Make Up The Worst Possible Opening Line Ever

No! "Once upon a time," is the worst ever.

Once upon a time, everyone died.

I don't believe that there's actually a such thing as a really bad opening line because the more you make it "bad" the more the reader wants to read on to see WHY you are trying to make it sound horrible. I think....
There's such things as bad openings though.
Or maybe I'm just over analyzing things. Or maybe this is just a weird question. Either one is fine with me. The End.

This is the beginning of the book of blank pages, please read the blank pages. Read it orr you will be cursed, bye!!!!!!!!!!!

once upon a time there was a princess, she was ugly aand well.... ugly yeah and unm she met a prince and then they moved into this invisble castle which they kept running into since it was invisble and like then they got a Bunny and it like ate them. And they lived happily ever after in the bunny's stomach, until the bunny pooped them out.

THE END

**the last five mintues of your life is not refundable, I am not responsible for any cause of injury or annoyance, and if your becoming blinder and blinder each second, it's tempory and will wear off, I hope**

If you faint at the mention of blood, or are one of those people who will have to be taken to the hospital or psychocoligist when one of my characters gets harmed, you should probably stop reading, because on page 241, Bob, Fred, and Sally all die and Regina falls off a cliff.. but keep reading anyway because you never know what will happen!

If you don't send this book to twenty people you will never meet your true love! And you'll be cursed for two years! So... yeah... hurry!

This book died while it was being written. Thus, please return it the store whence you bought it to obtain a full refund.

WARNING: For masochists, condom wearers and Bee Gees impersonators, this novel may not be suitable for you.

I jumped off a cliff and died. The End. Or is that the beginning? Oh, it's the beginning of the end. But the end has no beginning. Ok, I'll tell the story from the beginning. Once upon a time, there was a me, and I died. The End.

That sound like me. Yeah.

Once upon a time, there was a big dragon with a big heart who lived in a big city next door to a big cat who made friends with a big mouse... etc. etc.

I have two!!!!

"I sometimes wonder why this even got published - the ending's a real disappointment..."

And:

"This book consists of 104730284058398504830 and a half pages on the life and times of that earth worm you stood on earlier."

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Two households, both alike in dignity. (In fair Verona, where we lay our scene), from ancient grudge break to new mutiny, where civil blood makes civil- wait, what? What did you say? You say you've read this line before? You say you've heard it spoken on stage? Well you are wrong. You have never heard this line before. And you have never read it either. It is brand new and this is the first story in which it has been printed. Anyway, back to the prologue...