Corrupt a Wish [3]

Granted. You currently have 1,000,000 and still counting comments consisting of either one character or an indecipherable code.

I wish to be the operator of an incorruptible, indestructible Metal Gear that I developed myself after I attained my faster thinking and reinvented calculus.

Granted but you're language is so confusing to the granters of your wish that they only heard the first few words and made you a telephone operator instead.

I wish that I could enjoy college instead of spending every lunchtime in the library thinking how horrible my days are going to be for the next two years that my 17th birthday is going to be SO AWFUL!

Granted, you start enjoying it, but only because you aren't learning anything, instead you are focusing on your social life. When you get out of college, you don't get a well paying job and you become a hobo. (Sorry bout' that. Why's college so bad?)

I wish that I was really good at art.

Granted, but now everybody hates you because ENVY.

I wish.

Granted. You have been turned into fuel for the granter's next request.


I wish for a wish.

Granted. You waste your wish on a taco and spend the rest of your life regretting it.


I wish for a yummy, healthy sandwich.

Granted. It's really small.

I wish for everything ever.

Granted. You are crushed by the sheer amount of objects trying to fit in such a small area, and subsequently create a black hole.

I wish for a dokodemo door.

Granted. But it malfunctions and you're left in the middle of the sea.

I wish for a magic ring.

Granted but it shrinks and becomes too small on your finger, cutting off your circulation.

I wish for a magical flying horse.

Granted, but you can't think as a human, nor act like one, etc etc.

I wish this wish wasn't corrupted.

Granted! All corruption from that wish is gone.

I wish for laser-blasting boring machine that can make a tunnel to the underworld so I can find the one of the many alien space ships down there that can fly me millions of light years off into the universe and then bring me back to Earth which will be hundreds of thousands of years from when I left and humans would be no more by that time leaving me to be the new ruler of the Earth! Muhahaha!

Granted, but the space ship fills the planet's airspace with poisonous Chemtrails, which in turn make the planet uninhabitable.

I wish for the irresponsible dairy farmers in my country to not wake up tomorrow morning, so that my children and my children's children and my children's children's children, can have clean rivers to swim in for a millions billions years!

Granted, but your children and their children's children and their children's children's children won't have the proper amount of calcium in their diets, and their children's children would soon evolve into boneless snakes.

I wish for a bunch of aglets for my shoe laces.

Granted, but your shoes are flooded with Chemtrails and you DIE.'

I wish for lots of usable money.