctuation where needed so that the story could be easier to read and not too long a sentence that would make it better to read.
It would be nice if you can use other ways to express how or what things they are doing without using the same word over and over again. Its a bit annoying for me personally.



"Be yourself" is not advice. It's an existential crisis waiting to happen.
— Hank Green