FEAR part 1/2 ( completely revised and updated)

Note- The writer has no intention to hurt the feelings of any Religion, person or anything. Strong language is used in this work so people who feel uncomfortable may not read further .This piece of work should be taken as a piece of entertainment only. Resemblance to any person, place or incident is a mere co-incident.

Mary was sitting in front of the idiot box as she was a couch potato .She was laughing loudly at the chasing game of Tom and Jerry. It was in her daily routine to watch television after dinner. Something stroked her mind and her inner conscious mind ordered her hand to press the next channel button which was a local news channel. She wondered for a second why her mind had brought her to this channel, but ignored the thought as what television showed at the moment was quite unexpected. Her mouth opened and eyes popped out from their dark cave. Popcorn stopped in the midway of Mary's mouth and they also started watching that idiot box. The video jockey was reading the news.
"Today the serial killer got arrested after a long period of time and as you can see in our video, how cops are reluctant to speak anything about the criminal. But the officers have assured us that the name of the criminal will be revealed soon in public once it gets recognized. For more information stay tuned with us. This is........"
Suddenly the bell rang , diverting her attention and added to her fear and astonishment. "Who could be here now, at this time !" thought Mary staring at the clock. It was 9:30 pm. Philip could not come as he was out of station for two weeks. Her fifteen years of marriage life spent in India along with her husband Philip Roy.
When she came to India from England, she was just 19 years old. Being an orphan, she came alone without her parents, leaving her country for ever. Roy was then 22 years old and according to Indian law, he was eligible to marry anyone according to his wish. When his parents refused to accept a Christian into their house, Roy left his house and settled in his city, Dreamland. Roy whose actual name was Rajeev Roy, changed his name and Religion and became Philip Roy. He was highly influenced by the Christian ideologies and doctrines. But the couple had no child and hence leading a monotonous life. News also came that after Philip left his house, his parents passed away as they could not bear the pain of losing their son.
      Suddenly the continuous ear piercing sound of bell resuscitated Mary .She stood up and started walking slowly towards the door. As the camera was not working from last week she could not see the face of the person standing outside the door.
"Hello, is anyone there, hello ....." a virile sound came from outside when heard no response from inside the house.
Mary jumped at the sound of the sudden voice, took the iron rod kept beside the door and hid it behind her back.
"Who...who's that?"yelled Mary with her trembling voice.
"This is CBI, it's an emergency, please open the door" said the person with a louder voice than before.
When heard the name of CBI she felt shocked and said to herself, "CBI ..... Now at this time! "and opened the door. There were four people standing in front of the door and despite of darkness and fog, moon light was helping the lady to see through the darkness. Suddenly one of the officials started searching something in his pocket when he saw Mary.
"Madam, this is CBI and we need some information from you if you please?" said the other officer in a rough voice.
"Me! ....um yes say officer how can I help you but before that can we get inside......." said Mary trying to relax herself but got interrupted by another officer.
"We're not here to seat and talk, Henry, show her the photograph" yelled another officer in a scolding manner, gazing at Mary.
"Hey wait, I think I know you officer....? asked Mary in a doubted manner.
"Yes madam, I was Philip's best friend............"said Henry and paused for 5 seconds and continued,"we are here to inform you that this person has been found and arrested in case of murder, so just to confirm the person's identity, may we know whether this is Philip or someone else as I have also not seen his face since I became officer."
Mary's heartbeats started fastening but with guts and full courage she took the photograph from Henry and was shocked when saw Philip in the photograph .Her throat and tongue refused to produce any sound so she just nodded. Her eyes filled with tears. She could not agree with the officers. Her heart was saying that the officers might have been misguided. She knew that her husband could not do such thing ever. "Ma'am please do not weep, it is late night right now so we request you to come to the prison which is situated near Dusty Road in Dark land, behind our office. We need some information regarding your husband. Good Night Ma'am" said the officer and in a few seconds they disappeared leaving Mary in great despair and confusion.
The whole night, loneliness haunted her, made her feel uncomfortable, restless and the environment turned gloomy. The wall clock became lazy and the hands of the clock slowed down as if it was trying to mock Mary for her anxiety and foolishness. She started thinking how it was possible that her husband could do such thing. He never ever killed a single living being, even a mosquito felt pity on him while stinging and used to fly away soon. " for what reason he would lie that he was going out of station or was he hiding something from me as he never gave information regarding his current job and what he does actually . " such agony of thoughts and doubts started disturbing her mind . These thoughts did not allow her to take a nap also. She could not doubt upon the veracity of Philip. The awaiting morning could only disclose everything to Mary. She got ready soon when saw the sun rising from the east with warmness and freshness but she had no time to enjoy the weather or even think of it, so she locked the door of her house as fast as could and went to the address given by the officer.
 
 
 
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"You know what John, these kinds of patients are very rare in this world and it is quite strange that ....." said the warden laughing madly to one officer inside his cabin. Before he could continue his conversation, the door was knocked by someone.
His burning cigar was filling the room with its foul smell in spite of the presence of sufficient ventilation.
"Have you informed the doctor about this case?" said Robinson, the Superintendent, coughing twice after entering the cabin. Both men stood up when saw the chubby but hard looking man, almost in his forties.
"Yes Sir, I did. He'll be here anytime "said the warden trying to use the ash tray on the table. He was almost choked when saw the Superintendent.
"Good, but John how many times I have to remind your moronic friend about the harmful effects of using intoxicated things. Next time if I find any one smoking inside room, he will be fired from job at sight. Got my point? "Scolded Robinson looking sharply at the warden who was trying to light off his Cigar.
"What kinds of humbug are appointed here? completely disgusting! "muttered Robinson and went outside the room keeping handkerchief on his mouth.
As he came out, he saw a lady coming towards him.
"Sir, may I know where is Superintendent Robinson? " asked the lady in a hurry.
"I guess you're Mrs. Roy, spouse of that person who was arrested yesterday night?"
"His name is Philip and he's not a criminal" retorted Mary.
"Okay ma'am, actually he'll be shifted to the nearby asylum after the confirmation of doctor in a few minutes so it's my earnest request to you to go there....." yelled Robinson and started moving rapidly away.
From inside Mary started sobbing as she was told that her husband was a maniac and criminal as well. She had more things to know and hence went straight to the guard and asked the address of the Asylum and went away. On reaching her destination she was asked her identity by the security guard and after formal checking allowed to go inside. She was directed on a paper towards the doctor's cabin by the guard. As she was entering the Asylum she felt weird. The area was dimly lit. One lunatic tried to pounce upon her, shouting, "You killed my daughter, I'll not forgive you" but the cage stopped the lunatic. In the second cage one person was staring at her as if she's an ice-cream and may melt away soon .Saliva dripped from his mouth. Mary said to herself," ewe, where ...." then one person came and asked her," yes ma'am for whom are you searching here, I doubt you're in wrong place?"
"Actually I'm searching for the head of the Department, of Psychiatry but I doubt I came into wrong way and lo...lost here even at the welcome counter no one was present.......only the guard at the main door gave me direction" replied Mary looking at the man.
"Sorry for that Mrs....? asked the man raising his eye brows.
"I'm Mary, wife of Mr. Philip Roy who is supposed to be here as informed by the officers to me at CBI office.
"Oh I see. I got it, come with me, by the way I think I am the person you're looking for." I'm Dr. Mehta, the head of department here" said the person and started walking towards his cabin followed by Mary. When she was about to enter into the cabin, she saw, it was half translucent and half opaque room. She had never seen such room before. Instead of windows there were translucent glasses for observing outer patients activities. Few calendars were hung on the wall and diagrams of brain were drawn on them. Mary could not understand any medical terminology written on the calendars. When Dr. Mehta fixed himself on his revolving chair, asked Mary for the reason she was standing at the door and not entering. Almost 50 years in age, Dr... Mehta was still looked like a young person. He had less wrinkles on his face and the reason behind that was his friendly and tension free nature. Tension and worries make a person look older than his age. On that day Dr. Mehta was in scrub suit.
Mary came towards the table where she saw a photo frame in which a little girl was held by the hands of Dr. Mehta. Mary thought that the girl might be his daughter but could not ask.
"Be seated Ma'am, don't be afraid I do not bite " said Dr. Mehta with a smile on his face.
"Actually I was told by some officers that my husband is shifted to this hospital....." said Mary in a lower voice.
"I know everything ma'am as I had got a call from my colleague and friend Dr. Hanif, and got all information about Philip. Hanif was given the responsibility to check the patient and he'll be here anytime" replied back Dr. Mehta and started turning pages of a folder.
After two minutes of pin drop silence a person with long beard and wiry figure came without knocking and said, "As-salaam-o-alaikum Doctor, these are the information, I have gathered about the patient and as I have some more patients in cue I hope you'll not be bothered in taking the responsibility ".
"Walaikum As-salaam mea, Thanks a lot, I guess you're in a hurry, anything else you want to say?"asked Dr. Mehta looking at the person.
"Oh yes, I felt strange but it seems like the patient came here voluntarily though I'm not sure for the reason behind it. That's all Doc "replied Hanif with confusion on his face.
"Okay I'll check it, you may go now buddy" said Dr. Mehta. When His friend person went away, the doctor dialed a number on his phone and asked" May I know where the patient named Philip is shifted?"
"Room Number 20 Sir," sound came back from the receiver.
In a few seconds, Dr. Mehta along with Mary reached the Room number 20 where they saw a person sitting with handcuffs at one of the corners of the room. Blood was spattered near the patient also.
With Handcuffs, Philip was sitting alone but the environment was not silent due to presence of mental patients near Philip. "Phil, dear ..." said the lady in a lower voice looking at Philip whose lips were moving sometime constantly but the sound was almost inaudible.
"Who is this person for you, ma'am?" asked the warden who was standing near the cage.
"I asked what relation do you have with this fellow Ma'am?" repeated warden when heard no response at first, with louder but soft voice.
"Ah... He...He is my husband S...Sir" replied back the young lady with numbness in her eyes.
"Can you please give some time to us Jimmy as we have to discuss something with the patient and his wife" uttered Dr. Mehta to the warden.
When the warden went away, the doctor and Mary entered the room. The room was designed in such a way that there could be no physical contact between the patient and the outsiders for security reasons. Only sound could be heard from one side to other. There was a barrier in between the rooms made up of some kind of metallic substance or some kind of alloy which was looking similar to that of a jail and touch sensitive alarm was set as well. Cameras were fixed at each corner of the room; in case of any suspicious activity the security guards could be alerted without any delay.
She continued, "I had never thought that this day would come in my life. I mean Yesterday w....when I was busy in my household works , he called me by phone four to five times but no voice came from the other side of the caller. Only what I saw was his name, on my mobile's screen .I thought he might be busy in work and as he's out of station, there could be signal problem so....... "
The doctor passed his handkerchief to the lady to wipe out her tears. "Calm down ma'am, he'll be fine in a month. I assure you. Can you tell me something more so that....."
"Yes Sir" she continued wiping her nose with the handkerchief.
"You do not know his cleverness. He pretends to be fine but internally he's dying. He never gave trouble to anybody and for that he can tolerate everything from bullying to mental harassment. "
"Madam, drink for you" said the servant.
"Oh thank you" replied Mary after taking one sip of coffee.
"This is for you sir" said the servant but Dr. Mehta refused to take the drink.
"Today is a very special day, my child was born on this date, I know you're here Elena, my darling, I'm quite sure you're safe with your mama and that's why you twinkle every night when I look up at the sky. I couldn't save you but it was not in my hands......you know what dear; today I gave a small party and mainly drinks to everyone in asylum. It was for you my baby but how can I drink first without seeing you, say...." thought Dr. Mehta looking at the photo of his daughter in his wallet and closed his eyes for a moment. Mary's sipping sound drew him back to the reality.
When the servant went out Mary continued, "Where was I?"
"You were saying something about his tolerance power if I remember correctly" said Dr. Mehta trying to bring back his lost smile.
"Oh yes doctor. I was saying about his attitude. He always loved me but he used to say "dear, I'm not scared of death but I'm afraid something bad might happen" and I always ignored his sayings. Day Before yesterday he came closer to me and kept my hand on his hand and kissed it. He said, "Dear I know, I do not deserve you. I never gave you happiness but what should I do. Something inside me always stops me. With tears in his eyes, he continued" Today I'll tell you everything. Can you see this darkness outside? The moon provides enough light to us but it cannot eradicate the darkness completely right?"
I nodded my head though I could not understand anything. He was not in a good mood I felt and I was also not very comfortable with his freakish behavior. He continued, "I'm afraid of nothing but God"
"What!"with astonishment I exclaimed. "But Jesus never asks anyone to be afraid of him, does he?"
"No dear, he does not but my soul is so bad and corrupted that I always think vulgar about him and I cannot stop it. I know it sounds silly but it is the truth. I cannot bear this pain anymore. I do not want to become an atheist, honey."
"But you never said this thing before?"
"Hum, I did not because if I had done that, you might have thought that I am mad or mentally disturbed but neither I am dear."
He came closer and said, "I love you my soul" and kissed my forehead. I remember this was his second physical contact with me after that kiss on my hand in my entire life. He was about to weep but he could not and continued, "You know, my Granny used to tell me about the heroic stories of myth and in the climax of the story the hero used to defeat the villain. It always taught me a lesson that God is very powerful. But it also created a fear inside me that if I go against God I'll not be spared. We're, according to Christianity, always told that we're like children of God and he loves us. But I have had always a question inside me. Why God punish us and what happens to God when someone do some crime like murdering someone. Why then the person is spared if he confess before Jesus. He has taken away life of someone, is it possible that by confessing the life of the innocent can be returned"
"I understand dear but it is hard to understand God and his works. You should only know one thing, that he'll do judgment one day and no bloody rascal will be spared, dear"
" No honey , I do not know what going to happen tomorrow even I do not want to know as I live in present and not in future. But why am I thinking like this? Can you listen dear my thinking are against God. I doubt Satan has captured my soul."
"No darling, there is nothing like that, it is just your thinking. Do not worry dear we'll go to Church tomorrow and meet Father Francis. I'm sure he'll be able to clear all your doubts."
"What the hell will he do, haven't you seen beggars outside the Church? They are physically disabled and crawl here and there sometime but Father cannot see it. He just vomits his philosophy and does nothing in real life. Oh no, sh*t! What am I thinking, dear I'm afraid, and I do not know what I am saying. Everyone knows those handicaps are there as they have done wrong in their past life and they are getting punishment for their act.
Interrupting him, I said," Dear you're contradicting yourself, see, once you were saying that God do nothing to criminals and now you are saying that on rebirth they are punished and are you talking about re-incarnation............... ewe disgusting."
Then I thought that he may speak more about religion and stuff so I had to stop him. I know he was brought up in an environment where people believe in incarnation but it does not mean in any way that....... okay sorry I got distracted from the topic."
"It's okay, I understand your feelings Ma'am, please continue"
"Yeah then I tried to divert him by speaking about our neighbor and about his work. He told me that he had to do some urgent work and for that he need to go out of station but return soon, I didn't know he could come in this way, in this condition....."
Suddenly a screaming came from the other ward and Mary and Mehta were informed from security guard that it was nothing but a patient who was shouting so badly that it was hard for the doctors and helpers to stick his lips.
"Ah my head.......it's paining badly" yelled Mary.
"I think that the reason behind your headache is your eye's dark circles..." replied the doctor, coming close to Mary and fixing his eye on the dark brown circles under Mary's eyes.
" Ah.... are you kidding doctor! I do not understand what do you want to say?" asked Mary holding tightly her right hand on her forehead and closing her eyes.
"I'm quite sure that you have not slept properly and that's the reason for your headache and dark under eye circles proves my statement madam" said Mehta smiling but still looking at Mary's face.
"You should go home now and have some rest. Do not worry we'll take care of your beloved husband. If I need any assistance I'll call you back and yes please fill up the form, which is a formality here and leave your contact number so that we can revert back to you" said Dr. Mehta and stood up from his chair and gave her a paper form, which he took out from the bag he was having on his back from a long time.
"But Doctor I've full faith and trust on Phil, He cannot do any wrong to anyone. Please ahh.... ahh this headache uhh really I need to go home now. Bye doctor." said Mary and took her purse from the table, which she kept after sitting on chair. Thereafter she was accompanied by the doctor himself to the main door gate and without looking behind or speaking anything she went straight to the vehicle.
 
X-----x------------------------------------------------x-------X
 
After Mary went out of the Asylum the doctor returned back to his cabin and started looking the documents again which was given by Dr. Hanif  Khan .He drew a piece of folded paper from one of the files written" Belonging of the patient" and started reading.
"Sometime it haunts me;
Sometime it frightens me
Sometime it is hard to bear;
Sometime it bring into my eyes some tear
 
I need someone to share;
The reason behind my fear
But no one is here;
So what can I do my dear?
 
It's neither the darkness;
Nor it is loneliness
But it is quite different;
This intrudes my mind very frequent
 
If I tell you;
I know it has no hue
Maybe you can call me mad;
And that's why I am sad
 
But today I am determined;
With the flow of wind
I'll utter today;
Even if it add some dismay
 
So let us begin;
Without any grin
It starts with the God;
And end up with the Lord
 
Yes it may sound silly;
But it comes daily
Without any knock;
Or any clock
 
Now it's upon you how you take;
Either make me sleep or make me wake
I need a life free of fear;
I just need you and no one my dear...................."
 
The eyes of the doctor widen more and he could not understand the mystery. He felt restless after reading and curious to know what was there in Earth which was haunting this person. He thought "I am pretty sure that something is still unknown to me about this and I must investigate more to reach the end of this mind boggling case". Then a sound came from outside again but this sound was not same as before. He stood up and ran towards the door.