Color Photographs, Chapter Fourteen

by Shady

Published December 26, 2015

In Color Photographs

Sadie was pacing like a caged animal. Karson’s anxiety continued to build as he watched her. Sadie had sworn years before that she’d never become a housewife, and made sure to keep herself busy with volunteer work, even though Meyer convinced her not to hold a job. Now that the initial shock had worn off, she was getting more and more restless with each day that passed.

“I don’t want to stay here.” Sadie stopped pacing long enough to peer out a window, at the empty street below. Karson didn’t answer. Sadie strode across the room and threw herself down on the couch, dramatically draping her arm over her face and sighing. “It’s such a beautiful day.”

Karson glanced at the door as he heard a key in the lock, but Sadie didn’t seem to notice. “Don’t you think you’re being slightly melodramatic?”

“I’m so booooored,” Sadie whined, drawing out her words.

Meyer swung the door open and walked in. “Well that sounds tragic.”

Sadie uncovered her face, but didn’t sit up. It was always a relief when Meyer came home in one piece. But his presence didn’t make her last statement any less true. “It is.” She hesitated a moment, then bounced upright. “You have pizza?”

“Yep,” Meyer smirked, setting the boxes down on the coffee table as he walked in. “Boring old pizza.”

“Better than boring old bologna,” Sadie said. She moved to the kitchen to grab some plates and drinks. Her side and face had been healing quickly, so now she could move mostly normally. The dark bags under her eyes betrayed that she hadn’t been sleeping well.

“True enough.” Meyer sat down on the couch, throwing his arm across the back of it in case Sadie decided she wanted to cuddle. Sadie sat down next to him and pretended she didn’t hesitate as she leaned in to give him a hug. Meyer pretended he didn’t see the hesitation.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” she said quietly. He pulled her slightly tighter towards his chest. She offered a small smile, then sat up again. “Okay, let’s get started on that pizza.”

“Sounds good,” Meyer said. They opened the box, and Sadie saw he’d gotten her favorite—bacon and mushrooms. She smiled and took a large slice.

Once they all had their pizza and were settling in to eat it, Karson started questioning Meyer. “So what’s the plan?”

“Well…” Meyer started slowly, looking between them. “Resnick went out of town an hour or two ago… he packed a bag and told me not to bother coming to work for the next few days.”

“You think he’s going to a meeting with the underwear guy?” Sadie asked.

“Yeah…” Meyer nodded. “I mean, he was careful to keep me in the dark as much as he could… but I think paying the kid a visit tonight would be a good next move.”

“Are we going right after dinner?” Sadie asked.

“Well… I am. I was thinking it would be safer if you and Karson headed up to the shack in the mountains.”

Sadie nodded, furrowing her brow at the top of the pizza box. She wanted to argue—to tell Meyer she’d go with him wherever he went, and help him hunt down the little punk and scare information out of him. But she figured Meyer knew best. If he was leaving her behind, she was sure he had a good reason for it. “I suppose you’re planning on going after Resnick tonight, then?”

“Well, it all depends on how it goes with the kid,” Meyer said carefully. He glanced up from his pizza and met Sadie’s worried gaze—she didn’t believe him. He shrugged. “Probably, though.”

She nodded and was silent for a long moment. As the pain in her side slowly subsided, she found herself more and more able to think of something other than the night with Resnick. And the more she thought, the more uneasy she was about Meyer working with Reneve. She couldn’t help but feel like none of them – Karl, Nate, or Ronny – could be taken at their word.

“I think I should go with you.”

“I think you shouldn’t.”

“What if Reneve pulls a gun on you again?” Sadie spoke her fear. “Didn’t he say he planned on it?”

“After Resnick was dead,” Meyer answered with a shrug. He pretended that Sadie’s fears were unwarranted, even though he’d been thinking the very same thing. He wasn’t so sure it was any safer to be on Reneve’s side than it would be to go up against Resnick alone. “It’ll be okay. I can handle Reneve.”

“Babe,” Sadie said, frowning at him. “I don’t like it. Let me go with you.”

“So he can pull a gun on you?” Meyer asked, shaking his head. “No.”

“I want to go with—” Sadie trailed off as a knock came at the door. She towards the door fearfully, instinctively reaching for the gun she’d carried ever since the incident. Meyer stood up and moved towards the door, pulling his pistol, but not looking particularly worried.

He cracked the door open, being sure his body was hidden, and peered out into the hall. A moment later he pulled the door all the way open. “Ah, right on time.”

“What’s this supposed to be?” An old man gestured at Meyer’s gun unhappily. “First you invite me up, then you start making threats on my life.”

“Mr. Joe!” Sadie sprang to her feet and practically ran to the door. The old man stepped inside with a broad smile, supporting his thin, feeble body with a wooden cane that looked as old as Sadie was herself. He had thick rimmed glasses with even thicker glass, which made his eyes look large and owlish. She wrapped her arms around him in a hug. “What are you doing here?”

“Well…” Mr. Joe hugged her back. “When my buddy didn’t come to see me, I figured I should go check on her.”

“Oh, yeah… sorry about that… I was…” Sadie hesitated, seeming to consider explaining what had happened. She regularly went to the library to help Mr. Joe with the shelving, and to talk literature with him. Meyer loved Sadie, but he wasn’t much of a reader.

“Don’t worry about it,” Mr. Joe said with a wink. “I’m here now. Did you bring up that book I told you to, Mr. Lovett?”

“I did,” Meyer said. He’d locked the door back and now moved across the room where he’d tossed his jacket down on the recliner. He picked up the edge and pulled a book out from under. “Here it is.”

“Please, have a seat,” Sadie offered, gesturing towards the couch. She wrapped her arm around the old man’s waist and carefully helped him to the couch, and made sure he was comfortable. As soon as he was seated so plopped down on the couch next to him. “What book did you bring?”

“It’s a new release. I got it on Monday… had it read by Tuesday night,” he answered with a smile. He was very old—probably well into his seventies—and barely had any hair left on his head. He had a few wispy strands of gray hair still clinging to the edges of his head, and a thin goatee on his face. “I’ve been going crazy all week, waiting to tell you about it.”

“Sounds good,” Sadie said with a smile.

Meyer watched his wife, relieved to finally see her smiling – actually smiling—once again. He figured if anyone could distract Sadie, it would be Mr. Joe. He’d been a librarian for longer than most of the people in this room had been alive. As a kid Sadie often went to visit Mr. Joe and listen to his stories. She’d escape to the library, just to get away from her house.

Meyer caught Karson’s eye, and silently called him over. The men walked into the bedroom, stealing one final glance at Sadie to be sure she was okay. She didn’t seem to really notice their absence, as she hung off of every word Mr. Joe read from his book.

“So you’re going after the kid?” Karson asked in a hushed voice. Meyer nodded. “I’m guessing I’m not helping?”

“Well I’m not leaving her with the old man for protection.”

“But the old man’s staying?”

Meyer nodded again. Turned and looked at his bedroom, trying to think if he would need anything for what was bound to be a long night away from home. He glanced back at Karson. “I’m planning on going straight after Resnick, once we know where he’s going… I’m not planning on bringing Sadie into the line of fire… and she’ll be much more willing to stay behind if she’s with Joe.”

“Makes sense,” Karson said, craning his neck so he could see into the living room. Sadie was still fixated on Mr. Joe’s every word, staring at his face in a mesmerized trance. He couldn’t help but wonder if this is what she’d looked like for the past twenty years – sitting with Mr. Joe, sometimes in clothes that fit, something wearing clothes much too small, sometimes bruised, sometimes not – listening while he made real life go away for a little while. “So we going to the hide out again?”

“Yep.” Meyer grabbed an extra box of ammo from his top drawer and headed back towards the living room. “And I’d like to get moving before dark.”

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Mr. Resnick drummed his fingers on his leg nervously, looking out the windows on either side of the car. The road was flat and dull, with a few passing vehicles on the left, and a view of long, empty fields to the right. He couldn’t help but feel that leaving Meyer behind was a bad idea.

As he set this meeting up with a potential buyer – a Cuban that was scouting out new territory for his family’s empire to expand – he knew for certain he didn’t want any Lovett to get in his way. He’d figured the easiest way to ensure Meyer wouldn’t mess anything up would be to leave him hours away, at home, with his wife.

But the look on his face when Resnick informed him that he wasn’t coming on this business trip wasn’t a friendly one. Resnick couldn’t help but feel like Meyer couldn’t just enjoy on a vacation with his wife—not now. If Meyer didn’t do something stupid before the night was through, Resnick would be quite surprised.

As if confirming his doubts, Resnick now looked down to see his phone vibrating with a call from one of the men he’d left to keep an eye on Meyer. He took a deep breath and answered the call, hoping that this call wouldn’t bring the news he thought it would. “What?”

“Hey boss. Karson, the girl, and some old man just got in Meyer’s car with him. They had a pizza, so I’m guessing they’re not just going out for a dinner.”

“Alright… keep an eye on them.” Resnick still was hoping against the odds. He’d do whatever he needed to, to keep himself and his business in good health. “If they go up that hill towards Meyer’s ‘secret’ hideout, call me back.”

“Yes, sir, Boss.”

Resnick hung the phone up and rubbed his face, staring out the window. “Don’t make me kill you, Meyer.”

Comments & reviews · 2
HopelessAbandon wrote a review Review · Feb 28, 2016

Hello!

Since I have not read the previous chapters, I'll mainly be looking for issues in grammar, sentence structure etc. rather than things like character development. I also apologize if I repeat something already mentioned in a previous review.

It was always a relief when Meyer came home in one piece. But his presence didn’t make her last statement any less true.

This sounds awkward. I suggest changing it to either one sentence, or changing the "But" to something like "However," to help with the flow.

so now she could move mostly normally

The "ly" at the end of two words in a row sounds strange. Changing it to "almost normally" or something would help with this.

“I’m planning on going straight after Resnick, once we know where he’s going… I’m not planning on bringing Sadie into the line of fire… and she’ll be much more willing to stay behind if she’s with Joe.”

The ellipse here sound a bit off. Using one instead of two would probably fix this, changing one to a comma or a period. It just doesn't sound how one would realistically speak the way it's written with the ellipse.

General:
The beginning of the chapter is a little choppy- your sentences are a bit short and the same length. However, by the middle of the chapter, you fixed that and it flows wonderfully for the most part.
Even though I haven't read any of the previous chapters, this was really interesting and kept me wanting to read until the end. It was well written for the most part and kept the suspense going steady. You did a pretty great job!
I really liked the last sentence of the chapter, it was a brilliant cliff hanger that wasn't too cliche.
This was good, and it has the potential to be pretty awesome with a few minor fixes. :D

Keep writing, and I hope this helps!
~Abandon

User avatar
BondGirl007
Review
BondGirl007 wrote a review Review · Dec 30, 2015

Back again! I just want to say that I'm not great with grammar, my reviews are based purely on how the story sounds/flows/feels when I read it. So if you want to disregard my opinions, which is pretty much all my reviews are, feel free. So let us begin!

You start out strong, I like the first sentence, it brings to mind a tiger anxious from being confined too long. It really showed me Sadie's spunk and charisma, but then the next few sentences totally threw me. I wasn't sure what to make of them,

Spoiler
Sadie had sworn years before that she’d never become a housewife, and made sure to keep herself busy with volunteer work, even though Meyer convinced her not to hold a job. Now that the initial shock had worn off, she was getting more and more restless with each day that passed.
Try moving the part about Meyer not wanting her to have a job in between her not wanting to be a housewife and her doing volunteer work. It's a much more cause and effect way of putting it and it makes it a lot easier for me to understand. Also what shock are you talking about? The shock of not being able to do as she pleases? The shock of being attacked? The shock of what exactly? Like I said in an earlier review, the characters are really what make this story, so I want to know everything that they're thinking and feeling.

Spoiler
Meyer swung the door open and walked in. “Well that sounds tragic.”
Another sentence you might want to consider changing around a bit. Instead of him swinging the door open and walking in, maybe the door swung open and he walked in. It sounds a little more typical, but flows better I think.

Spoiler
Meyer smirked, setting the boxes down on the coffee table as he walked in. “Boring old pizza.”
You used "walked in" a few sentences ago. Try describing how he entered the room, was he awkward because of the pizza boxes? What did he look like as he came in? Etc. Etc. Doesn't need much, just a little change of words and maybe a bit of description.

Spoiler
Sadie nodded, furrowing her brow at the top of the pizza box.
NITPICK! She's not upset by the pizza box, she's upset that she's not being taken along. She just doesn't want to reveal that to Meyer, right? She's choosing to look at the pizza box rather than her husband. This makes it seem like the pizza box did something to make her angry.

Spoiler
Sadie spoke her fear. “Didn’t he say he planned on it?”

“After Resnick was dead,” Meyer answered with a shrug. He pretended that Sadie’s fears were unwarranted
Again, just watch your word repetition.

Spoiler
As soon as he was seated so plopped down on the couch next to him. “What book did you bring?”
She plopped down? Also it was hard to tell who was speaking right here. I assume it is Sadie, but I'm not entirely sure right off the bat.

Spoiler
He was very old—probably well into his seventies—and barely had any hair left on his head. He had a few wispy strands of gray hair still clinging to the edges of his head, and a thin goatee on his face.
So you describe his hair in the second sentence, so it's redundant to say he barely had hair in the first one. Instead of telling us what he looks like, try describing it a little more, incorporate it into the story. Maybe the light shone off his bald spot, maybe Sadie felt the prickle of his thin goatee against her cheek as she hugged him. Don't just explain what he looks like, paint it into the while picture.

Spoiler
She’d escape to the library, just to get away from her house.
Ahhhhhh! I want more backstory! Did she have a bad childhood? Did she grow up in a typical suburban household where the ordinary boring life was crushing to her? Is that why she chose to become romantically involved with a person she knew was involved in criminal activity. Little things give a lot of character to your creations, it makes their motivations a lot more easy to understand. You give us a hint to it here, but not nearly enough!
Spoiler
He couldn’t help but wonder if this is what she’d looked like for the past twenty years – sitting with Mr. Joe, sometimes in clothes that fit, something wearing clothes much too small, sometimes bruised, sometimes not – listening while he made real life go away for a little while.
I really hope you go into their backstories more in later chapters!

I feel like the story needs a little bit more drama, I can't think of the word right now, but like another subplot, ya know? Something going on behind the scenes that all falls into place at the end, or something. As much as I like the characters and the story I'm still not entirely invested. It's a good story, I like it, but it's not something I can't put down. I'm not wondering about anything, just waiting for Meyer to get his revenge. Try contemplating the themes throughout this story and making them more apparent throughout. Like good vs. evil for example. Meyer is a kind caring person, but he's also a murderer. Sadie is a normal girl, but after being attacked and sexually traumatized she starts changing into a less moral character. She begins the story being all worked up over her husband having that folder full of targets in his desk. But then she later wants to accompany him to kidnap and torture a child for information. The best characters in my opinion are those that aren't the bad guys, but aren't quite entirely good. You can see their vices and flaws but root for them nonetheless. I like how this story is panning out, and I hope my reviews have been helpful. Let me know if you need anything!

-Hope



You can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will.
— Stephen King