Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language and mature content.
You've got big...
dreams!
Matches those massive...
ideas!
Use them whilst you’re…
young!
What do you think I mean?
Open your...
mind!
Swallowing all that...
knowledge!
Rub those...
hands together!
What do you think I mean?
Ohhhh
You couldn't possibly of thought?
Well, well, I would never.
That's just...
Sensational.
Cum on children, time to...
learn about organisms.
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137,507 Literary Works • 672,040 Reviews
Ok, so, I will not quote the whole poem, as it really is something to take into account as a whole. XD It really is a marvel in comedy and is all at once funny and satirical. It doesn't take itself seriously, and the combination in the title is somewhat paradoxical. XD
My favourite section is the last bit:
This is a double punch of humour, as I expected only the first line to be an innuendo, and the second one to not be, but you have beaten my expectations.
So, this is a bit of fun, and is unashamed in its innuendo and "that's what she said" rhetoric. This made me giggle and laugh so hard that I farted. True story! LOL XD
Okay, so I had to reread this twice before I got the message. And then I laughed loudly because who doesn't like sexual innuendos? And you did them so well. Maybe it's a good thing I had to read it twice to get it. My mind isn't in the gutter.
I found this quite funny. I'm not sure how you can critique an unserious poem.
There was only one nitpick:
This was formed oddly.. Maybe add in something at the beginning? Something to make the transition from the line before it to this one smoother, because this just sounds odd.
I do have a nitpick on the entire premise behind this: the fact that you call it a Freudian poem. Freud's theories on sex were more about cognitive and how sexual desires are in the subconscious. This poem focused more on silliness and playfulness and making one think dirty thoughts before it turns out that they weren't. So I suggest that you either make the Freudian message more clearer (and correct) or just remove it from your title. I could be wrong, because I only did take half of psychology this year, and we somewhat focused on Freud, but I did my research and I can't see how this is Freudian. It could be considered a Freudian slip, but not quite..
Other than that, this was a pleasure to read. Humorous and silly and meant to be comical. Your goal was to make me laugh, and you did, so rest easy tonight. I enjoyed this quite a lot, so thanks for sharing!
This was rather interesting. Very unique on your part. I thought you did really well on this.
The style is really cool. I like the way you worded the poem.
I found some of it humorous because before I would read the answer you gave to a sentence, I'd come up with my own answer. It seems that we have different mind sets
There was one thing I was a bit confused on though.
"Cum on children, time to...
learn about organisms. "
Not going to lie, it made me laugh at first. But when I read it again, I realized that it didn't make much sense. I don't know if it's a spelling error or if my found humor was correct...
Either way, you did a very nice job on this. Can't wait till I see more.
I'm pretty sure your found humor was what was meant to be found
You are right. XD