Home Games All LiteraryClubs Events Forums Green Room Poetry Prose Roleplays

I like pie ^^

Nutty · 2008-10-19T10:06:56Z

Okay guys, I've been here for a while now, and am now an Instructor, so it is time for me to buckle down and help out! What I will critique: -Anything from the fiction forums. i.e Sci-fi, Fantasy, Other fiction etc. -If you want me to critique fanfiction, however, check if I know what it is based on first, or I'll be lost! -I'm willing to give my opinion on art, but I'm no guru. What I won't critique: - Poetry. I don't know enough about how poetry works to be much use, I'm afraid ^^ -Lyrics. Can't write a song to save myself. -Scripts Cost: I expect nothing in return, and I will do my best to be as much use as possible :wink: First come, first served. I'll post the title of critiqued stories here: (Now hidden, the list was getting long. Click below to check it out) [spoiler] -Scavenger 1.1- TL-G Wooster (Oct 30th) -Scavenger 1.2- TL-G Wooster (Nov 2nd) -Scavenger 1.3- TL-G Wooster (Nov 2nd) -Heart's illusion prologue- Maki-Chan (Nov 9th) ***sorry for the delay, have been doing exams*** -Heart's illusion- Maki-Chan (Dec 1st) -Project Fugato-Reason Invalid (Dec 1st) -Project Fugato (2)- Reason Invalid (Dec 1st) -Walking in the dark- LovableLittleSock (Dec 1st) -Chapter ten, Childhood-wisemann210 (Dec 3rd) -The Method of Madness-melkor (Dec 3rd) -Well this shouldn't be! prologue- Lord Anzius (Dec 3rd) -The mansion chapter 1- Lord Anzius (Dec 4th) -The mansion chapter 2-Lord Anzius (Dec 6th) -The ripper prologue-Lord Anzius (Dec 6th) -Adelade, a prologue- Lost_in_dreamland (Dec 6th) -Already Won Me- Lilymoore (Dec 8th) -Dr/Mr Vandergaurd-Kissthewitch (Dec 9th) -My Dearest Madelyn-anti-pop (Dec 14th) -Cat steps-Rosey Unicorn (Dec 15th) -The love Note (heavily edited)- Jamie_rocks (Dec 15th) -Come back with me-KailiaMarie (Dec 18th) -Chapter one of my werewolf story- Haruno Sakura (Dec 16th) -Killer's point of View- LilyJamey (Dec 18th) -Poison Love-Night Mistress (Dec 18-19th...done over midnight LOL) -Accidents happen- Kaylyn (Dec 20th) -Poison Love chapter one-Night Mistress (Dec 21st) -Well, this shouldn't be chapter one- Lord Anzius (Dec 21st) -Well, this shouldn't be chapter two- Lord Anzius (Dec 21st) **sorry. Camping and holiday stuff. >

Jamie_rocks

Gender

Points 890

Reviews 52

Mon Dec 15, 2008 12:58 am

Jamie_rocks says... · Mon Dec 15, 2008 12:58 am

Um, yeah, what Melkor said!

Name: The Love Note
Genre: Supernatural
Word Count: 4622
Link: post467874.html#467874

It's really long, so I'll understand if you don't want to review it, but I really could use feedback.

Alcohol, Tobacco, & Firearms should be a convenience store, not a government agency.

Nutty

Supporter

Gender

Points 794

Reviews 280

Mon Dec 15, 2008 7:17 am

Nutty says... · Mon Dec 15, 2008 7:17 am

Don't be silly, Jamie, I would never turn down a request.
Anyway, they are all done- any more?

It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.

Antigone Cadmus

Gender

Points 3225

Reviews 365

Tue Dec 16, 2008 12:15 am

Antigone Cadmus says... · Tue Dec 16, 2008 12:15 am

Please review?

topic40098.html
Genre: Fantasy

i know it needs to be edited. I used to think it was okay, but now... *sigh*

Thank you!

Odi et amo. quare id faciam, fortasse requiris?
nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.
-Catullus, Carmen 85

Nutty

Supporter

Gender

Points 794

Reviews 280

Tue Dec 16, 2008 10:51 pm

Nutty says... · Tue Dec 16, 2008 10:51 pm

All done.
More? *looks hopeful*

It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.

KailaMarie

Gender

Points 3129

Reviews 108

Wed Dec 17, 2008 3:31 am

KailaMarie says... · Wed Dec 17, 2008 3:31 am

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/post400537.html#400537

I just edited this, I hope it's better. (:

...

...
[url]spottedturtle.tumblr.com[/url]

LilyJamey

Gender

Points 1475

Reviews 58

Wed Dec 17, 2008 9:08 am

LilyJamey says... · Wed Dec 17, 2008 9:08 am

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic40210.html
Thanks! It's only 922 words. I need help on how to extend his background without making it sound cheesy. I edited it once already.

Got YWS?

Night Mistress

Gender

Points 1040

Reviews 250

Thu Dec 18, 2008 12:35 am

Night Mistress says... · Thu Dec 18, 2008 12:35 am

will you review this for me?

topic31457.html-Prolouge

"I love you," she whispered in his ear, before taking his mouth with her own.

~Elizzabeth Grey of Addicting Posion

Nutty

Supporter

Gender

Points 794

Reviews 280

Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:34 am

Nutty says... · Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:34 am

There, all up to date again.
Any more?

It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.

Kaylyn

Gender

Points 9917

Reviews 297

Thu Dec 18, 2008 1:37 pm

Kaylyn says... · Thu Dec 18, 2008 1:37 pm

YES!

topic40339.html

As your pretty, so be wise,
Wolves may lurk in every guise.

Night Mistress

Gender

Points 1040

Reviews 250

Thu Dec 18, 2008 3:06 pm

Night Mistress says... · Thu Dec 18, 2008 3:06 pm

back again.

this is chapter one: topic32635.html

"I love you," she whispered in his ear, before taking his mouth with her own.

~Elizzabeth Grey of Addicting Posion

Lord Anzius

Gender

Points 511

Reviews 127

Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:01 pm

Lord Anzius says... · Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:01 pm

Well This shouldn't be Chptr 1&2:

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic37125.html

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic37502.html
The mansion chptr 3 and 4:

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic35811.html

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic35930.html

To copy reality is good... But to create reality is much, much better.
-Giuseppe Verdi-

lucyy

Gender

Points 1040

Reviews 174

Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:12 pm

lucyy says... · Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:12 pm

Now, this started off as a story piece for English, but now I have it handed in and graded, I was thinking that I would love to expand on it a bit more. So, I would love a harsh, truthful critique, please, to help me along with this new working progress.
It's in 'Other Fiction' and is a short horror story. Please, take your time on it, here is the link and many, many thanks in advance!!

topic36701.html

--Lucyy xx

"Don't think, or judge. Just Listen."

JosephDean

Gender

Points 1117

Reviews 80

Sat Dec 20, 2008 7:15 pm

JosephDean says... · Sat Dec 20, 2008 7:15 pm

If you wouldn't mind...

Tomorrow Does Not Exist

I. topic40092.html
II. topic40155.html
III. post470580.html
IV. topic40731.html

I don't like throwing stories at people, lol, so if there's anything I can do in return, please don't hesitate to ask!

Thanks =]

Nutty

Supporter

Gender

Points 794

Reviews 280

Tue Jan 13, 2009 10:23 pm

Nutty says... · Tue Jan 13, 2009 10:23 pm

Sorry guys, I've been camping, I guess I'm behind, huh? Will get on them

It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.

Nutty

Supporter

Gender

Points 794

Reviews 280

Sun Jan 25, 2009 11:43 am

Nutty says... · Sun Jan 25, 2009 11:43 am

Guess what? I'm up to date! So....
Requests anyone? I need more work! ^_^

It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.

Maybe what most people wanted wasn't immortality and fame, but the reassurance that their existence had meant something. No matter how long... or how brief. Maybe being eternal meant becoming a story worth telling.
— Roshani Chokshi, Aru Shah and the Nectar of Immortality

I like pie ^^

About / Info

Forums & RPG

Literary

Resources