Corrupt a Wish 2

Granted, but he turns out to be a royal douche. (Did I even spell that right?)

I wish I were prettier.

Granted, but that's physically impossible so the illogicalness destroys the universe.

I wish it were summer again.

granted, but you have to go to summer school!

I wish for a piece of pie

Granted, but that's physically impossible so the illogicalness destroys the universe.

Aw, Puzzle!

Granted, but the pie is gross.

I wish it weren't so blastedly cold outside.

Granted, but now it's blastedly hot. XD

I wish I had more courage.

Granted, but it turns out to be the wrong sort of courage.

I wish I knew what to do with this sticky relationship.

granted, but now it won't stick at all
i wish i could talk to monkeys

Granted, but now you've forgotten how to speak to humans.

I wish that I was able to sing without breaking glass.

Granted, but now you break eardrums instead. XD

I wish someone wouldn't corrupt this wish.

Granted, but since you can't wish for nothing to happen to your wish if you never wish for anything, you are left exactly where you were.

I wish I were more popular.

Granted, but you're now a celebrity, and have no privacy whatsoever. You have to fight just to get them out of the bathroom.

I wish that gyftds drseaaaw AWRESDFYU HBJKIOK NNLdtvgvuyg.

Granted, but now afkgeqei woyivca KOUAVTVTRVA MWOTFCJCJ leylieyELIRYdx.

I wish I could kiss a frog and have it turn into a handsome prince.

Granted, but you have now turned into a frog, so you're really no better off than when you started.

I wish that I had more free time.

Now you never have anything planned.

I wish Christmas would come 3 times a year.

Granted, but the extra two Christmases have now cancelled out your birthday and Valentine's day.

I wish I wasn't scared of heights.